i cant. everywhere i turn his name is mentioned or brought up. Everything reminds me of him. everyone knows him. i try to seperate myself but i cant. I LITERALLY CANNOT FORGET YOU. I loved him so much. I LOVE him so much. if i saw him idk what id do. id break down sobing. id run up to him and jump on him. id slap him and curse at him and let him know how much he hurt me. how much he is hurting me. i cant breathe when i think about him. i see pictures with him and his new girl on fb, […]
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New Girl
I like fighting, as a sport and life I guess. I really want it all to end. But I can’t bring myself to end it, I really want something out of my control to give me a fight I can’t win for my demise. Apparently that’s tougher than it seems, I’ve been hit by 2 cars in 1 week and it left me with little more than some bruises. I’ve survived 7 attempts (apparently I’m bad at it) and numerous accidents growing up and I wake up almost astonished that I’m still on the planet. I seriously walk around miserable and I can’t do anything […]
Again, it’s me.
I figure I should do a re-cap just so no one gets lost.
My father abandoned my mother and I when I was five months old.
My mother met a new guy when I was four and I caught them having sex. Since that night, she made me watch and take part in sexual activities.
My mother moved me twelve hours away from my last piece of sanity and put me through hell with that new guy.
When I was eight my mother and I were out of a house so she shipped me off to my fathers.
While living with my […]
My life was great up until 6th grade girls became attractive, any guy who went near my crush became Satan. I was this super overweight, annoying gay guy with no life. Ok guys, sorry to rain on your parade asshole, but I’m straight, blah blah blah, suicide attempt after suicide attempt, failing everytime.
Moving on to 7th grade, my crush sort of became my obsession. She was amazing, and then she rejected me, enter my new friend, cutting. Then my crush became my hatred. Then my crush again. Then I gave up, and started taking interest in a new girl, she was beautiful, with her […]
I was born on December 16th 1998 into a loving supportive family, I don’t know how I ended up like this.
My mother was a tattoo artist, and my father a truck driver. They were too busy when I was a child to take care of me, so I had to go to daycare. The first time I was called a bad name was in that daycare. Ever since that day I’ve never forgotten everything I’ve ever been called. And that was also when the nightmares started. I don’t know if they were interconnected, or whether I just made it all up to get over it, […]
13 months ago My Ex-girlfriend of 3+ years broke up with me for another guy.
When your in a relationship for a long time you become disillusioned, you forget that what you and your partner say to each other is just a thing of the moment really. “I will always love you forever”. You forget that things can change quiet easily.
I was pretty devastated at the time and couldn’t get past it.
For the next 9+ Â months I would be moping around, thinking about her and wishing things would have worked out differently.
For a while I was convincing myself that she was simply […]
Tomorrow’s my first day at the new college. I don’t know if I should be happy about that or should I grieve, I’m at a loss. Â It seems like the best option for me is not to care, like at all. I’m trying to, very hard. I’ll meet my new group mates, and they will meet me. For them I will be nothing but a new girl, or the 13th girl. They know nothing about me. And I have decided not to tell them anything about who I am, nothing about my disturbing past. Only the obvious details they won’t fail to notice. The facts […]
Lucky him he’s moved onto a new girl i should be happy, but its only to ironic. Tanners new girlfriend is Ryanne, ive been talking to her ex dylan. She said i’d look cute with him but even though i like him i dont wanna date him, one because i wanted to give them both time to heal, and because of the fact i dont wanna date anyone cause im still not over tanner, i dont wanna use anyone as a rebound.
It’s not fair i hate all of them all this fucked up shit, i wonder if tanner knows those more recent scars on my […]
I left my abusive boyfriend/fiancee of 5 years earlier this month.. My parents practically kidnapped me and sent me out of state with realtives to get away from him.. but hes not a threat anymore.. He’s moved on.. told me the new girl he’s with is much better than I could ever hope to be 🙁 well good for them.. I still love him for some reason and that’s what really gets to me.. I know its truly a shame for her because once this happy stage wears off she’ll see his abusive side.. I’m just so hurt.
My parents want me to start my […]
Why do i feel so .. merr slutty ? Heres how it goes.. I’ve been talking to L as friends since April.. Now hes saying he loved me.. Yet in October he totally fucked me over.. Ignored me started seeing a new girl.. Now L is telling me he likes me alot & shit.. but i kinda like G .. G & L go to school together.. Same grade I do so believe.. FML :((((
L is a sweet guy.. but doesn’t say much..
G is a charming guy.. says alot.. understands me more.. Makes me smile a bunch…
I just feel horrible! I was talking […]
i miss how you would kiss me. i miss you being apart of my family. i miss seeing you everyday and holding your hand. being with was the most amazing feeling ever. i treated you wrong and i wasnt a good girlfriend. im sorry. i see that your happy now with your new girl. i wish it was me. i always wait to recieve a text message from you. your on my mind all the time. i know i messed up and its all my fault. i ruined our relationship and i regret it so much. i miss calling you my baby and being yours. […]
I am only 13. And I think about suicide often. Im so young, and ive had it so hard. Things just confuse me so much. When I was 10 I made a “reasoning book” Every time something kills me a little more inside, and makes me think of suicide I write it down in my reasoning book. My plan is when I get to my 100th reason, I will finally try to seek help. I will ask for help. I will put all my trust on a line, and ask for help. And if finding help fails, It will be my last day to breathe. […]
For the past six months I’ve been strugling with severe problems in my life. The main reason was breakup with my girlfriend after 3 years. Since the breakup I havent slept more than 5 hours a day, I don’t even go out anymore (in fear I might see her) and overall I’ve isolated myself from the outside world and things got so far I’ve been inches away from commiting suicide, however there came a point where things started to go more positive; me and ex talked about the breakup and deicided that it’s best for both of us if we just stay friends, I’ve got […]
well i guess ill start with my story since some of yall on here are new and i havent posted in awhile. when i was little the one man in my life who was supposed to be there for me left { my dad } and told my mom he hoped i died and was born with aids luckly i wasnt i was just born sick then my mom got with another man who i grew to love and called dad they broke up but i still went to his house with my new half sister everyweekend { to keep you unconfussed later i have […]
I have no idea what to do. I just need some help, I guess.
So, here’s my story.
I’ve been battling depression & anxiety for 7 years now. I’m sure I’m not unique here.
I’ve also been fighting Interstitial Cystitis for 3 years. Basically, my immune system is trying to kill my bladder. I’m in constant pain. It feels very similar to giving birth. I can’t deal with the pain anymore, and there is nothing the doctors can do to stop the disease or the pain.
I just broke up with my boyfriend of nearly a year a few weeks ago. Not a problem. We just didn’t […]
There’s a new girl who is in the waiting room at my psychiatrist’s office. She sits and waits while I sit and wait. She must be seeing someone else in the building at the same time as my appointment. She is pretty. She has more exposed cuts than anyone else I have seen. They look like they were put there deliberately. Most are completely healed. I want to say hi to her. I want to ask if she will be my friend. She looks sad and I feel crazy. Would it be wrong to ask […]
My story starts when I was in high school, I was just an average teenager there never really stood out, however I did get picked on a bit, I was getting good grades in physics chemistry and calculus but I always felt like something was missing. When I was 15 I started experimenting with drugs, extacy and alcohol mostly and I also started boxing. Although boxing was good for me physically I had a lot of built up anger inside me, maybe learning how to hurt people wasn’t the smartest decision for me to make. It made me feel good the the crack on the pads […]
Well, As it began, I was such a fool. Trying to impress the likes of you. You were sixteen years old and I was merely Thirteen. My heart was cold and my eyes were dull. My wrists were cut and my spirits were gone. Â I was a zombie. Simple as that.
One day, I saw your name on the internet, and..something drove me to look. I talked to you for a month.. During which we were the best of friends.. You were hospitalized in Florida. And I was alone in Alabama. When you got out of the place, you came back to my town (where you lived) and […]
For as long as i can remeber ive been the one to get mad fun of but today had to be the wrst i started my new school and i guess since i was the new girl people had to judge me right away but i paid it no mind plus i really couldnt hear them.anyway so i went into my second period and sat down and there was two guys sitting in front of me and i over heard them say i was fat and that i was ugly just when i was beganing to feel a lityle better about myself this happens […]
Ok here we go…this all started when i was 11 years old and all of the sudden evrything in my life just crashed. Well my life was always messed up since the start i never lived with my father and always stood with my grandma until my mom found a guy and forced me to live with them but then when i was 11 this “great” guy my mom loved even more that herself or me i guess just decided to go away leaving my mom pregnant and paying for our new house and car, just left her alone we lost our car and almost […]