Tag:

my ex

She took the dog

by evildandelions 1/8/2016

written by evildandelions

I’m grieving all over again, losing that dog.

She had given her to me originally, when she left me, but then this weekend happened. I went crazy and my dad gave the dog back to her, afraid I wasn’t coming back.

And now she’s keeping her. Says the two dogs have rebonded, even though when she gave her to me, she said they’d both adapt and be happy. And she was happy with me and my parents. She loved running up and down the stairs.

I feel like this is just cruel. She knows how much the dog means to me. She’s said herself that she’s like my […]

1/8/2016 6 comments

my Crazy

by evildandelions 1/5/2016

written by evildandelions

I don’t even know how to describe this past weekend. I was sorta suicidal, but more really I just wanted to hurt myself. I took a lot of klonopin, which I think might’ve made me psychotic.

My ex called the cops on me, afraid that I’d kill myself. I had been hiding in our old apartment when the cops showed up at the door. I was scared – and this is the main reason I think I might’ve been psychotic- so I jumped from our 7th floor balcony onto the 6th floor balcony. Thinking about it now makes me cringe. I have a slight fear of […]

1/5/2016 3 comments

scared

by auron 12/30/2015

written by auron

so my ex and I were together for a year, we did drugs all the time and I ended up in a psychosis with so many delusions that I broke up with her thinking I was being followed among many other things. I’ve wasted a lto of money, I have a shitty atar and I constantly feel like I’m fighting my own mind, each day is a tremendous struggle. it’s my brithday in 3 days and I’ll be turning 19. my ex has cut me out of her life completely, calls me a stalker and talks bad about me. My current girlfriend does not make […]

12/30/2015 6 comments

Who is change nicknames?

by TexasGirl 12/30/2015

written by TexasGirl

ok so I logged in here after several months of just lurking and someone had changed my nickname to TrustMyDogB4Men. I did not do that and would never choose that nickname even though I have been through a lot of crap with someone, and it did have to do with my dog. I had someone try to kill my dog, so even though the nickname rings true, I would have never put that on here. How could someone change my name and know those things about me if I never said anything here about it? I’m really kind of creeped out. Someone knows a little […]

12/30/2015 4 comments

Why can’t I get over my ex?

by bah 12/24/2015

written by bah

It’s been 6 years. It still hurts. :'(

12/24/2015 11 comments

Feeling Crazy

by evildandelions 12/18/2015

written by evildandelions

I’ve said numerous times that I felt crazy, but nothing compares to this.

I feel so impulsive it scares me, like I can barely control myself. The anxiety is near constant and so overwhelming that my body becomes s0 physically agitated that I can’t stand it- at times I’ll cry and clutch my stomach, writhing in mental and sometimes physical pain.

I am so angry and sad and betrayed and- it feels like there is too much going on in my head. I know, rationally, I don’t want to lash out in anger, but the urge and pain is so strong. I know, rationally, that I could get through […]

12/18/2015 1 comment

New here

by usefull.idiot 12/15/2015

written by usefull.idiot

Hello all.
Don’t know how to start really. I’m 24 y.o. and i’m dealing with suicide thoughts over a 10 years now. I’m kinda ”controlling” it with drugs and weed, but once i stop using everything i become suicidal and auto destructive. I don’t know how to maintain my good mood when i’m clear, i can’t live like that anymore. I didn’t use anything for 3 days now. I just drink water, i don’t eat or sleep. I work 10 hours a day just to keep my brain occupied.
And it doesn’t matter if i’m alone, with my friend or when i was with my […]

12/15/2015 3 comments

Not interested

by evildandelions 12/14/2015

written by evildandelions

My friend came to visit; I invited him because I was so depressed and lonely. But now I don’t know if I can handle it. He tells me that “there’s so much more in life that’s beautiful” or other bullshit that I really am tired of hearing.

It’s not that I can’t get over my ex, at least enough to function- I’ve had about a decade of practice of being functional (at least the minimum) while being incredibly depressed. I think that’s one of the reasons my ex said that I was strong. Recently, she said she was the weak one in the relationship when I […]

12/14/2015 4 comments

i’m just so done

by deadbird 12/8/2015

written by deadbird

i really just can’t take the pain anymore. i’m almost done with therapy and it feels like every step forward i get, i take three back. i can’t live in a world where my ex doesn’t come back to me and i’m starting to believe he won’t.

i don’t have much access to anything. so my only options are suspension or jumping. i can’t seem to figure out suspension? theoretically, if someone jumped from the roof of their house, what’s the probablity they would die?

12/8/2015 12 comments

The best two months I’ve had in years

by ismedyl 12/7/2015

written by ismedyl

its been a while since I’ve posted on SP mainly because I’ve been pretty happy lately. About 2 months ago I had a big fight with my mom and I told her to shove it and that I would rather live in my car than live with her so that’s what I did. Yeah I had the balls to do it so I did I slept in my car for 2 weeks and I was extremely bored but happier than I was at home and then I told my ex girlfriend and her parents took me in because they always liked me only one was […]

12/7/2015 2 comments

my dumb choice

by auron 12/6/2015

written by auron

I lost my ex after a drug induced psychosis and spent all of my money (10 k ) in a year and have recently had to start again. I’ve saved up some money again and have met someone new but I just don’t feel it with her, and people complain about my customer service at work because I look depressed. I feel so repulsive all the time. I bought some oleander cuttings and plan to make tea and eat the leaves tonight. I’m not sure if it will work but I know if it does my family will be devastated, but I’m just fed up […]

12/6/2015 2 comments

Waste of space. How I wish I could end my life but I am too big of a wimp. Vent

by lilsmore 11/7/2015

written by lilsmore

Hello.

This may be long or short. I don’t know yet…and I apologize for my grammar ahead of time. I do have two college degrees but they aren’t doing me any good so no reason to try and type correctly, eh?

I have some vague memory of creating an account here at some point and I may have posted something. I was obviously drunk when I did. I have read a lot here and it has been quite awhile since I have visited. I was very serious about suicide last year and even made a few lame attempts…and nothing that got me landed in a psychiatric ward.

I […]

11/7/2015 3 comments

This song is too accurate when I think of her

by thelost 10/31/2015

written by thelost

http://suicideproject.org/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/07-Six.m4a

I know that a lot of you probably don’t like screamo, or just can’t understand it, but I was playing some songs I haven’t listened to in a while, and this hit just a little bit too close to home. It reminds me of my ex, and weirdly enough, the girl I’m chasing right now. It isn’t healthy to feel this way, but sometimes it feels so good to just hurt. Anything is better than the numbness I feel each day, which steals all the happiness away, along with my pain. Thanks to anybody who takes the time to read. I know that people […]

10/31/2015 2 comments

My Story.

by Overlife 10/27/2015

written by Overlife

So in short my ex chose weed over me. Abused me. Made me feel me feel worthless, I got diagnosed with Depression, Anxiety, Social Anxiety and anorexia. I’ve been in and out of hospital 7 times in the last 6 months because of 2 suicide attempts and the rest for not eating. I’m scared of living so I want to die. I just haven’t succeeded yet. I don’t see my life going anywhere but down. I’ve been on anti depressants for 3 months and recently came off them. I drink to forget who I am and wake up not knowing where I am. I’m a […]

10/27/2015 3 comments

And now i have no friends

by maddie_kay 10/16/2015

written by maddie_kay

So my “friend” that I was talking to about my depression misread a text I sent her. Somehow she came to the conclusion that I want to kill my boyfriend. I don’t know how anything I’ve told her could be turned into that. But she called the police and they showed up at my house last night. They asked if I was suicidal and if I was planning on killing my ex-boyfriend and myself. I said no, and they clearly thought that the whole situation was stupid so they joked a little and left. Then my “friend” comes to my door, with her cousin. I […]

10/16/2015 8 comments

I honestly have no idea what this post will be about yet

by infinitely.spinning 10/3/2015

written by infinitely.spinning

Sooo… hi. I posted on here for the first time a couple of days ago, and I got so much support and positivity. If anyone who read my previous post is reading this, thank you so much for your kindness. 🙂

And also, if you’re reading this, be prepared for a rant.

In my previous post, I essentially said how my ex has affected my life more than I thought possible. And not in a positive way. To sum it up: I still love him after over a month of being seperated, and I’m pretty sure he hates me. Because of that, I’ve started doing things in […]

10/3/2015 14 comments

You can’t make everyone happy

by donttellanyone 9/17/2015

written by donttellanyone

so my ex boyfriend keeps threatening me to take my child when I gave birth and it’s scaring me to think that I could possibly deal with something this hard myself for 9+ months and not even get the surprise at the end ? I know he’s just trying to hurt me but its so stressful . I’m contemplating running out of state because I’m not going to just give my baby up like that . I feel like he wants thes reward but doesn’t want to work for it ? I just don’t know what to do

9/17/2015 1 comment

Sinking

by dead 8/18/2015

written by dead

Everything has been a downward’s spiral. I don’t really want to do anything anymore, I’m too sad. I don’t want to go to work, I don’t want to pack my things for going back to school next week, I don’t want to leave my hometown, but I don’t want to stay. It’s like I need to get away from here because I’m more hurt than not over recent events, but I don’t have anything waiting for me at school either. Unless you count my ex who probably won’t want me back anyway because I gained weight this summer. Nothing to look forward to, nothing to […]

8/18/2015 10 comments

Alcohol and reality

by wndozh8er 8/16/2015

written by wndozh8er

I actually cried tonight, thinking about what happened over these past three days. Did a lot of psychoanalysis on myself. As you all know, Thursday night I started drinking cooers light. It’s the only alcohol my aunt will allow me to have. The problem is, I sober up to fast. The bigger problem is that I feel like a monster when I’m sober but when I’m drunk all my worries go away and I can be myself (in a way). I get scared of sobering up because I know that once I do, my problems will come back.

That night, I said screw it and decided […]

8/16/2015 5 comments

Slowly losing hope

by lifeishorrible 8/15/2015

written by lifeishorrible

I’ve been so focused on trying to be successful that I haven’t really been depressed as usual.Ever since my friend has came from jail he feels like I owe him.(long story)?The thing Is I’m a different person from a year ago.A year ago I was still lost,I didn’t know how to go on when my ex left me.Today,I just want to retire my mom & be successful.Its kinda Ironic that I’m In ?the life Insurance business but there’s times when I want to take my life.I cant kill myself now.Even after these past couple of months working 8 commission jobs & I have nothing […]

8/15/2015 1 comment

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