I don’t want to be here anymore. I regret it everytime I come. If I ever helped someone with my words then great. I know what I did and didn’t do or say to the one I’m sad over. I still endure those feelings, but I did this to myself. Like I’ve always done before and relized it now. If I was thankful for not killing myself when I had the strength to, I would say it. I’m going to be something I loathe, a cut-throat type of person because I know I won’t find happiness like that again. I’ll either […]
Tag:
person
Hey everyone, so this is something that has caused me a lot of stress and fear lately. I’m terrified to go to the doctor because I have horrible scars on my arm and hips. Doctors look you over and if for any reason I’d need to roll up my sleeve or they’d see my hips, they’d see my scars. Do you think they’d send me to a mental hospital if the saw them? I’ve been refusing to go to the doctor and it’s very difficult for me to tell a doctor about my depression as I once had a doctor who I went to get […]
Why couldn’t kill myself when I had the chance. I wouldn’t have so many painful memories and feel so out of place and suicidal. I only know my best days are ahead of me because one of those days includes dying. My life never started. I sometimes can trick myself into thinking that people I have met actually cared about me but deep down I know that is untrue. I hate that of painful memories of liars and heart thieves that all in all provided nothing but pain and trauma. I don’t matter. I don’t connect to anyone or anything. I shouldn’t even have been […]
“The so-called ‘psychotically depressed’ person who tries to kill herself doesn’t do so out of quote ‘hopelessness’ or any abstract conviction that life’s assets and debits do not square. And surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom Its invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window […]
Today I sat in my room in silence staring at the floor realizing I have nothing , no one. I realized i don’t have anyone there for me when i need them, that my parents don’t realize how depressed i am, that no one asks how i am, no one checks on my mental health, that in the end everyone has their own person, my mom has my dad, aaron has eric, you have your ducklings and dad, danielle has her boyfriend and sister, everyone has someone but me, because in the end im the second chose like always. Yesterday i cried because i finally […]
So, one thing that pissed off my (ex boy) friend that I still have feelings for… I’m never honest. Of course for some reason he always knows exactly how I feel. He knew that I was crying, he knew I was panicking, he knew when I was lying. That made getting away with saying “I’m okay” and “it’s okay” religiously when I was at my worst a nightmare. I’m not used to being honest with people in my life. I post my darker thoughts here and allow everyone in person to believe that I’m just great. Happy go lucky Brittany so confident and full of life…
I […]
I’m an 18 y/o girl from England suffering from depression, I think its mild/normal but to me it feels severe as I’m sure it does to everyone. I’m on anti-depressants and I thought they were helping but today I feel worse than I have in so long, I’ve been searching suicide and came across this site. I’m also wondering whether to get off the pills because I don’t want to rely on them, but counselling hasn’t helped either.
I’m bored of my life, I feel like I will fail my a levels this June and if I don’t get into uni I don’t know what […]
I know someone on here had a post similar to this but after you’ve had trauma attempted suicide are depressed anxious self harm have suicidal thoughts etc can you really come back from all that ? being the happy out going person u once was ? Or are u pass the point of no return the damage is already done kind of thing game over
how many people have actually won the battle to live a so called normal life?
and how many people have commit suicide what’s the odds I say suicide wins by far what’s everyone view on the subject ?
Dad died when i was 47 days old. it was a car accident and the person on the other car died as well. I know it’s wrong, but sometimes I wish Mom was the one in that car. I know for sure that I would be happier. Is that wrong? that i sort-of wish mom would die? I know it sounds horrible… but what can I do? I’m a monster. I can’t feel a damn thing. I saw how one of my best friends was crying her eyes out today because her grandma died and i … I couldn’t feel anything. Not a single thing. […]
My best friend recently quit university and went to rehab because of her depression/social anxiety. I wish I had the ability to just do that, I wish I had parents who took me seriously. Then again, I can’t blame them, since I have a brother who fought epilepsy for years and is still recovering. They already have one problematic child to take care of. I have to just shut up, I guess.
Also, my best friend isn’t answering my messages, or anyone’s for that matter. I have lost the only person that helped me get through my darkest times. There’s no one else to trust.
I don’t want to seem like that person who wants to seak attention when I rant or cry out for help on here. I always feel like that’s the case.. But can someone please try and convince me not to do something stupid.. At least by tomorrow..before I go to work…
I wasn’t planning on it, but come to think of it tonight is as good a time as any. I could do it and not be found for long enough for it to have a shot at working.
I’ve been considering death for long enough that I know it isn’t a passing fancy. I also know that 2am is not the best time to make impulsive decisions with permanent consequences, but I thought to myself before that the only thing between me and death was the selfishness to stop caring about whatever effects my death will have on the people I leave behind (funny how inconsequential […]
I heard this site was a perfect place for a person like me. A perfect place to write down thoughts, express feelings, as well as support others. I never thought my life would turn this direction, or if i would ever have to resort to a place like this. Its scary, thinking thoughts like this..Taking these steps.. Baby steps.. It seems like its the only solution.. To a permanent problem.. My future is damned.. I’m not sure what i want to do… I’m pretty sure i’ll be back tomorrow to post, this feels nice.. Sorry if this is a shitty post by the way, like […]
I know everything happens for a reason but I would like to know the fuckin reason
when I was 18 I lost a good friend of mine I alway wanted God/creator or the universes what ever u want to call it to take me instead I prayed that we could change places cause I know I ain’t shit and I going to be shit 8 years later I’m more suicidal and I’m still here suffering more and I know my friend would of done more with hes life I still don’t want to be here but I feel I don’t have a choice
do u think it’s […]
Awhile back, maybe too long back, I was receiving very supportive comments from someone by the username Noctis. They don’t have any posts on their profile, so I don’t know if they’ve posted comments recently or not. Has anyone seen this person/username around lately?
I’d like to hope they’re still around, but I’d also like to know if they’re not. If you know anything, please let me know.
Thank you.
And Noctis, if you’re out there, I hope you’re doing well, friend. I miss you.
Why dose life suck so much I swear I’m ready to die just need the courage to call it a day it feels like iv lived a whole life time at 26 my mind feels so old I guess like an old person just counting down the days to die iv had enough I’m tired of fighting im physically mentally and emotionally drained The life has literally been sucked out of me I’m just a walking shel just going though the day hoping a tragic accident will happen to me it’s a shame the pills ain’t how they used to be
every time I wake up, the very first sentence is ” I hate living”.
Today it was “Am I dead yet ?”
I got a roof and something to eat, but I spend all my time alone here in my room. But it makes me feel safe, it makes me feel good doing everything I want with no one here to see me.
Yesterday I was really ready to kill myself, something deep down drove me to take a damn knife and end it all, but then I couldn’t.
I called some line where you can talk but the person didn’t said anything that hasn’t be said.
I want to […]
There is someone in my life, who I have found myself to be in love with. I say it that way because it’s just that, one day it just hit me, hard. I have known her through my travels, on my way to work. I ride the bus. She’s everyone’s favorite. I know this because I ride a lot of busses in any given week. No other bus rides are like this. She’s such a kind, fun, kinda crazy person. She remembers things you say to her. I can’t imagine how many people she sees in a day, but yet she remembers you aren’t looking […]
I used to have many friends, all who would talk to me and lift me up through the deep/hard parts of life. But they keep walking away from me, as if I am not worth their time anymore. I do not blame them because I would walk away from me too if I could. I just wish I had more people in my life who actually cared about me and not themselves or their own person interests. For once, I want someone who will ask me how I am doing and keep talking to me even when I am down.
But the world is a cruel […]