I don’t want advice. I don’t want to talk. i just want ideas on how to die slowly, memorably, and painfully.
Im so tired of all of this. Im blessed that i have a roof over my head. Im just tired of struggling in every capacity of my life. I dont have a method or else id be dead. I’m doing my best but genuinely what i really want is deaths sweet embrace. The permanent insignificance that ive lived my entire life is so all encompassing. Even here i feel alone. I feel alone everywhere. I dont belong. I felt belonging for such a short time so long ago i dont even know if it happened…. I’d give anything for a time machine or a […]
i wonder why the drug company’s stopped making sleeping pills and other pills as lethal as they used to be ? I think a lot of us wouldn’t be here today it’s like the government want to keep us alive for what reason ? I think we should have a choice to go into a forever sleep if our pain and suffering is for more then a few years and we are really unhappy with life that’s my opinion
Escape. That’s what we desire. Want. Who doesn’t need to be wanted? This is our shot.
The reason we feel so empty and vile about ourselves isn’t our fault, it’s our
environment. We are one and the same and we need to take steps to stay alive. That’s
why I’m leaving to roam the country, feel free and alive again…like I did before and
I’m inviting any of you to join me. All we need is each other. There is unity in who
we are. We may be the black sheep, the broken hearted, the crazy psychos. But we are
also the explorers, the innovators, […]
I should be happy, right? My birthday is soon and I’ll be 25… Fuck that! I don’t want to live to 50, let alone 25. This urge is getting worse. I want to take a knife, cut open my stomach and rip my damn guts out.
This turtle I’m eating tastes nice… like gluttony.
I’m jobless again. Idk how to feel about that. I have a shit ton of projects that can make me more profitable than another job or the scam that modern school can be. Take out thousands in student loans so you to can maybe make 45000 a year and be a higher class of broke than you are. I’ll pass. Im going to look for jobs mind you. Im just going to focus on the things i want to do as well. I’m actually more obsessed with my weight. I’ve been obese my entire life and i “only” have another 40 to 50 lbs left […]
Thanks for having me here chaps. Thanks you for commenting on my posts and apologies (to the non-cat people) for the fact that most of them included my cats!
In the UK, 2am this morning marked the start of British Summer Time. Naturally, it’s pissing down with rain, but at least the increased hours of daylight means I’ll be able to see it for longer!
Here’s my final set of lyrics to share with you. Frank Turner’s song ‘The Next Storm (it’s not all them, just the ones resonating with me at the current time) –
I don’t want spend the whole of my life […]
Nobody knows that I suffer from depression. I walk and talk with a smile, confidently and securely. But I ache. With each step that I take, it’s like the ground pushes back on my feet, sends a vibration up my body til my teeth shake and I bite my tongue. I bite my tongue to not cry. To not scream. To not die. I hate my skin and yet I love it. Why do I lotion it? What does it even matter to a body that doesn’t want to live? I wake up and I eat. What does eating matter to a stomach that doesn’t […]
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
Dear Anon( u kno who u are),
I hope you still get a spark in your eye when you think of me. I’ve went through all my journals and there was a lot of things that I wasn’t proud of writing so I ripped out the entries I’d written that were penned in anger and I’m summing up the rest here. The things that still stick in my mind had the longest entries. Like the time we first met and the time we first made love; those two moments bring tears to my eyes and make me forget any bad stuff for awhile. I also have […]
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
I’m thinking of plunging a knife in my gut or throat. I’m thinking of hanging myself. Overdosing. But pills just never work. Tried that already. I just want to die.
Someone please talk to me…
Even when people are around me, I feel alone. I am never satisfied. I just feel so utterly alone and the one person that made me not feel alone doesn’t want me anymore. I want to die a million times.
I already want to delete this…. KILL IT WITH FIREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!
Im hungry i want. Dounut and im bored somebody talk to me
things aren’t too bad. at least I think. im not sure about a lot of things anymore. its hard to believe or trust anyone anymore. a lot of people have left me and it hurts to watch everyone I love leave me and blame everything on me. I say sorry way too much and it annoys people but I cant help it. I always feel like everything is my fault and like I’ve done something wrong. I haven’t cut in I dont know how long but I still think of it every day. suicide is always on my mind and I cant stop it. I […]
I can’t fucking sleep. I haven’t been able to sleep for 3 days now and im about ready to freak the fuck out. My body feels weird in a horrid way. I just want to blow my head off, or his. I hate this fucking place. I need to leave. Tonight I’m wearing 5 layers of clothes. Under 6 blankets. He’s fucking here and I want to fucking kill him. You have no fucking idea how didficult it is pretending everything is normal. Everything is fucking peachy mom! Don’t worry about me! I’m fucking fine!
Sorry about posting non Suicidal content. If you want to know something depressing i was guilted into attending a slightly cultish Christian event earlier so there is that.
I haven’t seen the movie yet but I’m worried, really worried. I’ll see it tomorrow but my expectations are lowered. You see I’m a comic book fan in general. Not a marvel fan or dc (or image or any other indie for that matter) but i love the medium. So since these movies have become the dominant blockbuster I have been prettty happy. Also Batman is my favorite fictional character. So i want this movie to be […]
so fucking tired having to wake up at 6 am and basically run up and down stairs all day I’m mentally and physically drained plus i don’t really want to be alive but I ain’t really got a choice right now and now il feel guilty if I try again but it’s only a matter of time I guess I just hope I get it right next time unless things magically get better which I don’t think is going to happen so I’m kind of I’m limbo again
how’s everyone in suicide club today ?
I cried walking home from dunkin donuts … Again . I am going threw wired feelings lost hopeless are some i can name . Im leaving to a place I hate and people I dont want be around. Im lieing to my family about what im doing . little i thought i had im going to loose . writing this threw tears im going to force a smile in moment .