For your poems.
From Ellen’s home planet, good morning to you. 🙂
I wrote a poem today. About all the misunderstoodment about how I look like and how I really feel. My therapists don’t understand me, I explained it so many times. They keep saying that I don’t have a mask and that it’s the real me how I act, but that I think it’s a mask. Yeah right, so I have feeling so depressed for so many times, but acted like I was happy, but my therapists tell me that I really was happy in that time. So they tell my that I haven’t felt suicidal and depressed? How can they know what I feel?
Here’s the […]
Hello everyone.
Today is my last day. Tonight I will be ending things and finally finding total freedom and nothingness.
To my dear Nat, goodbye my sweet Princess. Just keeping my promise to tell you goodbye. Sent you an email not sure if you got it.
To any others who I have conversed with. I really hope things have improved for you or will improve. And that your pain lessens enough for life to be at least somewhat joyful. Many of you are suffering mainly or totally because of others and I wish I had the power to take that pain away from you. Sometimes people are treated […]
I’m the not-so-cute friend of the girl you fancy,
I am the ugly sweater your granny spent months making that your mother won’t let you throw away,
I am all the Avon catalogs in your letter box, you choose to ignore.
I am all your missing socks that you never bother looking for.
I am the wilting pot plant you forgot to water weeks ago.
The half eaten sandwich your mother tenderly made for you. (She even cut off the crust)
The quiet file on the bottom shelf.
Nobody WANTS to understand.
Society’s just a big shambles.
Everybody cares when you’re dead.
What’s the point?!
“Can the lonely take the place of you?”
I’ll forever be fine in your eyes. I don’t hurt. I don’t cry. I don’t cut my skin. I don’t want to die. I’m not unhappy.
I don’t think about killing myself every single moment of every single day.
“But though you’re still with me, I’ve been alone all along.”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WFjKJc-Sn-w
Beautiful and vibrant as can be,
That’s how they remember me,
So far from what I used to be,
I hid from the world; you see,
Skin so smooth and fair,
Now scarred and dry,
I still have my beautiful hair,
But I changed so much it makes me cry.
I cry myself to sleep when no one’s there,
Trying to accept the damaged look,
So much lost; I can’t even start where,
Dusty covers, lost pages, judge the book!
Of all clichés this one I will never forget,
Passing through life betwixt and between,
In the end all you’re left with is regret,
Was I made […]
I am everything that I can be
So let this all just end for me
I’ve said my piece and played my part
And it’s set in stone; I’m faint of heart
This world grows crueler as each day dawns
Brutal and fit for kings not pawns
I am not one among that class
And I have not the will to last
I’m tired of this pain and hurt
And have no delusions of self worth
Regardless of the future pain
I wish not to wake again
I am of no consequence
No sung hero of grand event
Just this sorry bag of meat
Who finds living too […]
If this is what it takes
to show that I’m hurting
then let me die.
If this is what it takes
to show that I want you,
love you,
care for you,
then let me down.
It wouldn’t be the first time you let me down.
When I held the bottle of death,
you yelled, never wept.
Took your sweet time and left.
Gave excuses and never took the blame.
Never accepted being wrong, still it’s the same.
When I needed you,
you never came.
It’s always going to be the same.
So I’ll light another cigarette,
so the smoke will take the scream.
I’ll take the weed if it promises to take the pain,
the regret,
the memories.
Just forget,
they tried to say “You’ll get over […]
My best friend wrote this, while we were bullshitting, smoking a cig.
All she is,
is a midnight cigarette;
slowly burning,
like a heart attack.
Burning out,
on the flesh of her wrist,
leaving marks,
never to be kissed.
Her midnight smoke is burning,
and she choke.
Up the memories of somone long forgotton,
someone lost in her own thoughts.
“We’re all lying to the mirror, lying to ourselves.”
You’ve watched your baby girl grow up.
You’ve been there for her as life experiences knocked her over hundreds of times.
You’ve been there for her successes, and failures.
For her strongest and weakest moments.
But now she’s in high school.
She keeps things from you now.
Things like she lost her virginity to a senior.
She got pregnant and miscarried before the second month was over.
She started smoking and cutting herself.
She writes down that she hates you and her mother for never being able to understand in her journal, which she left in the hallway when she went to see her friends.
A 500-metre (1,600 ft) drop would take the train to 360 kilometres per hour (220 mph) close to its terminal velocity, before flattening out and speeding into the first of its seven slightly clothoid inversions.
Each inversion would have a smaller diameter than the one before in order to maintain 10g to passengers while the train loses speed.
After a sharp right-hand turn the train would enter a straight, where unloading of corpses and loading of new passengers could take place. more
I want to take it all away
Take back what I told you
It changes how you feel about me
I can see it in your eyes
No matter how much you deny
I can hear it in your tone
No matter how much you say no
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This is why I don’t
Tell people how I feel
They make assumptions
Most of them aren’t real
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And they don’t deserve the burden
It should be mine to bear
Still I can’t help wishing
That someone else would share
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Still I can’t help wishing
There was somebody out there
Who would hear all I have to say
And it wouldn’t change the way they thought of me
Or how they looked at me
Or how they acted […]
Hearts beats together as one
Brown eyes stare
Hand shivers at your embrane
Knees weaken
What, Why is this happen
Tears falls
A silent mumble
Falls slowly to the ground
Will you be there to lift me back up
No no you wont
These emotions, these feelings
Of solitude , of loneliness has overcome me
No clue nor understanding
What do you want of me
I am dead , cold ice cold
These emotions have caused murder
I died in solitude and alone
Hand-written 🙂
Gonna post some poems would love some feedback on them when they go up 🙂