The round colorful combination is deadly
Tomorrow this will all be through.
Finally an end to my torment
They’d understand if only they knew
Raising the glass and I open my hand…
The thoughts of loved flash through my head
I drop the pills to the floor
It’d kill tomorrow if today I was dead.
Upstairs working on the computer
An electric shock as I look at the plug
The reaction is deadly assisted with water
rising my little brother  tackles me with a hug.
I sit back down grimace him a smile.
I can’t kill myself infront of my brother
He’d be dissappointed if he knew this is all he had for a sister
I could not bear his tears refering to me
If at a my funeral he said “I miss her.”
Shut Up the voices running through my head
Am I really that insane?
wont you stay away and do not love me!
Let me freeze to death in the rain.
I sometimes wonder if it’d hurt
When you hit the ground 100 feet below?
But I cannot bear to hurt the people I love,
Why they love me I’ll never know.
But in the end my death would be their favor
There life would be better if I had never beeb born.
Somehow those few still love me,
It’s between their love and suicide that I am torn
1 comment
I vote for love. But that would mean loving yourself. But having one foot on each side of the debate is not the answer…staying and hurting yourself…must be hard for your loved ones to watch. Suicide would be devastating to them. So if you intend to stay and follow the path of love…start by learning how to love yourself again. It is not easy…but possible…and life saving. You decide.
Peace
Amakua