Hi my name is Kim and I am 15. You’re probably going to think I’m just another overly dramatic high school girl. Im not I have been through more shit than people should have to go through by the time they are 15. My dad died when I was 11 but my suffering started earlier in life. My dad drank a lot and when he did he would physically abuse me but when I turned 9 he didn’t drink as often but I’m left with mental scarring and get scared if someone raises a hand near me. He got leukemia when I was 10 and […]
Tag:
Sexuality
I know that somebody posted about this yesterday but I wanted to put my 2 pence in. So a little context about me, I’m gay and I live in England. I’m also mixed race (basically I’m the klu klux klan/BNP/neo nazis worst nightmare) I’ve suffered some serious abuse in the past and lost family due to my sexuality, as well as some extreme racist abuse! What I don’t understand is why people are still both homophobic and racist today! And for that matter sexist and any other ist!
My first annoyance about the abuse is homophobia and the whole ‘its a choice’ bollocks! No it isn’t, […]
Hi my name Is Emily and I’m 15 years old. I was diagnosed with depression about 7 months ago. My life hasn’t been the same since. I was dealing with my sexuality, paranoia, anxiety, OCD, school,anger problems and cutting. This all led to my horrible depression. I was hospitalized around Christmas time because of a strangling attempt. I spent Christmas and New Years Eve in the hospital where I stayed for 18 days. Afterwards I started going to an outpatient day program for kids and teenagers with emotional problem called the CDU which stood for Children’s Day Unit. There i met many good friends especially one. Her […]
Among your greater sorrows let’s still take a minute to mourn yet another significant loss of freedom for me
written by The Absurdist
Welp, I “finally” start working on Monday, which is quite frankly an unmitigated disaster. Not only I’ll be alone and hopeless as usual but robbed of about 80 % of my time for the sake of stupefying grinding slavery.
Because life always does get better doesn’t it? Can’t even do anything “drastic” for a quite while, honor bound to certain parameters and whatnot. So the trap is truly and well closed.
Let’s have a toast to a life of ever increasing resignation and small everyday horrors.
Dear office dweller,
Perhaps you like your job? Or even love it?
Perhaps you don’t mind doing it for forty or fifty […]
I come from a pretty good family. My father is dead but it seems normal to me. I have a car, I’m in college, I will always have a place to stay and enough money to make it through school comfortably. I’ve cut myself before, it was when I was in Iraq. I wasn’t happy, it wasn’t the whole “war” bothering me, it was the people. I don’t like being a girl. I feel out of place. The Army doesn’t care. It was a hard year for me. I’m 24 and I’m staying with my mom until I finish college. She’s nice. Buys me what […]
Hi.. you know my other posts, yeah, them…. well they are  not true, i lie. I do this because i have a sick twisted demented little mind for a bi-sexaul 11 year old boy. Yes, you did read it right, I am 100% Bi-sexual, don’t like it?? Yeah well neither do I. I hate my sexuality. You know deathbug, well it’s funny really because we are so alike, we made sick twisted lying stories that made you fall bad for us, so i would again like to say sorry to all of the people on this site, especially U.N Owen and Holly. I don’t know […]
Hello. I’m 21 gay, super sensitive, highly anxiety sufferer, depressed.
I was abused sexually/physically when i was a kid.
all that good stuff.
well in 2010 i went to college roomed with a friend from highschool, i wasn’t really confused about my sexuality. idk how to explain it. well i fell in love with him. he outed me after i explained it the best i could. in which was i’m gay i’ve fallin in love with you, i need to move out and choose my on way. Â he taunted me, grabbed his junk at me all the time. it made me feel so worthless. when i moved out. […]
I don’t know anymore what I want to do, what I want do be, how to be good. I’m 20, close to 21 and I am just so full of problems. Social inadept, habitual liar (to others and myself), a huge range of food allergies, a bad a student that failing all his classes, and top it all of a plain retarded asshat with problems with his sexuality. I really fucking hate myself these days, for one I’m failing all my classes and I can’t myself to anything about it, when I sit down to do the work my mind goes blank and I can’t […]
When I was still in Korea  for the exchange student program, that was the time that I was so down and determined to kill myself. However, I realized that i can’t die in a foreign country.  So I just let it pass and hoping that things will get better for myself and that I want to see my friends and family too when I get back. I actually sort of planned everything when I was still there; I’ll get a job or find something that won’t me make rely on anyone financially. I was really positive about this plan because I thought since I felt […]
Well I’ve been struggling with depression and suicide for a long time now as well as my own anger and hate of the people that bullied me my entire life in the name of their God. I have been at peace with death for a long time now and feel that it would be best and easier if I can just die peacefully. I’m waiting till I get back to my college dorm room for a couple days so I can get everything together for my family and few friends. I feel as if my emotional pain and mental illness are unbearable no matter what […]
Daily I think about suicide, but I don’t act on it. It’s just that, combined with school, discovering my sexuality, my appearance and family problems, I don’t know what else to do. Every time I think about this, I think I’m being irrational, but I still can’t help the urge to do it. One thing that really led me to this was discovering I was sexually attracted to girls. Being a girl myself, I find this very hard to understand, due to the fact that I’ve had crushes on guys in the past.
When I think back on it now, sometimes I wonder whether this was […]
Just recently in January on the 14th, my BFF committed suicide. She was basically the only one I had to keep me thinking positive and always knew something was wrong. I miss her hugs, her laugh, her boston accent even though we don’t live in Mass.
Me and her were both “depressed”, going through hard times in both of our lives. Except, the only thing that was holding her down was her sexuality and Bipolar disorder. I was being bullied and heart broken almost every day.
She was a cutter and harm, I was a screamer and a crier. Still am.
If only she was […]
I want to share my story, it will take a while but the details are important. It’s a long one. I left some things out, like my utterly deranged sexuality. I hope that someone out there will read this and know that they really don’t have it so bad.
I live in the shadow of my past.
I was not abused, none of my family or friends have died, I am privileged and well off financially. My mom left my dad when I was 3, he was an abusive alcoholic.
I am attractive, intelligent, clever, creative, witty, inventive, all that good stuff. Despite all these things, I am […]
It a bit hard to sum up ones failures in life in a quick way however I will try my best; thanks to everyone that reads it,
Basically I was abused and neglected emotionally as a child sometimes physically- my mom tried her best to make me as wimpy as possible as she is a social retard who attacks and sabotages her children when ever she can and will attack anyone displaying any sort of healthy self esteem, she’s also a drug addict although not a ‘hard’ one a medicated and tobacco one. I have no idea why she does this and she has a completly […]
I recently cut myself after not cutting for at least 6 months. The trigger was so stupid, but it made me feel like the only way I could stop feeling like I was aquaplaning was to cut and I hadn’t felt like that for a long time. I took care of everything all ok, I mean I put antiseptic cream on it and then got it checked out by the school nurse when I thought it might be infected (it wasn’t). Eventually I told my mum after days of hiding it and it wasn’t a problem really, it just made her sad that I’d been […]
I don’t know where to start. All i know is at 29 i should be further in my life than this. I’ve had SEVERE anxiety issues since i was in elementary school. I had to quit school and get my GED because of it. I went to cosmetology school and didn’t take my test because i was too nervous and was scared i was going to make an a** out of myself. Anyway, my dad who has cancer pays my rent. They denied me for food stamps so i have no food and no way to pay my bills. I’ve tried to work but because […]
I am as empty as I am alone.15 years of fighting my impulses and depression has left me little more than a shell.I’ve been waiting for life to show me that it’s worth living,but I think I’ve lost the point somewhere along the way.I feel like I’m drowning.I don’t talk to anyone about the way I feel,and noone seems to care.I’ve done and been through so much,but it’s never the good stuff that stays with me.It’s the pain and heartbreak that haunts me.My pain has far outweighed my ability to cope and it seems like things get worse every year.I destroy everything I touch and […]
Older Posts