Stop Telling Me Everything’s Gonna Get Better! If Everything Was Gonna Get Better, I Wouldn’t Be The Way I Am Now. Hurt. Depressed. Worthless..I Just Need To End It Hear. I Just Need Everything To Be Okay. Dead. If I Killed Myself I Wouldn’t Need To Worry About Anything. I Mean, No One Likes Me Anyways So What’s The Difference? Absolutely Nothing. This Is Just The Beginning..
My Name Is Cassandra And I’m 15 Years Old. I Sit Alone On My Bed, Looking At My Ceiling Everyday. Thinking To Myself That I’m Worthless And This Could, It Should Be The End For Me. I’m Picked On In High School And Usually I Just Can’t Take It Anymore. I Grab Blades, Knives, Whatever Is Sharp And Start To Cut My Wrists. Watching The Little Blood Coming From My Wrists. Being To Afraid To Go Deeper, To End My Life. I Think About Suicide All The Time. Maybe This Is It, Was What I Was Thinking. Maybe I Should Just End It Here! On […]
I’m torn to pieces right now. I’m going back to school in 2 days and I just wasn’t to kill myself already. I have SO much work to get back to and everyone at school hates me and says stuff about me and I’m just behind done. Home isn’t any better. And my self harm is gonna get worse i can tell. Goodnight everyone
I’m not like in the suicide mood but in the murder mood… probably I’m just being foolish and getting mad about something meaningless, but it fucking hurted.
And it hurted ’cause it was my younger brother the one who caused me the humiliation, it was his stupid fault that I had to go there and then when he was getting the carbage out he practically threw it at my face… may be I’m childish but it was so humiliating I just locked my room so I wont go out and kill him.
I keep falling for the stupid lies.
“I love you”
“We are going to be together forever”
“You are my world”
“I can’t live without you”
Bullshit. I fall for them every fucking time though. The thought of us being together and happy seems just in my reach, just over a small hill. But really it’s millions of miles away and I will never reach it. We will never reach it. I just want us both happy. Actually correction, I only care if he’s happy. At this point I really don’t care about myself. I don’t know why I keep falling for the lies. Is it because I want to be with […]
Hello! They say writing and sharing your experiences can be therapeutic, and in my case that is especially true. So, today I thought I’d take a moment to sit down and have a little chat with all of you.
My story really begins about 8-9 months ago. I was going through a rough time, I had just found out I have a lump in my spine. In the past years I have been diagnosed with:
Reynauds Disease
Fibromyalgia
Osteoporosis (in my neck)
Osteoarthritis (neck, again)
Heart Arrhythmia
Severe Insomnia (still […]
Death is calling I might pick up. Telling me come home.
Home where?
To the morgue?
With my friends?
Forever more?
What fate?
Shall i have?
Kinda getting sick of being trapped.
It’s time, I fly, goodbye, I die.
It’s now, I hang above the ground, with my necklace made of rope.
Death is calling I might pick up.
Telling me come home.
Home where?
To the Grave.
With my friends and family?
This offer is so tempting.
I, I, I wanna fly.
Maybe I’ll test it at great height.
I, I, I wanna swing,
Maybe I’ll test it from a tree.
I, I, I […]
I need to die, I don’t want it I need it. More than ever. I hate who I am, who I’ve been, and yet to become. My life is a curse and everyone around me will be effected if youdontgetmeoutofhere. If I cannot die…then ok. Take me too a woods, leave me there. Take away my brain so the thoughts will go, my eyes and ears so I won’t ever have anything to ruin again. Please, if my body must remain alive, remove my soul so I no longer have to be such a horrible being. Please, let me go.
Well here goes.
I guess you can say I have a pretty good life. Thinking about some of the things I have, many still have more troubles than me, but I can’t help feeling like this life I’m living, isn’t really mine at all. Do you know what I mean?
I mean sometimes, you would walk about, head high, laughing at all the fun things in life, and then suddenly you just crash. The clouds in your head are replaced by the dense fog, a fog that’s so heavy it makes you drag your feet as you walk down the hallways. This fog never lifts; it just […]
I just came home from going out with friends. Â Instead of my husband saying nice to see you, he calls me fat….the fattest woman he ever saw today and that I am an embarrassment. Â I am not sure I can do this anymore…I am sick of the most negative person in my life being my husband. Â I wish I can escape, but again he keeps on telling me I am too stupid to get a job. Â He’s right. I tried, I can’t. Â I am stuck and don’t have any place to go anymore. Â I just wish I was not such a coward. Â I would love […]
Hi I guess I’m new here.
I’ve wanted to kill myself for a while (I’m 13), and I finally found a site that I think might help me.
I would, but I’m too much of a coward to
But since I won’t I’m too much of a coward.
I just hate everything
Can’t stand life anymore
Dammit!!!! I feel so fucking low!! I cant even control my mood right now.. I started feeling really lonely today and I tried to kill  it by calling people to see what theyre doing but everyone is fucking busy! So I just broke down… I tried to stY strong. Ive been coping so well.. and they dont know. They dont know anything…
Sometimes life can get pretty exhausting. And yes, that is an understatement. My stack of homework pushed aside for the moment, I try to relax.
The only light in my room is my lamp from my desk, which creates a low yellow glow. The only sounds are the hum of my computer, the typing of the keys, and my cat cleaning herself. In this quiet environment, she can be a racket. Especially when she purrs. I normally bring her with me when I need the comfort. I just want to feel wanted tonight, even if it’s only coming from a cat.
Her purr sounds like kernels popping, vibrating […]
I just come across this site and thought I want to contribute.
i have recently got back from hospital after my third attempt to overdose. As a child my parents were violent and drug abusesers, I was in care for a while made homeless twice by my mother. Beaten, emotionally abused. I lived with an auntie for a big chunk of time who also abandoned me at 13. My dad left the house when I was 16 leaving me to look after my 14 year old brother. My mum come out of prison and set the house on fire. As I have grown up I have […]
Ive been trying pretty hard so keep my head up. And I have been for about a week now. But today my mood just dropped. Im pretty sure that its because I havent been eating like I should for a few days. And Im so irritated now. Im weak and tired. And This headache is quite bothersome… Im sure Ill pick back up in a couple days..
The only time I feel truly worthless anymore is when I can’t find the words to comfort someone who is suffering. When I see someone who is truly suffering, a beautiful soul who refuses to see the truth and they hurt themselves mentally and physically, it pains me. I hate myself and the English language for not providing the words and the wisdom to help them.
I am not pretty,
I am not smart,
I am not beautiful,
and I self harm.
I have a cold heart
don’t have nothing to give,
You should move on,be
with someone who isn’t shit.
I am so blank,
I am emotionally drained,
I am a cutter,
My clothes are blood stained.
Not worth the wait,
Not worth your tears,
I think you know that
but had to make it clear.
You can’t waste time,
over someone like me,
I may seem strong,
but inside I’m weak.
I don’t know the time
I really have,
I’m scared I’ll hurt You,
I’m scared like hell!
You can’t live your life
in constant […]
I’ve been silently suffering for a while now. I have had thoughts about killing myself several times, but they mostly hit late at night, which is when i feel most alone. I’ve pushed everyone in my life out and i’ve secluded myself from a lot, but not on purpose, it just kind of happened. I’ve lost a lot of people, and i feel like if i just did it and wasn’t such a coward i’d be in a much better place. I’m afraid of doing it because i don’t know what happens next, but i’m sure whatever happens next after that, is a lot better […]
it’s been nearly a month or more since i last did it… until today.
see, the only reason i hadn’t done it was because my mum took away all my sharp objects and although i had tried using other things they just weren’t sharp enough. not enough to create drops of blood.
i felt myself craving the pain, i had to find a way to let all these feelings out!
so i simply found new razors.
i did it a few hours ago, what a fucking relief and it wasn’t even too deep. but i crave more, more, fucking more.
i wish i had an exacto knife so […]
I went to bed last night with a date.
February 6th.
But I woke up this morning. And I felt awful.
My head ached and the first thing I did was regurgitate my meal from yesterday morning
I think if I work hard to get my things together today, I might leave tonight.