We are all doomed to die sooner rather than later, why not just end it now? Seems to save the hassle of spending every day feeling nothing but loathing yourself. Saves the daily heartbreak of knowing no one could ever love you. With the pull of a trigger or a step off a building it could all end. Yet for some reason I can’t bring myself to do it. I’m that much of a coward. And its not the pain that scares me, its surviving. What could be worse than surviving such a traumatic event? The possibility of actually being able to see your family […]
Tag:
nothing
No love is no life, loneliness is no life. I desperately need to be held, to be touched, to be loved; a body longing to be caressed.
The warm feeling of two people sharing that moment of passion, the beauty of love. How I wish that a woman would want me, could give me love.
It’s just a song, no woman will ever want me.
What’s the point of continuing if I’m to live my life on my own.
For I am alone, I am empty, I am nothing, and who’ll miss nothing?
Just a sad and lonely creature looking for its death.
Money. It’s truly evil. Or in some part evil. I’m sitting here thinking to myself that if I had money, just maybe I wouldn’t feel like my only escape is death. I’m trying not to give up but, shit, winter is just dragging my ass down. I can’t escape from this hell I’m lock away in because going outside entitles freezing my ass off… With no car, it’s extremely hard to get anywhere… You would never guess that a vehicle is almost the most important thing, next to a place to live. I’m pretty much poor… Boyfriend can’t get anywhere to work so his mom […]
Starting over.. I’ve done it again… I was doing so good but it’s back to this.. When will it end?! I try so hard to understand it all but I can’t.. Nothing makes sense.. Questions forever left with no answers ..
Stolen pride
Stolen innocence
Stolen future
Stolen heart
Stolen mind
Stolen life…
Nothing left..
Depression is nothing new for me. Neither is anxiety. But lately I find I am irritable and angry. I get annoyed over every little thing and I imagine I’m driving the very few people I have, absolutely mad. What is one to do?
Its been so long since Ive been happy. Day in and day out I yearn to just bleed, to let it out, to let go. All the pain of my life. Some 30 years of nothing but disappointments and pain. They say that the only thing that life promises is suffering. I say they are right. Its a sick twisted world that I have chosen to bring children into. I met the love of my life and now I dont even care if it all ends. He cant even be enough to keep me here. We have a baby. Its still not enough. What I […]
a few brief words on religion (dont worry sp admin, i aint fixin ta tell all thees heathens ta get rite wit jebus)
by cathy arsis
written by cathy arsis
There is but one truly serious philosophical problem and that is suicide.
I would rather live my life as if there is a God and die to find out there isn’t, than live as if there isn’t and to die to find out that there is.
nothing is more despicable than respect based on fear. (and nothing more deviant than those who only do nice thing bc they think that’s what god wants,so they can make it to heaven, not just bc it’s the right thing to do)
Suicide is man’s way of telling God, ‘You can’t fire […]
I am a 16 year old boy and have been suffering depression for the past 4 years and still on going. I’ve had problems with my brother and parents, my friends and my faith, and lastly myself. I don’t know what’s happening to me. I have complied with my parents and doctors rules and still nothing. I’m totally lost right now. I have attempted suicide many times but have failed in the process and I have been confined in the psychiatric unit twice already, but nothing still seems to have changed expect for the fact that my condition keeps getting worse and worse. I hate […]
It is a strange thing to look back upon one’s past and find that all the hopeless despair that one had envisioned for one’s self, to be found true. Worse still, to be it greater.
My first memories were from when I was 7 years old. Ever since then I have regularly wanted to die. Without break or pause, that sentiment has held as true as the flesh on my body (as scared as it may be). I had long since, premonitioned my demise and I can’t help but feel abhorrent at its truth.
I can’t even begin to describe the shear loneliness and despair that has consumed me. It […]
Loneliness is the worst part of all of this. I feel like no one truly knows me, like I can’t be truly honest to anyone. My family knows some parts of me, the only guy I’d call a real friend knows some other parts, you guys know still other things about me and there’s stuff that no one knows. There’s things I can only talk about with my family, some things only with my friends, some things only via SP and some things I can’t tell anyone. It’s like my personality is split in many parts, and whoever I am depends on who I am […]
I don’t really know how I feel.
I haven’t talked to my friends in a month or so, at first it was because I was kind of lazy and didn’t feel like talking, but as days passed I realized how little my “friends” care. I mean, did I really mean nothing to them? All the communication I had was with one of them because she replied to something I tweeted. I know they check my twitter all the time, so they know I have been feeling like shit and they don’t fucking care! I just don’t know if I’m angry, or upset, I don’t know. I […]
People assume that when you are depressed, you are just sad. But in reality, you just feel empty. Like nothing really matters, because at the time, nothing does. You are just stuck in a haze. Your heart is beating and alive but your soul isn’t and sometimes, you don’t know what to do about. Pain comes before depression, and there still is some left during it. THAT is depression.
i dont know who i am any more. the people and things that i used to enjoy only serve to upset me. the magic is gone. i have no friends left and no will to make another. what purpose do i have? i cant find satisfaction any were let alone peace of mind. its like a constant screaming match in my head. nothing feels right any more, nothing feels real. im tired. i just want this to be over. i cant pull the trigger ive tried so now i just lay in bed at night crying hoping i wont wake up in the morning. this […]
When I said that I felt absolutely nothing, it was a lie. I did feel I just ignored it and refused to face the reality before me. I’ve made and still make poor decisions and I’m lost and confused and don’t know what the right thing to do is. I fell out of love with my ex the only guy I fell completely in love with. The whole process was excruciating but I finally realized I needed to let go. Just because I don’t love him anymore doesn’t mean that it doesn’t hurt, because it does still hurt. Remembering all the good and all the […]
You laugh in my face when I tell you how messed up I am?.. When I try to explain why I hurt because you ask what’s wrong with me? No, what is wrong with you?!?! Why laugh at someone who is clearly destroyed inside? Oh, that’s right I forgot I’m nothing but a joke to all that surround me.. I’m sorry I disappoint you. Maybe, one day when you see me cold, blue, and lifeless, you’ll feel a little better about yourself and won’t be so god damn self centered for once… Fuck you too!!! Fuck it all!! Sorry I’m such a fuck up! Done… […]
26 years working for the same company…boss half my age, 21 year old daughter sick in a wheelchair all her life, me and wife are 24/7 caregivers. I dont want to anymore. nothing is fun nothing is worthit. Cant even get disab insurance to believe Im not well so i wasted 3 weeks off no pay and will probably be stuck going back to work in a few days. fuck it. 26 ativan in a bottle in the bathroom. Only reserve i have is that its not enough. I dont want to end up on a machine. Never though I was a bad person but […]
I’m not sure of anything. I don’t feel anything anymore. I really just want to disappear. I don’t want to die I just don’t want to live either. My life is just nothing and has no worth. Yet, I still don’t want to die completely. I don’t want it all to just go black but I also just don’t want this life to continue this way.
It’s hard to put into words how I feel so bear with me.
I feel nothing. I never feel anything anymore. When anything happens I feel numb. Numb to the pain, sadness, joy, and fun. I don’t know if I can […]
I just want to sleep and never wake up. I’m a single woman in my thirties with no significant relationships other than my parents. I’ve tried to have friends but things just don’t seem to work out. I have nothing to offer people anymore. I’m to depressed. I have no children to worry about either. I have no job. I have nothing. I’m planning on wrapping a few things up and writing a suicide note for my parents sake, then taking all of my pills tonight. No one knows, no one would even care anyway. Life means nothing anymore.
I just came back from another meeting with my software team and it was terrible. The guy who is doing least (actually close to nothing at all) apparently went to see the supervisor yesterday and told him I was verbally abusing him. I mean what the actual fuck!? And he quoted a message from me on whatsapp which google translated like this: “[name], why are you doing virtually nothing? Do you think it is okay, that you pass the course only because of us?” That’s what I said. After a dozen friendly messages that reminded him to care for the 10 deadlines he didn’t mind. […]