I will try not to cry myself all the way to work.. But I know it’s useless to fight it
🙁
Tag:
useless
I find some sick satisfaction in judging others. I always compete. I always need to be better than anyone else. I always fail to be. I’m so negative. I loathe myself. My body is so hairy, even as a female, because I have PCOS and Hirsutism. My stomach is HUGE even though I lost 30lbs (I went from 140 to 110 last year but I look 150. I’m 5ft 3). My wardrobe is that of a 5th grader. I can’t afford anything new. I’m always afraid I’m going to be homeless. I have been dating a guy for 7 years who is abusive in all […]
When I was on medication the side effects kept me awake and now that I’ve been drug-free for the past half year it’s pure torment that’s keeping me awake. All day I struggle to focus on anything then I crawl into bed and I ruminate over every single thing that’s happened and experience panic attacks over all the things I can’t change. I wonder why I stick around, I’m a useless piece of shit and should have ended my life a long time ago. I don’t know why I wait for some miracle. I have nothing of value.
no one knows what am going thru, life is just one big fucking joke to me and no one cares. i cry myself to sleep every night. I’m so fucking useless that y everyone walks out of my life. They dnt care about me. as soon as i die everyone will be so glad im gone. thats if they even remember i exist
There was inter star meet.
Where organizer auctioning different planets
For some reason, I brought planet earth hoping it will be profitable
When I see into it, it is full of species called humans
Only 20% of those species are really useful for me
I separated brain out of those 20% humans and threw remaining part(body) of the humans and also I threw away that useless planet
Now I realized these preserved brains are useless because those brains are so screwed up with concepts like god, billion year old concepts of physics, crap philosophy and full of self-convincing power.
To solve a problem which I can in a day, they took 10 […]
Don’t know how much longer I can keep deluding myself. So long as I don’t think of my life – or rather lack there of – I just keep on existing, surfing through web, looking at completely inane stuff… Sometimes I read something or see something and though it has nothing to do with me and at times isn’t even all that sad I’ll feel tears welling up in my eyes. Then I’ll find a way to distract myself and pretend all is fine with me again. (Even though every moment I’m awake I know it’s not – I know I’m not alright)
Then my parents […]
Hello.
I’m not quite sure where to start off, but I feel so useless; as if my existence had no meaning at all.
You see, I started to cut when I was around 15 years old, and the people I loved just kept using me. I felt so ugly, and worthless, and continued cutting. Thing is, I stopped cutting for a while, but I had to do so again, since I had depression again; this time with suicidal thoughts.
I was about to kill myself, when this wonderful guy appears (he has loved me for around 1 year and a half) and suddenly makes everything better. And you […]
Hello. I don’t know what to do anymore. I want to die, but there always is something that stops me. I’m useless, worthless, good for nothing, stupid, ugly and fat, fat, FAT. People are really harsh on me. They even told me to go die. At the very moment i have already cut about 20 times. My parrents know about my cutting addiction, but they don’t give a fuck. I want to torture myself untill I die,but that isno longer enough for me. If anyone knows any good ways to leave this world or help me overcome this shit, please. I beg you! Help!
Not because I want to – I simply can’t keep living. It’s not even so much that it hurts (though it does, especially when I stop drowning it out with anything fictional), but because I lack some sort of characteristic needed for life. I don’t have the will to live or rather for actions needed to survive. I can’t finish university – it’s been five years since I graduated high school and I went straight to college, yet after changing my major I have spent the last three years unable to finish even the first course of my studies. I’ve had maybe five job interviews […]
When people ask me what I want to be in five years, the answer that pops to mind is ‘dead’. But when people are asking people how you are, they don’t expect the answer ‘depressed, suicidal, and really close to giving up’. Â I don’t know why I’m here anymore. There’s not future in sight, it’s just suffering. And I don’t think that I can take much more of this. I’m here because I have nowhere else to g. I’m here because I am a pathetic, useless coward, and I don’t have the strength to end it. Days aren’t days anymore. They’re jsut stupid obstacles that […]
i know i ve vowed never to come back here but here i am. i feel so empty. i just dont have anything to live for and i ve got great expectations. but this feelings is rendering me useless. cus anytime i actually impress myself with something, its always not good enough for them. they feel i could do better so they conden my every efforts. but how am i going to do better when i always feeling useless.
I guess life never was that lively after all.
Everything feels so strained and useless.
I drag dulling razors over my skin, just for a taste of existance. Just to fucking feel. I need to know I’m still alive. I’m breathing but decomposing inside. I cannot see any point anymore. Better off taking some asprin and cutting in the bath. Because I’m completely over all this. I’m over blood clots, I’m over this numb base line seeping farther and farther each night, I’m so fucking over all of it.
Everything is too much. I’ve been wanting to kill myself for so long, but I owe it to my family to make sure that it’s peaceful for them. I’m not financially stable enough for that. I really just feel like the only reason I ever save money is so I can die while still helping others. Why do I want to help? It’s stupid. I’m not needed. I’m useless and even when I try I fuck everything up. I don’t even know whether my family will miss me because they love and need me or if they’d simply be unused to my absence at first.
wish i cud simply pull out a plug and the whole of my system would go into a deep,uninterrupted slumber from which i would never wake up…
i also feel like punishing myself for being so useless… feel like inflicting pain to numb the feeling of helplessness… i did hit myself on the head and now i have a pounding headache but that doesn’t seem enough…
i don’t know what to do… i don’t know if anything would ever work….
I feel like somedays I can hide my depression, but lately I just can’t seem to send it away.
Apparently I’m a fake, wannabe because I try to be something I’m not, happy.
I can’t be happy, no matter how hard I try. It’s hard to not burst into tears in front of my parents,
in front of my friends. I just don’t want them to get involved, yet it’s all beginning to be too much.
I will deal with my problems; they can deal with their own. Even though I just want to fall asleep
and never wake up. Just so they […]
I have been having those thoughts again.The bad ones.The ones i dont want.I feel useless.Unwanted.I just wanna dIE.Disappear.Become nothing.
My last post suddenly blew up with pointless raging that came out of nowhere, so hopefully this doesn’t happen again here.
Anyway, I was laying here thinking about before when my priest told me that life is a gift after I asked why I would be doomed to hell if I killed myself…and I got to thinking, life is a gift, but if a gift is given to you and it breaks, and no matter how many times you try to fix it, it stays broken. You wouldn’t expect the person to hold on to something so useless would you?
I ask this because, maybe I do have friends, but I feel more and more alone each day. I separate myself from them. I try to be somebody for everyone in my classroom, but they just ignore me. I try to do something to impress anyone and feel like I exist, but I fear failure. I have never been able to do anything worthy. I’m so useless.
Please don’t judge me, it’s just that I can’t talk to anyone about this because they will only say I’m an attention seeker. I’m sorry 🙁
All i really want to do now is go to sleep forever. IV always been useless and ugly. I am never going to get anywhere in life so what is the point in living. The only reason i am still alive is because my death would upset a few people to much. Iv let my mum down who brought me up all by herself and wasted her life to try and give me the best she could. People tell me im a lovely person but that doesn’t matter. Just want to be normal and not ugly and to have a tiny bit of success in […]
“They†say I should be more confident, believe in myself. But I think I am confident. I know I’m useless, boring, weak, etc. I accept it. I am confident in my uselessness. Isn’t that true confidence, accepting your faults? I’m not going to pretend I’m something I’m not. Why deny the truth? What’s the point in faking it?