Hey. I’m a freshman in highschool. I’m only 14. Yeah, go ahead tell me I’m young, and I have so much to look forward into life, but I don’t. My parents hate me. My friends hate me. Â Best of all, I hate me. Why? You may ask. Just because. My story? Here you go…
My hell, started last year, in eighth grade. I never noticed that I was always pretending to be happy, until me and my bestfriend were bullied everyday at school. Called whores, skanks, ugly, all the names in the book. It even happened over Facebook for me, I was attacked by maybe 7? Different girls. Why? Just because they felt I deserved it, for no reason really. Adults were made aware, cops were involved. None of them did really anything. So we took it to the principal at our school, she didn’t do jack. It faded. My bestfriend, introduced me to cutting, I quickly took up the habit. My bestfriend got caught. So did I. Â Two nights before i got caught, i attempted suicide by overdose, I failed. The social worker at my School made my mom and dad aware of only my cutting, Â when i came home from school that day, All they did was scream at me, telling me its bad, and I could get infections. Does it seem like I gave a fuck? Because I didn’t. They stopped caring after that day. They didn’t get me a counsler, depression meds or anything. They were done careing. So I never quit. They think I did quit. To this very day, I still cope through cutting. It’s my way, it helps me. Just forgetting for a few seconds is so great, that I’ll prolly never stop. So after I got caught I will admit I continued for a month or two, then I really forgot about everything during the summer, because i had decided to pick up the habit of smoking. But at the beggining of this year, everything started again. I started cutting more than ever. The problems are horrible. My parents don’t really even try to talk to me, or see if I’m okay. So fuck them, fuck everyone, fuck life. I just don’t want to suffer anymore.
5 comments
ive been called whore lots of time, but guess what i do not consider myself a whore or maybe if they consider me a whore is because they thought i was much better some stuff than they where;) but thats not the point, you should try some sports or listen to music and dancee dont smoke its awful, your smell is awfulm i bet you have a beautiful smile, dont ruin that with smoking, and your parents talk to them, tell them you need help. just remember you are beautiful no matter what they said. keep going on. be strong, smile life is full of beautiful things you just have to open your eyes, stop wasting your blood keep it inside. smile, remember somewhere someone may fall for it. be happy smile for those bastards that bring you down.
Oh, hey.
Another freshman.
Hi, fellow sufferer; I’m your age.
I have no advice (useless useless) but if you want to talk I’ll listen, maybe actually help if I can.
Bullies are a *****.
I wish there were a law that truly took bullying out of the picture. So many lives destroyed and still nothing is really being done to stop it :(. I feel your pain… Can you find any relief in something else besides cutting? I cut myself once when I was a teen and I still carry a thin scar on my wrist… the few people that have noticed it, have asked if I tried to kill myself… I have seen in their eyes how their perception of “who I am” immediately changes. I don’t want you having to hide your scars, explain yourself, be judged or embarrassed of them in the future. If there’s really no one there to help you, I could call your principal myself and talk to him until the situation changes. You might think I am kidding or that I am exaggerating, and will understand if you don’t want me to, but I am just sick of seeing all of you suffering and not do anything about it when I probably could.
I have trouble with this topic.
I’ve been on both sides of the fence.
In Elementary School I was the bully, I picked on one kid so bad he smacked me across the face with a folder, then stepped on my glasses when they fell to the floor. I hated my life, I was weak and pathetic, I was so scared of not fitting in. (the kid and I later became best friends after I stopped being an ass, but before…..
Middle School, I got it all back… and more. I was extremely tall, extremely thin, with glasses, a bowl cut, buck teeth, hand me down clothes, and a penchant for religion. (I still have most of those traits 12years later) but I survived by having that one close friend. I grew complexes, sure, (I HAVE to clean out my ears daily, I am so self conscious that i get mentally exhausted walking across a crowded room, I get the shakes whenever I’m in a competitive situation) but I made it to…..
High School, where I could talk to any social group, but I was included in none. I never went to a party, shit, I skipped every dance, including prom. The people who made fun of me, though I was worried, no, petrified about the virus that is gossip, and name calling, I knew that those people were just so insecure, that when I got home, I could forget it all… I wiped my mind clean and let myself forget the day happened, other than the joy that I was one day closer to graduation.
Looking back, I tell everyone that I wish I had dropped out, gone straight for my GED, and started college at 15/16… High School is a joke. “They” say that it’s meant to get you ready for the real world… HOW? With trig? (which most people never use) Or with Geology? Why not teach people how to fix their own clothes, or maintain their vehicle, or basic home repair?
But to the point, my question is, How can you stop bullying?
Politicians bully.
Infants bully.
Parents bully other parents
I will agree that, like most aspects of life, things for newer generations are getting more intense, earlier. But you have to see the gift that is in the torment. By being tested, by being stressed and strained, you learn to either stand up for what you believe in, or you learn how to blend in when you need to blend in.
I will never advocate for the torment, but I don’t see how it can be abolished.
I would rather fight for programs that teach kids to accept who they are, and to let the simpleminded talk to themselves. Just because kids are talking, doesn’t mean you have to listen.
I was in a similar situation in the jailhouse rec yard. I was working out. Nothing spectacular. just sit-ups and push-ups, stuff that just keeps your body moving (to stave off depression) and a group of simpleminded fools were making fun of me. The greatest weapon, act like you don’t hear them. They shut up because they don’t get a reaction out of you.
Be strong. You know you’re not a whore, or ugly, or anything they call you. And if you don’t know it, at least know that most people try to attack you, with the things they most fear, of hate about themselves.
I’m very sorry for what you’re going through. My parents don’t care either. When my school counselor called them to tell them what I was suspected of having (depression, suicidal, manic etc) they basically teased me about it. My mom called me an idiot teenager who didn’t know how to handle hormones and my dad called me names.
I am very indifferent towards my parents just because of how they treated me. I honestly do not care about them. Even if it’s obvious my dad is developing Alzheimers and my mom is a stress ball who will have a heart attack, I don’t care. I have had many many times where I just wanted to walk into the middle of the living right when they’re watching Wheel of Fortune, and just dig a knife into my wrist. i’ve also wanted to kill them. But that’s besides the point.
The best revenge against these bullies is to tough it out for the four years YOU ARE going to be there and then move away for college or job or whatever. The best thing you can do to get back at them is to show them how much better you are than them without flaunting it like you desperately need their approval.