Tag:

Oxygen

Session 20: The noise they call life

by R3T31D 8/20/2014

written by R3T31D

The more you look back at it, the more it becomes clear. The chaos in the way everything around you moves, breathes, exists and ultimately vanishes into the void. I’m sort of glad I found this place, I wasn’t sure a thing like this would exist. I’ve been cutting so many ties lately, well, is still tough to linger as you start the preparations. I think it was a good idea to set a counter, so I’ll start with 20. I’ll post 20 things in here before I can manage to successfully be one with the nothingness and have the sweet embrace of everlasting silence.

I […]

8/20/2014 1 comment

Good Evening

by erinelizabethchizmar 8/28/2013

written by erinelizabethchizmar

To anyone, and everyone, who doesn’t know me I am no one special. Â I have suffered little external abuse, but I have damaged myself extensively. Â I feel awful for having put my friends and family through so much to leave them with so little. Â I survived, yet my letters did not. Â Am i wasting oxygen? Â I believe all human beings are capable of greatness ad that all human beings can create miracles. Â The only wall that stop us are the ones we built. Â All persons are capable of changing the world and all persons are deserving of love. Â You are important; you are incredible; you […]

8/28/2013 5 comments

Done with everything

by 826484946 7/15/2013

written by 826484946

I’ve considered suicide multiple times, much less than most people though. I’m not one dealing with relationship problems, trying to escape pain from a disease, or other things, you name it. I’m fucking sick of humans. I can’t live on a planet that’s full of so many useless lives, including my own. Nobody takes anything seriously anymore, and if I had the option to nuke the planet, no questions asked I would do it, for the sake of any other life forms in this universe to take advantage of what we have. Aside from my hatred for humans, I can’t stand myself. I know I […]

7/15/2013 2 comments

What is black?

by JustKeepDreaming 6/15/2013

written by JustKeepDreaming

Cold.
Tired.
Sick.
Black is loneliness.

Air.
Oxygen.
Breath.
Black is keeping you alive.

Invisible.
Gone.
Ghost.
Black is all that is left.

Silent.
Misread.
Lost.
Black is waiting for you.

Disregarded.
Forgotten.
Abandoned.
Black is me.

Mistaken.
Shadowed.
Lied.
Black is you.

Here.
There.
Everywhere.
Black is everyone.

Day.
Night.
Anytime.
Black is forever.

Run.
Hide.
Cry.
Black is inevitable.

Black is lurching,
Waiting to strike.
Black is your worst nightmare,
Come to life.

Black is unstoppable.

6/15/2013 1 comment

Well, I promised to post if it failed.

by FirstAndLast 4/28/2013

written by FirstAndLast

So I guess I’ll live up to it.

I attempted the exit bag method. I had two cylinders of helium, and an airtight bag with a good seal around the neck.

After what felt like a very long time, maybe three minutes minutes (I didn’t think to set a timer to catch a failed attempt), I thought: Wait, isn’t this supposed to cause loss of consciousness in 15 seconds? At which point I abandoned the attempt.

I’m not sure what went wrong. Maybe oxygen in the cylinders? It doesn’t confess to such on the tank. Too slow a flow rate, perhaps? The bag was full, the first 3 […]

4/28/2013 6 comments

losing

by perspectivexx 4/18/2013

written by perspectivexx

sinking under,

with no release

faster faster

it brings you peace

knowing oxygen would save you

and they don’t have that

under the sea

-e.m.

4/18/2013 0 comment

Funny really

by Runningtostandstill 4/11/2013

written by Runningtostandstill

It’s so pointless me being here, it really is. I really am a freak and a burden to everyone. Seriously, I used to be the target and now I find a target. I’m just so freaking twisted! 6years ago I turned violent and odd, not only do I lash out randomly and harshly ( I regret it instantly after) I use harsh words against people too. I don’t get it?! Surely after being the target of all these things I would help prevent it from happening and not cause it! My thoughts arnt normal ( and there is no way that I am waiting it […]

4/11/2013 4 comments

why does good news not matter?

by jumpr 2/23/2013

written by jumpr

I got word on Friday that I was admitted to a reasonably prestigious law school. Everyone at work couldn’t have been happier for me, and for about twelve straight hours, I was able to convince myself that I was a human being worthy of sucking in oxygen.

So why, in light of being accepted into this school and in knowing I’m pursuing a career I truly love, do I still want to jump?

That, I think, is the problem. If I could put my finger on why I want to do it, I’d be able to – rationally – address it. I’d be, if I so cared, […]

2/23/2013 2 comments

so destructive

by bella 1/20/2013

written by bella

i hurt everyone i concern myself with

this guy likes me, he is 3 years older than me.

he told me and asked me out, and i didn’t know how to respond because i do like him, but he is too kind and good for me, i would only damage him.

so i said no, his friends had been dumping a load of shit on me saying that he is really distraught about it and stuff.

i a can’t help but feel a pang in my heat everytime anything is mentioned about him. i wish i could be with him, but it’s not good for him.

i started getting better… […]

1/20/2013 0 comment

Hardest life of anyone in the world… no exaggeration

by PLP 12/2/2012

written by PLP

I think it’s possible I might have the hardest life of anyone in the world.

I love someone, I’ve loved her for 2 years since we first talked on Skype. She is from Colombia, I’m from Canada. We have never met but we talk all the time, on facebook… & have talked many times on Skype. The only problem is… I was sent to a mental institution, because my parents called the police & told them I was psychotic. I was just visiting my parents house over christmas, & I think my meditations & abundance of energy kind-of freaked them out. Anyways, the cops came… and […]

12/2/2012 5 comments

Craving For Pain.

by DanniScreamSuicide 11/17/2012

written by DanniScreamSuicide

Am I Insane? Waking up in the middle of the night craving just to self-harm, I could feel the need on my scarred wrist just so temped to grab my razor & press the cold metal against my skin. Deeper & deeper gliding across; red gushing out everywhere off the sides of my wrist & down my arm. Â â€œI wanna cut, I need to cutâ€ I could see my skin break as the tip of the knife goes down my arm with blood spilling out of my arm. Since that nightÂ I’veÂ been craving to cut & all I think about is suicide attempts. Maybe if I […]

11/17/2012 3 comments

It just seems impossible

by Carcolem 11/6/2012

written by Carcolem

I am a very cowardly person. Â I am a waste of space, oxygen, food and my parents’ money. I have not and never will contribute anything good to society nor nature, and therefore I believe it preferable for both me and the world that I leave. I would also like to be an organ donor. I just hope my organs would be good enough for anyone due to my unhealthy lifestyle. Most of the time I agree with myself that suicide is the best thing to do. But I can’t, for the following reasons:

Lack of courage. I am always afraid and worried of everything, and […]

11/6/2012 2 comments

Stand fast, Hold your ground, You’re doing great kid, Can’t you hear the crowd, Everyone’s singing, Yeah you’re singing with me….

by Nat.... 10/14/2012

written by Nat....

I remember, The Tuesday before I got admitted.. I was walking down a street going to buy a rope. I looked across the street and this old couple were walking together.. Apart from he was in a wheelchair hooked up to what looked like oxygen. It was a sad sight.. But I kept going.. To see a mother with her children.

All just got me thinking. And now? I’ve found out something else that has literally driven me crazy. I just want my happy back.

Stop blaming yourself Nat, You couldn’t have possibly done that. Don’t listen to them.

You were doing great Nat, But nothing lasts forever, […]

10/14/2012 0 comment

My obituary

by bleedtokwuralive 8/2/2012

written by bleedtokwuralive

Elayna Isabel Carter “Layne” will be laid to rest today after 17 years of misery on this earth

Layne is remembered by those who knew her as a pathetic excuse for a human and a waste of oxygen. She was the unwanted youngest child of Phillip and Collete Â and the stupid annoying kid sister of Matthew and Kristin.

Layne hung herself in her room leaving her family and so-called friends overjoyed that the emo psycho was finally dead and gone. You see Layne was a failure and a drain on society. She got knocked up at 14 and failed miserably at being a mother to her son […]

8/2/2012 13 comments

How come people dont understand?

by ItsJustMe79 7/30/2012

written by ItsJustMe79

Okay I said I wasn’t going to come back to this site but here I am. You ppl seem to be the only ones to understand. I’m in my early 30s and very alone. It sucks so bad but at the same time I push people away. I have these anxiety attacks and deal with depression so it embarresses me to be around anyone but at the same time I can’t handle being alone. I kno makes no sence at all. Its just like now… I lost 3 people just yesterday. Crazy weekend… had the police tracing my fone b.c. I was open to a […]

7/30/2012 5 comments

waste of oxygen

by deanne 7/12/2012

written by deanne

I’m 36 years old, a bad mother, a worse wife.Â no job, no life, I finally got the storybook family and lifeÂ I always wanted, but now I have to sit by the sidelines and watch it go by.Â I’ve tried a total of four or five times now to get rid of myself over my lifetime, and I can’t even get that right.Â I am a useless, burden to my family.Â They would be better off without me and won’t even know I’m gone.Â I use to believe that I was here for a reason and that everything that I have gone through would mean […]

7/12/2012 3 comments

on not calling the national suicide number

by bingo215 6/4/2012

written by bingo215

hi all.

someone (me) took my username, so I used my username as my password. anywho.

some idiot told me to call the suicide hotline about a month ago, and I’ve called it before, and from many different states in the USA. this was about a month or year ago. I really do forget.

I tried to kill myself for about 5 years maybe ten. I stopped trying to kill myself about 4 years or maybe 3 years ago now. Now I bounce in between states, jail and doctors offices. it’s great don’t get me wrong, if I had a gun I would shoot hella stuff, but I […]

6/4/2012 2 comments

Uk 23 overdose

by r-gervais-wattie23 5/28/2012

written by r-gervais-wattie23

Feeling really alone and stupid right now took an overdose paracetomol 80 tabletsÂ yesterday hasnt done anything but vomited pretty much non stop until this morning. I feel same way I do after every other time I take an overdose happy in a way to be alive and I think about future but then that subsides and thoughts if hoplelesness and feeling like a waste of oxygen comes back I just know Im juggling and eventually obe of these overdose will be the end of me and I just wish I could be stronger

5/28/2012 5 comments

Cured

by TragedyEnsues 4/19/2012

written by TragedyEnsues

It has stopped. Â The agonizing cries have ceased. Â No longer will I see shadows chasing my footsteps. Â I have materialized once again to bathe myself in a world of love. Â I see smiles and happiness all around me. Â I am beyond thrilled to feel a touch or witness a smile guided in myÂ direction. Â I am a victim no more. Â The sun shines on my face. Â I moisten my lips and wait for it’s beauty to bestow it’s essence upon me.

Yet, Â I cannot feel it’s grace. Â It does not come. Â The faces start to blur and laughter no longer blesses my ears with it’s sound.

The dullness […]

4/19/2012 0 comment

fuck itâ€™s startingâ€¦i need help, this is me reaching out

by JBCubbs 3/15/2012

written by JBCubbs

the amassing depression. the self-loathing, self put down. the little voice in my head telling me that i should just kill myself and be free. my fucking straight edge calling me from the drawer. my psych meds transforming into an image of freedom. fuck fuck fuck!!! how wonderful it would be, the bus driver not being able to stop in time. or the gun salesman not knowing my true intention. fuck here come the fucking tears. the kind of sadness that make me feel weak and lonely. except for the fact that i am alone and lonely. iâ€™m a pathetic excuse for a human being. […]

3/15/2012 3 comments

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