To think that she would like me. Who would? Or could? I can’t and won’t.
I was almost convinced she did.
I tried to get to know her, slowly it was working, she appeared to be reciprocating; smiling, laughing etcetera. After a while we got to texting. It was nice for a few messages but then she told me she had to call her boyfriend.
Ripped.
Ripped my heart out, though it’s not her fault and I don’t blame her. I just thought we had stuff in common and we’d get along.
Every one said we’d be good together.
I guess she’ll haunt my dreams […]
Hello Internet,
About me: I am a 12 year old guy that is not very happy but I am sad.
The Internet is my favorite place let me explain why, I have a bad life and school is the main problem, the teachers laugh at me kids bully me call me names etc… There is only some Pepole that are nice to me. Pepole even some of my friends make fun of me, I try to be playful but they say stop always very loud. I have been thinking of suicied but, I am very sacred of doing it. And the Internet is fun because pepole treat […]
i had a good maby hour and a half then my brother came back home with his shitty boyfriend on top of that i have to listen to my next door neighbors talk shit to. i felt good for what felt like 2 seconds, and it was nice. i just hope i get this job then all i have to do is save up enough money and move. ill be ok i just have to leave no one cares if i leave i just cant go back to that place whats so ever ill be ok.
Why can’t people just be nice? I just don’t get it. I really don’t. How dare you put someone down to make yourself better! Do you know what you have done to that person? No, you don’t. You have broken their confidence, their self-esteem, made them question who they are…It makes me livid. I just wish I could be there for all the kids out there who get bullied or yelled at by their parents or guardians and protect them. I wish I could do something to help them. And you know what, opening up the door for someone or sending them a quick smile […]
the worst part of this shit is the fact that ill never get to tell my side of the story. Everyone thinks I’m a child molester so I have no side. I want to shout so badly that none of its true but if I do then I’m lying. I’m so tired. I cant cry because its fake I can’t smile because then I’m looking for attentions. I know god is laughing at me. Why am I still alive. I really shouldn’t be alive, I don’t event want to be alive. I have to hold everything in all the time. I lash out at people […]
I don’t think people understand the true meaning of depression, or what it really is. When you are depressed you see your life as something meaningless, hopeless, worthless, loneliness, and the list just keeps going on and on as it continues. I attend a high school and people notice that I’m always somewhat depressed or feeling down but yet people never approach me and end up ignoring me and don’t really seem to care about me or what I have to say. When people do end up approaching […]
I hate myself I can’t take being alone it’s sad…really! I work out but I can’t get abs I’m nice to people but they treat me like shit I treat the women I’m with like gold but they treat me like dirt I can’t talk to women I buy affection from strippers in the form of $30 topless dances. I have bad social anxiety I say stupid shit that’s meant to be funny and when nobody laughs I double down and run my mouth… […]
Since I was 6 years old I wanted to be like everyone else, I was always very shy, hated hanging out with guys cause they were mean to me, only girls were nice to me at the time. I felt inferior to everyone around me, I am very sensitive to everything and it just annoyed people because of it. My grades always sucked at school, I was stupid and sometimes just tried to annoy people cause people hated me anyways. I always felt like I am ugly, and hate mirrors or any reflection of any kind cause I can’t look at myself. Around 5th grade […]
It’s hard to stay alive when you have nothing to live for. When the person you loved the most left and now you have no one by your side. You want to have a chance but you’re scared it won’t work. You’re scared to let go and that’s when you start to build walls around you; to protect yourself from others. You can never be the same again and it’s hard. Hard knowing that the person you were back then won’t come back.
Am I okay? I don’t know. I feel lost and alone. I have people who love me but they could never understand what […]
you know, i posted a few times, and i got really nice people commenting, but then there’s the others blunter ones. i’m not hating on yall, i’m not blaming on yall, in fact, i like your bluntness, don’t lose your bluntness. but when you tell me i need to “learn how to enjoy life without depending so much on other people”, i’m sure you meant to help me. i’m sure you’re just sick of this person who is so fucking needy. but do you think i haven’t tried? how can i depend on myself when all i do is make myself feel miserable? do you […]
The feelings started coming back again that sort of empty worthless feeling and I’m still trying to fight it even now my trying not to cry
I read my Diagnostic report today for the forst time ever and I was like someone literally put all my bad quality in a “nice” little box and I realised just how pointless I really am I use to think that I can use what I DO have to my advantage but what I do have isn’t going to help me be successful in a ordinary part time job and I isn’t going to make me progress onto being happy and […]
If the admins are going to delete entire posts I made for exposing a bully, fraud, and a psychopath, than maybe you can relate more to the person I exposed rather than the people on here who really are genuine. This is the last I’ll speak of this subject.
i remember in school, I had a couple times when girls pretended to like me and than made fun of me with there friends the next day. I remember this one was wanting to meet me at the park. Ha never happened.
The reason I brought this up is because that’s exactly what happened to me yesterday but over the fn Internet. I just wanna get all these memories out of my head. One tragedy always leads to existential breakdowns with me. Alcohol, pills, there only temporary. Death is forever.
I hate roller coasters…..the rides and the emotional ones. I want this fucking shit to just stop. […]
i have been wanting to die for a decade. When I first came on here, I was really looking at 6 months to a year to live, enough for a “peaceful death”. Now that everything crashed around me on top of the crap I already been going though, I can’t stand another moment on this BBBofBS. The depression and PTSD is so bad that it hurts.
Thanks to my basement, I got a nice little workshop going on. Building two unique things that should make me pass out faster.
when I go to the doctor this week I’m gonna ask for sleeping pills “because I been having […]
The thought of death always occur to me. Eating, showering, every fucking time. But as always, I stay at the gray area. Always. Always. Both doors open at the same time. Change or death? Both seems so nice. Bipolar? Me? I dunno, man. I don’t get a fucking thing. Sometimes, I’m too high to function. Sometimes, I’m too low to function. AND WELL SOMETIMES I’M JUST A FUCKING COWARD. I am the worst. The most disgusting asshole. I am fucking weak. A coward. I am ugly. My body is too fucking thin. Like fucking 33kg. My jaws are too large. But nevertheless, my lover loved […]
The moment you put a gun to your head and debate if your life is worth living through all the hard times is when you’ve hit the bottom. I’m sitting alone because no one can do anything to help me anymore. I can’t help myself anymore. I’ve tried for better days but it seems that my days keep getting worste. I’m tired, my body is tired of taking the pain that the world is throwing at me. You think divide is selfish? What is selfish is the people in this world pushing people to the point of sucked. I’m not going to discuss problems on […]
I think I’m the reason I can’t have nice things. I break everyone good who comes into my life. Fuck you very much to the doctors and nurses who “saved” me that night in the ER in November 2011. You should have let the benzos finish what they’d started.
When i’m gone, don’t cry, don’t grieve, don’t write paragraphs about how much you loved me. Because, when i was in my darkest hours, you weren’t the that stayed up all night to make sure i was alright. Don’t say i was such a nice girl and wonder how people could be so cruel. Because in some ways, you were the reason i might have taken my life that night.
I made my first post yesterday, which really helped me, I feel. I was afraid everyone was going to tell me I was stupid and didn’t belong here, but that’s not what I heard. It was kind of nice, talking to people who care, even if they are strangers. Every other time I tried to talk to someone I knew I received a reaction and response that made me want to kill myself even sooner. People here actually took the time to read and even respond to me.
I don’t care if you read my post or not, but you must have read someone’s post here. […]
1. What’s your age? I am 19
2. Are you religious at all? I used to be more than I am now. Illnesses will wake you up to reality and you start believing what’s really true. What’s your stance? Atheist.
3. What’s your first memory as a child, the earliest you can remember? My step dad yelling at my mother and being scared in my room, crying my eyes out. I was 3 years old.
4. What’s the best memory you have in your whole life up until now? Being with my great grandpa in an old WWII museum as he told me stories of […]