My life is in complete shambles, some off it is my own fault but not all. the only reason stopping me is the pain id cause my mother. Im 37 and when i look back 20 years ago i had way more going for me then i do now. so to me it feels like all i have to show for 2 decades is emotional pain, disappointments and and battle scars. How much further backwards doi want to go? It feels like tunneling through the earth with a plastic spork would be easier then climbing out of this whole. But i have atleast decided to wait til tomorrow!
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I’m sorry you look back and see pain and disappointment. Maybe one day, if and when you no longer have to feel this pain, you’ll see a future with better things… I hope so. It’s great that you’re making it through another day. I know sometimes just surviving is the hardest task you could ever have to do. The fact that you’re trying to do this for a loved one shows what a good person you are. You truly deserve a much better future than what you’ve had to endure so far.