ive always felt ugly. i am fat and ugly. i recently lost a lot of weight. i went from weighing 180lbs to weighing 145lbs but now i weigh 160lbs and i am just so ugly and weak. food is my weakness. i love food but i hate it at the same time. this happens all the time. i lose the weight but then i gain a lot of weight, i dont know why. i hate the way i look. it depresses me, it really really depresses me. i cry about it all the time. my body is a big issue of mine. i just cant […]
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so my father told he should never been with my mum and she’s ugly and she was a mistake in his life
idk why he told me that !! and he told me that he hate us and should’ve gone long time ago..
idk how i was counting on him a lot of things even my college and stuff ..
and now i’ve left with nothing.. and i finally knew he doesn’t even care and want me to be failure and sad
I can’t even take a breath without feeling this pain in my heart ..
this life is too long i can’t keep living with […]
I just cant go on.
I cant feel anything and i dont want to feel anything.
I feel worthless and hopeless.
I have no one to talk to and i dont even know if i want to talk to anyone.
I just cant go on…
I’m just so tired.
I never had that feeling . The need to die. I always cope with things, and pretend everything is okay but it’s not. I’m having a fight with my best friend. Everything in my life is so fake. My friends are fake and i hate my body so much. I have literally no one to talk to. My dad is somewhere around the world with his girlfriend and mom is working all the time. My birthday is coming up this Friday and i feel so depressed and lonely.
Someone wrote here, “i wish i could achieve the peace of death without […]
So I’m the type of person who is super neat and clean and always does work before play. I’m really good about getting my homework etc. done ahead of time, and pretty much love to work really hard with everything I do and tend to be an overachiever. I have had a bad day or two every now or then where I just slack off because I’m not in the mood or my depression is just getting the best of me, but its never held be back like this before. my rooms a mess, I haven’t touched my homework in a week or so and […]
insomnia has 4 syllables, 4 vowels, 4 consonants…it’s 4 in the morning. I take enough sleeping pills to down a bus full of toddlers, I’ve taken 37 tonight….this is beginning to be an average number…not in a desparate attempt to die, but to sleeeeeeppppppp sleep sleep sleep sleeeeep…I cannot sleep. for 3 hours I tried…tv off lights off dark. silence. eyes closed, as if I laid completely still for long enough I could trick myself to sleep…..insomnia is crazy. there have been nights that I’ve just fuckin broke and wept, wept for sleep…a few days in and i’m thinking maybe I am actually asleep but […]
Ok i know that all of y’all are probably tired of my lame ass story. I am too. I wish that everything just wasn’t so messed up. Today i felt like everything was alright and then i started thinking and i really it’s not. Yeah i know everybody has their problems but i want a break. I want to be able to be free. Trapped by my own mind. Shame. I am not look for a shoulder to cry on anymore. I will cry my tears but i won’t ask for help. I will do what i do best and hide behind a fake […]
Hi, i’ve never really posted on anywhere like this before but i don’t really know what else to do.
I’ve contemplated suicide so many times throughout my life and recently everyone feels like it’s finally coming to a climax, as if ive already accepted that i’m going to die soon, and i want to go out on my own terms.
I’ve been struggling with multiple health issues which make everyday life horrendous, i’m constantly spaced out and in pain almost every waking minute, it’s too much to take.
I’m also incredibly lonely, not even my family speaks to me unless it’s to start an argument or take out […]
I wanted to talk about something im having a problem with…friendship. I have one friend i’ve known her for most of my life she’s really great. We got into a fight over a rumor passed around school that I was messing around with her boyfriend. She beileved the rumors and said alot of hurtful things like, go cut yourself and no one loves you. She knows i harm myself its a sore spot for me and i instantly started crying. This happened during school so it drawed in a crowd and i felt like my whole world was crumbling around me. As if ive […]
and it is depressing the hell out of me.
the last few days it has been cloudy, chilly, and raining off and on. i actually really like fall, but i’m light sensitive, and a lack of it can make me more depressed & lethargic. no, i don’t own a light box and i can’t get one unfortunately.
i really want to enjoy this fall, but so far i can’t. i’m just really down. it’s coming up on the one-year anniversary of when my family broke apart, and i’m not taking it well. though it’s better having some distance between now and when it happened, and though that […]
When it comes to cutting, since ive seen a lot of posts about it lately. Assuming not cutting in anyway that would require medical attention (basically a suicide attempt) is it really all that bad? I myself use it as a coping method, i know its not entirely preferable and i try not to if i can avoid it but i feel like its really no different than lighting up a cigarette. Or any other destresser bad habit.
Though i am curious about those who use it as a way to grab attention. I kinda dont get it unless its a silent cry for help kinda […]
My friend has just tried to commit because he likes me and i basically lead him on (I didn’t mean to).
If he succeeds then I don’t want to live anymore, I can’t handle the guilt of being responsible for another person ending their life. But I’m scared, I want a relatively painless way to die.
Update: he was unsuccessful, luckily. But I don’t know how to support him and be there for him as a fringed without him getting the wrong idea?
This past weekend seemed miserable much of the time but later last night i had another good moment and talk with the guy I love. Im trying not to takke it personally. So he doesnt believe I’m really attracted to him because I’m the only person who is and he feels shitty about himself for being fat. He has a lot against being fat, and is stuck on society’s opinions of stick thin equals beauty. So he showed me pictures of himself when he was 200 lbs vs being 290-300 as I’ve known him. He does look a bit different but hes still amazingly gorgeous […]
so my daughter also has depression, maybe other things, but she is only 13 and really just started her journey. i feel like i have no room to breathe. no room for me. i know it sounds selfish, but i have struggled since 8 or 9 as she has.i have threats and attempts of suicide in my life. she posts all this stuff on facebook, everybody calls me. what am i doing?…do more…do this…what about this. i have had to put all my treatment for my depression and fibromyalgia and neuropathy on hold because i am disabled and don’t work. all gas in car, […]
im living on borrowed time here because i cant find the courage inside of me to commit suicide, and its tearing me apart. i want everyone to forget that i exist. i wish i could live in the shadows so that if i died, no one would notice and i wouldnt hurt anyone. i havent attempted anything but im scared that ill fail and ill have to live with everyone knowing my secret. my depression is my secret and ive been living with it for three years. it started when i was fourteen and i felt the depression grow with me. as i got older […]
i fucking hate people its no fucking use no matter what i do people always think its the worst thing i cant explane it because no one wants to believe me or they all think im fucking crazy. i have no choice ether people are going to kill me or i just have to take my own life that’s it. my mom told me i can be happy i just have to choose it but i don’t have a choice people are always going to think what they are going to think and i cant change there minds because everyone hates me. no one cares about […]
i was supposed to be dead by now but the ATF system was down so i couldn’t buy a gun then i went the next day and it was up again and i bought the gun but they didn’t have .22 bullets so i went to another store and it turns out that there is a shortage of .22 bullets in the us right now i call 10 different stores and finally find a dicks that has some in stock and i go and get them. a couple hours later i prepare for my beautiful death and take out the bullets and line them up […]
today was supposed to be my death day i was jittery and scared but i knew that something would happen to push me to where i needed to be to go through with it… and i was right! something happens every day that reminds me why i want to die. So i got my gun from bass pro shop and then i figure out they don’t have the ammo for the gun so i drive to a dicks and they don’t have it either so i go to another dicks and i finally find the right caliper bullets and i get home and i start […]
I started freshman year of high school with slight signs of depression. I was at a stage were i hate myself. I didn’t like anything about myself. I had plenty of friends, but none who i felt i could confide in. I felt alone and worthless.
I told a few friends about how I felt, but i only told them vaguely. They all would go on rants about how amazing i was and that in no way was i worthless. I never believed them.
School started and it was getting harder. I was starting to develop an anxiety disorder. Before then i had never felt […]
About 8 or 9 months ago i knew someone and i really started to like her (She is from another country very far from mine), that really changed me to a better person, but more depressive either, i’m a 18 years guy, ugly, boring and depressive, never had any girlfriend in my life, no one loves me, and i’m not being exaggerated, my mom don’t give shit about me and my father is a drug addicted since he had 13 years old, i grew up alone, without friends and without importance to nobody, so for a long time i dedicated my life to studies, i […]