Why me? Why do I have to be that one person who is the friend that could go missing and NOBODY would notice or care? Why is my bestfriend so much better than me? Why do I have to be ugly? Why do I have to be FAT? I workout so much, for no results. Why don’t I have any good qualities???
WHY?
I know that this is probably a stupid thing to ask but can anybody give me any tips and tricks on sleeping? My mom doesn’t want me to get sleeping pills because she thinks that I’ll get addicted to them even though I’ve never had a previous drug addiction, but anyways.. she keeps telling me to search up natural remedies but none of them are working. I go to bed at either 1 or 2 in the morning everyday which lets me get about 3 to 4 hours of sleep on weekdays so if you couldn’t already tell, that’s a big issue.. especially when I’m […]
Well I made it out alive once more, not sure how I feel about that. Actually just woke up. After more shit was thrown on my already full plate, I lost it and raged like I tend to do. So after being up for 3 days partying, rippin the scooter down the highway at 120+ enough alcohol and other things that would kill a herd of elephants, sleeping for another day. I woke up, but instead of being pissed off because I did wake like usually do, I woke up and thought of the people that I’ve met here that have showed me love […]
It’s hard for me to sleep. It’s 1:04 AM here and I am still awake. My sleep patterns are getting weird. And I am sure I won’t sleep until 5:00 Am. I just lay awake at night, losing myself in thought and contemplating my doom and misfortune. I think I need to get myself on sleeping pills. Any suggestions?!!??
Hey everybody, this is going to be short for a change lol. I just want to say that when I post or comment I can be long winded, sorry for that. I hope at no time that my words are ever taken out of context, or come off as offensive. I tend to say what’s on my mind and here I try and take the time to word everything just right. I have met some of the most extraordinary people here who have talked me in from the edge and for that I’m so thankful. I just want […]
Reeses cups with nuts, reeses cups plain ???
Live fast, die young, and leave a good lookin corpse. That’s the way we always lived our lives growing up, some of us succeeded, some of us ( like myself ) didn’t. Oh I lived fast, ( still am ) but I didn’t die young, and let’s face it, the GOOD lookin corpse things went right out the window years ago. I grew up and still live in Detroit. Growing up we didn’t have anything but that didn’t matter cause we really didn’t need anything, hell there was no such thing as cable, or video games, we had hot wheels, the […]
Well hey lovely people of suicide Project. I haven’t been here in awhile if you have noticed if any of you know who I am.
So awhile back I made a post about I Dye my hair. Its my self distraction from self harm. People seemed to like that so I think I’m going to make a journal hopefully everyday or maybe a cpl days or once a week in not sure yet. But I’m here for all of you. I wont judge because everyone needs a friend and you shouldn’t feel alone. So if I make a journal for you guys it’ll be self distractions […]
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so the other day I was thinking about leaving my husband but now I can’t ……WHY?????? BECAUSE MY MOTHERFUCKING PHONE BROKE…. so anyway for me to leave is gone no way to contact my family to get me a plain or get my own tickets no way of calling a cab or anything how why why…… wow so god works in weird ways but really break the only thing that gave me solace…really…..I hate my life really bad…. now if I do still leave I have two wait two weeks . and spend money I don’t have I literally fucked and it’s snowing it April […]
I keep thinking about what I might’ve done in my past to deserve a life like this, and I realized that I screwed up alot, nothing really intentionally. So by my account I should be even with the house, debt paid in full. It seems that not the case, so now I’m beginning to wonder if this is just the hand I’ve been dealt and I just gotta play it out ??? Like I said, I’m no angel but as an adult I’ve grown and always tried to learn from my mistakes, I try to help, and give, […]
I went to see uncle Tom, because our sicknesses are the same.
I never thought of that before, is genetics to blame ???
So I asked how do describe me, because words I can’t find.
He looked at me and smiled, and said you have an un-quiet mind.
An un-quiet mind ??? I’ll be damned you’re right.
That’s always been my problem, no peace in sight.
From the time I wake up until the time I go to sleep, and all the time in-between
All of the noises and voices, I just wanna scream.
But screaming won’t […]
I have been a cluster survivor since 1984, episodic for the first 25 years and chronic for the last 6, since 2009.
Nothing can be done for the pain …… main aim is to control the attacks (4-6 a day at the moment) and the duration.
Suicidal thoughts are never far away ….. but every day and sometimes several times a day ….. I get through it to fight another battle with this terrible illness.
I surround myself with pictures of the people I love and all the reasons to stay alive ……. and for me it works, well up to now anyway.
Constant stress […]
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Today I skimmed and read and skimmed and read hundreds upon hundreds upon hundreds of texts that my ex and I sent over the last year. They’re just there. In my phone. So much love. So much communication.
I know I need to delete it. I know I need to move on. What is wrong with me???
Idk if this is the way I have always been or that this is the way I have become. I have so little to offer the world, so little skill or ability which in many ways makes me a worthless loser.
that wouldn’t be bad if I wasn’t such a monster inside. As the feeling of helplessness build coupled with lack of connection, and on top of that people acting towards me like I’m some sort of a freak, it created/encouraged the monster within.
It was the copping mechanism which has further ruined my life. As the problems were put off to a later age, the monster […]
Ever want to walk past one of your co workers and just slap them in the back of the head as you go by???? I do I do!!! I cant stand that little sweet voice, hiding an evil mean person, that people don’t see past, because she is little and cute. All I ever hear is her talking crap about everyone. And for some reason she now thinks she is my boss even though I have been there 3 years longer. Driving me nuts
Couldn’t find one, at any rate…??
what the fuck my mind must be really mess up shit I’m already suicidal then last night I dreamed of me dying or getting killed it was so real can’t remember but I know it was to do with my heart tho and I was on the floor ? Heart attack I ain’t looking to live that’s long shit I no we all die but when you start dreaming and living it u start to ask your self is this my destiny to die early ??
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