I’m just a sad song with nothing to say, about a life long wait for a hospital stay. And if you think that I’m wrong, this never meant nothing to you.
At all.
I’m just a sad song with nothing to say, about a life long wait for a hospital stay. And if you think that I’m wrong, this never meant nothing to you.
At all.
First, I don’t think i’m depressed. I just thought about it and decided that to die at a young age makes sense. I worked as a care worker for 6 months before eventually it got to me. I saw what to expect as I got to the end and I didn’t like it at all. Couple that with nihilistic beliefs and it made sense to me that to take my own life when I was happy and healthy made more sense than waiting for my body to slowly decay.
I don’t know why I haven’t done it yet. I’ve tried spontaneously when I was actually depressed. […]
Alienation.
The word that I believe best sums up my state of mind as well as any other. I wish I could just feel something- anything.Even anger would be good, but even that eludes me.
I don’t suffer from mood swings, I seem to lack the depressive despair evident in some of the other posters I see on this website, although I feel that I can strongly relate to some of the other posts I see here. I’m not upset about a breakup with my girlfriend of the loss of the of a job- I’ve never had the former to lose and I have managed to hold […]
Since I was 8 years old I started to selfharm..when I was 11 I became suicidal. I’m 16, almost 17, and I’ve developed several mental illnesses throughout my life. I’ve tried getting professional help but it’s never gone well. I’ve tried talking to my mom about it but she says I just want attention, so i’ve kept it for so long. I though of several ways to take my life…from overdose, to hitting a vein, anything really. What’s kept me from doing it is my youngest sister. I take care of her every day and she’s so attached to me.. i don’t ever want her […]
So today my cousin told me that my mentor told her dad ALL the things I told her, IN CONFIDENCE. So that includes me taking pain pills, me cutting myself, me being molested when I was little. All the stuff that’s going on in my home life. She had no right! I am so sad/angry/upset, I don’t know what to feel right now. I told her I had trust issues because other teachers/mentors have betrayed me in the past, and she told me it was between me and her. And then she does this! And what makes it worse was I saw her today and […]
I used to think that they could all see me, and maybe they could, b no I real e I m st f d ng aw . .
I have a feeling tonight is the night. So if it is, goodnight and I wish you all the best for your futures. I appreciate all the support tou have all given me but I dont think it was enough. Robert Frost once wrote the lines “and miles to go before I sleep/ and miles to go before I sleep.” It seems I have finished travelling the miles. So now I may sleep.
– effy stonem
Almost 12 in the morning. I haven’t get out of bed. Downstairs, my dogs are barking at something. They’re nervous, they haven’t gone for a walk for some days now. I feel terribly guilty for it. I guess that just not guilty enough to find the courage to face the world.
At some point, I’ll need to leave the bed, even if it’s just to feed them and go to the bathroom. It feels like an enormous job to do.
No Internet, not phone at home. The bill hasn’t been paid. Some weeks ago, it would have dragged me to anxiety. Today, it’s almost a relief not […]
Last summer, I was at a camp and one day I was really upset. My friends kept knocking on my door but I didn’t answer because I didn’t want to speak with them. After about 10 minutes, the counselor came knocking and I opened the door. To sum things up about the 6 hours after that, they thought I was attempting to kill myself. It was 6 hours of interviews, crying and honestly, a lot of people thought I had died. I told them people had misinterpreted the things I wrote in my notebook, the things I said and this one event. They believed me. […]
Humanity cannot be happy. The developed countries have higher suicide rates, possibly because humans have not adapted to life in the first world. For example, people chop down trees so they can wipe their asses. Surely, one would think that there would be consequences. First world countries have toilets filled with water, where there are other countries that are dry and impoverished. Many countries are rubbish, and other countries are busy making technologies that help destroy the planet just the same. The best way to be happy is to be an ignoramus, and even then, stupid people often tend to be emotional and violent.
I’m a loser , I am a loser in this cruel boring LIMITED real world , reality , real life .. !
I am a 33 years old Asian guy, who used to have so many beautiful hope & dreams ,
and many people have told me that I’m a smart, multi talent , very creative, & wise person
but now the more I see this cursed world, people, humans beings, and this reality, the more I lose hope in humanity , losing hope in human beings, and also lose hope in myself & my future
you see ,.. Reality / real world / real […]
So Friday a teacher that I talk to, told me that she wants me to help her in building my self esteem. I don’t know what to do. I’m so use to feeling down and taking pain pills and cutting myself, I don’t know if I can change or if I’m even WILLING to change. I told her I wasn’t willing to try and she told me to think about it and tell her my answer Monday. I don’t want to hurt her, when we finished our conversation Friday she walked away wiping her eyes. I know how much she loves and cares about me […]
I feel like there is no point to living this life anymore, I have lost everything so why not my life too
Why am I alone? I am overwhelmed with bitter regret and anger. Everybody has some big blotch of the past they want to delete, there’s no such person who has had a perfect, sugar coated life. I selfishly think that I have it so bad, nobody can relate to me. I am wrong. My peers who put on a happy demeanor have their own skeletons; they seem to know how to function without the past disrupting their routine. I don’t know what went on in their lives. I sit there and in my mind I snicker, thinking these people are so young and naive. I don’t […]
First post..the thought/idea of killing myself has become more and more reoccurring. I’m so confused. I don’t understand communication, the useless topics and small conversation that just passes time. Everyone seems so comfortable in their lives, and know what to say or what their doing, I care alot about what I sound like-If i sound stupid, or “cool?” I dont want to be like this, I want to be truthful to myself, and I try too, but how do you stop caring what other people think? And fucking thoughts..what the fuck do you do with thoughts when you do not believe in or know they […]
By the time someone actually pisses you off, for anything really, you’ve already lost…
I’ve gotten to the point where one asshole is more than enough to make me feel like I’d rather murder a dozen random people than sit idly, or prehaps even myself (god forbid >->). Not because they have any relation at all, besides being human. Natural instinct leads me to hate my own race, and wants it exterminated…
All it really is though, is just displacement, ‘taking your anger out on others’. Some people can get by punching a pillow or yelling at a cat but ohhh no not me, I see no […]
Don’t know why but today I feel like writing my story. So I will. Pardon the Grammar.
No human story is ever single dimensional. there are always multiple reasons that prompt your action and that action causes multiple effects. Whenever I have new mood or new type of person in front of me (that is, in my psyche), I see my life from a different angle. I personally like the curiosity angle and have most respect for spirituality angle. Social angle is the most ugly. I might at times mix them with one another, because ultimately they are one and the same.
(I like to recall things according […]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f2BCI4twcXg
I am the ugly duckling. I seem to always be the odd one out. My mother never seems to approve of the friends I do make and what ever choices I do make are “Stupid” and not “Rational” because I am a teenager. I think that it is okay to make the decisions that I learn lessons from. I am safe and I don’t make the decisions that are unsafe. (most of the time) I seem to be a “good girl” because I don’t do drugs or drink or what ever people define as a “teen at risk”. I don’t judge people I try to […]
THIS IS A LONG READ, I UNDERSTAND IF YOU DONT GET THROUGH IT. BUT YOU WILL NOT REGRET READING IT IF YOU DO.
Hey. So like I guess I wanna past this as a suicide survivor. And say that life. Life has always been shit. And who am I to tell anyone to, or not to do anything, like, I myself have done almost everything that you could think of that someone who was not within it would not understand, drugs, self harm, I’m diegnosed Ana, smoking, drinking, and you know what every day of my life I still tell others not to do any of […]
I was always more afraid of going numb and not caring than I was of my past and the pain. Though, I can’t cope tonight. I don’t feel anything. No emotion. I don’t even hear the voice in my head like I always do. I can’t think about living or dying.They have become one and the same. I have no preference. I’ve cut and I can’t feel it. I see is the blood but it doesn’t bring me any satisfaction or pleasure. I can’t breathe right. I think I drank too much with those pills for once. It feels like I am just shutting down, […]
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