My mother could’ve and probably should’ve done something sooner. I know for a fact that things would’ve been better had she just acted sooner. My father was abusive and manipulative yet it took her 13 years to realize this. Either that or fear got the better of her judgement. I don’t hate my mom, I just hate her inaction and how things took so long to change. My teenage years along with some of my childhood years are so empty thanks to all the BS between my parents. I sometimes think I should’ve called the cops myself. But i couldn’t even do that back then […]
I just recently bought some beer at the local grocery store. So how come i get dirty looks from other customers when i buy alcohol? They give me this look like I’m doing something very, verywrong by buying alcohol. I’m cool with them being cautious because i do have a baby face so its understandable why some might be concerned. However that isn’t my problem. As a matter of fact I’m a cashier at a grocery store too and i card baby-faced people like myself all the time just to be safe. My problem is that society often assumes everyone who drinks is up to […]
Today was Christmas Eve and i am somewhat sad because all my co-workers seemed to hate how cheery i was today. I’m typically always happy and in a good mood no matter what day it is but for some reason it irritated some of my co-workers today. I work at a grocery store as a cashier and so it was super busy today but i didn’t mind. After all, who wants to be served by a grumpy employee on Christmas Eve? I know i wouldn’t appreciate it if i went through some cashiers line and got dealt a mean attitude. I understand being a cashier […]
I hope nobody hurts my mom. She drives for Uber and she makes some nice money doing it. I just hope none of these butt-hurt taxi cab drivers do anything stupid that’ll piss me off. I understand that Uber and Lyft is kicking taxi bumpers left and right but there’s no need for these taxi drivers to take out their frustrations on my mom who isn’t trying to hurt anyone. She’s just trying to make a living just like they are. My mom tells me stories about how taxi drivers ***** and complain to her about how they ain’t getting as many customers as before […]
A message to the asshole who will never read this. “FUCK YOU!” i can’t stand assholes like you who believe the world revolves around you. I apologize if your too brain dead to answer a simple question but its my fucking job. I ask if you have a Safeway card and you react like I just asked you to solve the worlds most difficult riddle. Its a simple yes or no question. I ain’t asking you to wipe my ass! Oh and if pulling your card out of your pocket is too hard then why even waste your energy driving to the grocery store? I […]
If you love the earth so much then why do you aim so low? Do you guys really believe refusing plastic bags at the grocery store will even make a difference? If you do then you’re delusional. Human beings are self-destructive by nature. Refusing a bag wont do shit for as long as there are thousands of nukes laying around on this planet. If you wanna make the Earth a “Greener place” then you’re better off planting a shit ton of trees and plants in your backyard. But simply refusing to use plastic bags doesn’t actually solve jack shit. You yourselves know you’re in the […]
And the DMV is taking their sweet ass time to send me my new ID. It sucks because i wanna drink some brew but i can’t because every store is rejecting my temporary ID. Oddly enough it only worked once and it was on my first try but every time after that the cashier has rejected me. Off course i don’t blame em, I still look like a f***ing kid. Now I haven’t tried growing my facial hair out so maybe I’ll give that a try. But by the time i grow out my beard I’ll have my new ID so thats pointless. Anyways am […]
Why am i afraid of love? I enjoy talking to her and bonding but for some reason i can’t allow myself to get past a certain stage with women. It’s like the initial spark is easy to take in, however i can never make it something serious. I always cut myself off from these connections naturally. Its not because i want to but i do it because i fear of what it could turn out to be. The tought of being in love with somebody sounds nice but it also scares me. I think I’m afraid of allowing myself to be happy with someone and […]
I guess facebook and social media is where all the deep shit is. I just created my first facebook account and i saw all the shit my family members post and some of it surpises me. Its not even just family members but also old friends. I am shocked by their distrust in me. They have all these problems going on and yet they can’t talk to me about it in person. They wanna go tell their “homies” first before i even find out about it. Which naturally begs the question what the hell am i to them? I am their brother, son, friend. So […]
These last couple of weeks have been super upsetting for me. I don’t know if this is a senior citizen thing but i have been interacting with some of the most disrespectful senior citizens I’ve ever met lately. They say the rudest shit ever. And they really try to get me upset. It seems like its on their daily agenda to piss me off just cuz I’m young. I’m 21yrs old and for some reason they target me as someone to bully. I say bully because i can say some horrible things back but i choose not to because i dont like doing that. I […]
I would never allow myself to take up that position because i feel it defeats the purpose of why I’m good at it. I don’t like helping people emotionally because of a paycheck. I love helping others up because I don’t like seeing others suffer and if i can help for free then i will help for free. I don’t want the sufferers money in exchange for a helping hand. I will give you a hand when you need a hand and you wont owe me anything. I just want whoever i help to be happy. Another silly thing about being a “licensed therapist” is […]
I’ve spent a good chunk of my adolescence depressed so now that I’m not it feels weird. Almost as if my happiness isn’t meant to be. I’m happier these days but it feels weird. Maybe its because I’m not used to positivity yet. I feel a sense of personality disorder. I’m all cheery around people these days and it feels like i shouldn’t be this way due to my past. I guess this is part of changing my ways. I get embarrassed being seen by others who have known me as dark and depressed back in the day. I know i shouldn’t care what others […]
I will be the complete opposite of my dad. I won’t have “accidents”. I will welcome the kids who are known as accidents. I will adopt these “accidents” and turn them into miracles for this world. But not yet because I’m not capable financially or emotionally yet. But someday i will when I’m more stronger and more than capable enough to do so. Besides, sex isn’t so amazing that i would risk it. Even if sex was all that great, I’d use protection because its selfish and unfair to create “accidents”. I don’t do one night stands because that kinda thing feels empty. I’m not […]
I feel awkward sometimes when old classmates see me these days. I’m not the same as i used to be back in the day, not one bit and so when they see me they give me a shocked look. Its sort of like a “wtf!?! happened to you?!” expression that they get. Some of them try to hide from me. And only a few that thought i was cool say hi to me but the ones that say hi to me are pleasantly shocked by how much I’ve changed. I even saw my old gf at work when she was buying groceries with her new […]
I feel like i have no problems in life right now besides a couple and so I’m happy often these days. Although one of the few things that bring me down sometimes is how my happiness seems to make others despise me. I work as a cashier at a grocery store and so its not the best job in the world but I am grateful to be employed so i make the most of it. I realize some of my co-workers want more than this and well i do too but i figure I’m right where I led myself to be. All of my past […]
My father was holding me back in life and I hadn’t realized this until now that i moved out. I feel happier these days, happier than I’ve ever felt in a while. My insecurities are quickly vanishing within a matter of weeks. I had forgotten how social the real me was. Surprisingly I’m quite impressive with the ladies. I can sleep better too.
My fathers’ anger has empowered me to take a leap of faith into unknown territory but to my surprise I’m doing just fine living in an apartment by myself….more than fine…I feel awesome!! I will sacrifice a mansion for a healthy mind any […]
It doesnt make me as sad as it used to but ever since i started working minimum wage jobs I’ve noticed certain employees start having problems with my happy and cheerful attitude at work. Its like they dislike happiness. I just dont get why they react so negativity about my happy vibes. I suppose they dont understand the value and great power of pursuing happiness. I get that things could be better and it’d be nice to get paid $40 an hour or even be a business man but things could be much worse too. And thats where perspective plays a big role in how […]
I find it hard to write neatly on a hard electronic screen. My hand writing is decent on paper with the use of a pencil or pen but electronic screens make it hard for me to write. My signature looks like a little kid wrote it. Those screens dont offer much friction between the inkless pen and itself so i end up sliding too far. The tips are sometimes really thick too so its hard to know where my writing is going to appear on the screen. And in some instances the writing takes a while to even appear after you’ve already made your strokes […]
So today i met with my dad at a fast food restaurant to fix an issue on my tax returns. He was mad at me because I messed up on them and I said i was independent when i was still living under his roof so now he got charged a big fee for my mistake. I hadn’t seen him in a while because me and him don’t get along so well. But i left because i got tired of living with him and i moved in with my mom. Ever since i was young I was always afraid of him. My earliest memories include […]
I dont know how to feel in front of my mom when she explains to me that she’s having surgery and that she may have cancer as well. I wanna say loving things to her that i know would make her tear up but i feel like thats the equivalent of saying my goodbyes before she possibly dies. I haven’t acted worried in front of her lately and its because i want her to know i believe everything will be alright. She will die someday just like everyone else on Earth but I don’t want it to be soon so I am acting like there’s […]