Number one on the list.

Connor.

That name means so much to me right now, good and bad. I have this friend, I use the term friend loosely, we met at a party just over a month ago. Since we met we have text each other every day for most of the day and we see each other at least once a week, usually more than that. He is amazing. He makes me happy without having to do a single thing, just being around him makes me feel so much better about everything and I don’t know why. I like him and he likes me, but here’s the catch. He just got out of an 18 month relationship and still has feelings for his ex :/ That fucking sucks. I can’t deal with relationships or intimacy of any kind but for him I’m willing to try. I really like him and I just want him around, I miss him and think about him a lot but I feel like I bore him. It seems like nothing but this is a big deal for me, I don’t usually let myself develop feelings for someone. All I want is to spend time with him but I feel like I’m just being boring, paranoia is a *****.