It’s too hard to watch everyone but me get married, travel, do great things. I’m just sitting here, wasting away, working on a business that’s failing hard in it’s first week, and I have no money. Yes, I’ve applied to actual jobs and have been in the long process of a government position. Nothing’s really happening for me. It’s far too depressing. I’ve tried very hard for things to happen. Honestly, I’ve held a few campaigns from DoSomething.org, I’ve started my new business a week ago, hired so many new sales consultants to generate business (so far, nothing despite their 10+ years sales experience), and I […]
I hate life everything about it I can’t honestly tell you something I genuinely like about it. Life hurts me so much that I’m afraid to even live it because I know the pain will come. Im afraid to let anyone in, to love, to trust, to believe. Because I see things negative and I don’t think I can change that, happiness is temporary and pain is forever. I’m afraid that I won’t make it through the next branch of pain so I don’t want to let go of this one. I don’t want to be happy that way I won’t feel the pain of […]
You could look at your family right now and judge them just by looking at them because no one knows their family better than a outsider. I’m the type of person who doesn’t talk much, but feels a lot. Keeps everything in and listens to others. Having parents who smoke weed and drink alcohol everyday, gives you a different look on things. You mature faster, but don’t make good decisions. I smoke weed and yet my parents tell me not to. They think I don’t know about it but actually I take their weed and call them hypocritical. I’ve cut myself and I’m not proud […]
There is a loneliness in this world
So great that you can see it in the slow movement of the hands of a clock
People so tired, mutilated, either by love or no love.
People just are not good to each other.
We are afraid.
Our educational system tells us that we can all be big winners
But it hasn’t told us about the gutters or the suicides.
Or the terror of one person aching in one place
Alone, untouched, and unspoken to.
How many times do we have to […]
I suffer from depression, paranoia and loneliness, I really hate this life I lead,
there just seems no point to it, why do others have lives that they enjoy while I
struggle to get my backside out of bed each day. I dislike confident people most,
those who push themselves forward at the expense of others, I’m being swamped by them,
my voice drowned out. This guy at work is like those people, he thinks he’s so great,
always talking about himself and his wonderful life, I’m sure he talks about me to his
mates behind my back. I wish, and I may be pushing […]
If the world is an ocean, then shall we become sharks.
The king of the jungle, the lion. A warrior, a sabre of light.
The magic sands at the end of hell. The chain that we must cut.
Faith, is everything, everything that is. Everything that is wrong and right.
The scale. The balance. Liberty and justice. Most of all, universal and eternal peace.
Raped, our goddess. Civilization, civilization, civilization. Our populous system on our “Mother Earth.”
I wonder so much, what is missing in the soul of others. The truth – And oh, how I am so alone. Sacred crucifix.
Assemble, the journey. Who will […]
I cannot choose anything in my life. Underground Man was right. No desire in me goes deeper than my desire for truth. i was wrong when i said i will choose freedom over truth if such a choice comes. i was recently given this choice. i stuck to truth. truth is unbiased. each decision in life is biased. you need a reason to do anything, and that reason has a beginning somewhere. no reason is “holy”. something has to begin somewhere. so how can i choose anything? on what basis i will make that choice? what is worthy enough to be given preference?
And what’s worse […]
Just thought I’d poll thoughts about this.
No note could create legal problems for others (i.e., wondering whether someone had a poisoning motive). The absence of a note may leave others wondering, which may be good or bad.
Leaving a note may be a means of providing reassurance or useful instructions. (I’m not talking about the kind of note designed to blame and hurt others.)
Thoughts?
So I am new here, I’ve read some of your stories and from what I’ve read you all seem like such strong, kind, loving caring people.
I know people have this attitude towards suicide and the word strong does not come up very often.
However yes you are strong!
You have made it this far and I hope with all my heart something will come to you to help you through your dark times and help you towards a light (not particularly a religious one, but something that will give you hope to carry on).
I guess my story is a survival story, I am […]
Hey, what a great website this is! So right now I feel numb, dead inside and its driving me crazy. I don’t feel happy, sad, hungry, angry, upset or love. My Mum dies of a brain tumour Christmas before last and my ex boyfriend says he wishes I was hanging from a rope. Genuinely don’t want to fight the battle of life anymore, feeling drained and like I have nothing to give anybody. Some people were well prepared for life on earth, others struggle… that’s me, struggle though one problem after another and wonder how much more I can take… Has anyone ever felt like this? […]
Tonight I found myself driving my brother home because my uncle had made a statement implying that we’re both wasters living off the state. My brother was seething with anger and rejected the notion but for me it’s put things into perspective. All my life I’ve made excuses for myself and thought that I should be judged less harshly because I have a learning disability and suffer from anxiety and depression. I thought my family should love me no matter what. But now I realise the world doesn’t give a fuck about my problems, my weaknesses, or the bad cards it’s dealt. Â I can’t afford […]
there are times when i really want to dance the line of life and death, and others where i am glad to be alive. lately though it seems to be the latter of the two. Â there have been times when i have tried to slice my wrists, i have tried to take pills. my question is this: is there a reason i am still here?
I don’t exactly feel a whole lot anymore. About anything really. I don’t feel anything for myself one bit. I feel quite a bit for others who have pain but I always treat myself like shit. I know I shouldn’t but I’ve been doing it for so long that it’s just kind of natural for me to do it. I don’t even realize I’m doing it most of the time until others tell me to stop being negative or that I shouldn’t say such things. Eventually they make reasons for not being able to get together and then they stop calling all together. Leaving you […]
“Life is what happens while you’re busy trying to fix RSI.” (repetitive strain injury) [this is actually paraphrased]
Now substitute “RSI” with whatever you haven’t been able to fix or change, regardless of who is at fault or to blame. It could be paralysis or disease or heartbreak, or even chronically reduced self-esteem, due to an abusive childhood, or even just “bullying.” It could even be that you simply realized that humanity seems to embrace and prioritize the most absurd things and notions, and even decides to mandate injustice and tyranny into “law.”
To simplify:
“Life is what happens while we’re busy trying to fix what went wrong […]
My problems are probably minimal compared to what others have gone through but it still feels like a lot to me. I feel like my family hates me, they always yell at me, including my sister who is literally trying to control my life at the moment. My parents think i’m immature and probably doing drugs because i like going out with my friends and so they yell at me for nothing. Really they look for reasons to yell at me and everytime I’m yelled at i end up cutting, I don’t want to cut but it’s temporary relief and for a second I forget […]
Sometimes I feel like killing myself. Other times I feel like my life is perfect and nothing can ever hurt me, but that’s usually just when I’m with my boyfriend. All I know is that no matter what I feel, I always feel like cutting. I guess you could call it an addiction, but it’s kinda just my way of life now. I can’t stop, and if I’m being honest with myself, I’m not sure if I even want to. It’s like breathing to me. If my thoughts begin to overtake my mind, I cut myself and everything gets okay again. I just want to […]
The sun and the trees have life,
The people walking by infectious of there media ridden minds have life..
The sheep of the masses
Do they deserve to be slaughtered due to ignorance?
Or should they be applauded for enjoying life?
These decisions have not been left to me nor do I want to make this choice.
The only choice I want is to end my pain and suffering
A lifetime of addiction and hurting others is all I’ve managed.
I am the American Psycho watching others pass by; testing the boundaries of reality.. what if I fell off this bridge onto these cars?
What […]
When I use the word “god” I’m not talking about any particular religious image. For lack of a better word, I’m using “god” to mean whatever force created and/or governs this universe. It could be a bearded dude on a throne, it could be a mathematical equation or it could be a random spark that started a fire. But whatever it is, I hate it.
I hate the rules and patterns of existence that we live by. Universal laws like “survival of the fittest”, “kill or be killed” and “consume others so that you may live” are the laws of all living organisms, whether we’re talking […]
I can’t tell people how I feel because of a misguided sense of how they perceive me and because the words that I have, as extensive as my vocabulary is, aren’t up to the task of adequately conveying the feelings I have or the impact they have on me. I am depressed, a condition which has sat in the background of my mind for a great many years and pervades the darkest corners of my conscious and subconscious thought. Why that is and where it comes from is a matter for discussion by people that have given themselves more education into the workings of the […]