They don’t know..

I feel worthless, stupid, ugly, fat, I feel like a loser, you name it. I felt it all. Being a teenager is a lot more complicated than adults think, especially nowadays. Classes are harder, technology makes it hard to get away from those people we want to get away from, and people are just a lot more cruel. And to those kids who have to do sports and keep grades up, it’s a lot harder than it sounds. Having the responsibilities we have now are harder than it sounds. Wake up at 5, get ready for school, trying to keep grades up, trying to memorize all the things, dealing with drama, dealing with teachers and kids, school ends at 2. After school, doing a sport that ends at 4:30.  Some of us, attending academies, so it takes 30 minutes to get home. Coming home eating because you haven’t eaten since 11. Right after that we have 2 hours worth of homework plus studying. Then being called to eat with the family, it’s about 7 by the time were finished. Having to still do homework, and it’s about 8 o’clock by then. Getting ready for bed. Then the same routine. And whole we do all that, we have to manage to have a social life and time for friends and family. On weekends, we have projects, homework, games, practice, tournaments, and then trying to squeeze in time to hang out with friends. We don’t ever have time to relax.

Some of us, like me, have other issues. Including family and friends. Parents fighting, sisters fighting, and no you can’t just ignore it, like my parents always tell me to do. It’s a lot to handle for a teenager.

A lot of times, suicide seems like the only way to get away from EVERYTHING. If there are any other ways, please tell me.

It’s not the first time I tried… Hurting myself is usually the option I choose over suicide. The physical pain seems to be the only thing I focus on, so I don’t have to think about all the other things. Stress is the definition of me.

Life sucks, life’s hard, life makes me cry, makes me mad, makes me hurt.