I’m not to sure why I’m still hanging around to be honest maybe I need to find the courage to try again and plan properly this time ? Isit our destiny to die early I feel like iv lived two life times but I’m still young but I feel so old can people like us recover from being rock bottom depressed anxious suicidal and even attempted ? Or should we give up what r we really fighting for ? A 9 to 5 job is that living ? Do we live to work or work to live ? Why are we this way is there […]
Tag:
anxious
I am 63 years old. I was diagnosed with chronic depression almost 30 years ago. I used to be a musician but I’ve been out of work for a long time now. My wife is a nurse. She doesn’t like me anymore. She has her two dogs and they’re what she likes, not me. I can’r seem to do anything but annoy her.
I have no money. I can’t go anywhere, although the best thing would be for us to separate. She’s always giving me dirty looks and acting nervous and anxious with me. All I want is for us to get along but she seems […]
I know someone on here had a post similar to this but after you’ve had trauma attempted suicide are depressed anxious self harm have suicidal thoughts etc can you really come back from all that ? being the happy out going person u once was ? Or are u pass the point of no return the damage is already done kind of thing game over
how many people have actually won the battle to live a so called normal life?
and how many people have commit suicide what’s the odds I say suicide wins by far what’s everyone view on the subject ?
I guess I’m just trying to wind up the courage to try again had enough of this bull shit anyways being depressed anxious ain’t left the house in days struggle to get out of bed this isn’t life for a 26 year old I would rather be dead I no people have worst lives then I do but iv just mad a mess of things that can’t be fixed and the loneliness is to much to bare anymore hope I get the courage soon
Iv really had enough now I hate waking up everyday I’m not living life im just surviving each day and that’s a battle life isn’t for everyone and I’m one of them people life will carry on if im here or not so what’s the point the world is a horrible place let alone feeling lonely depressed anxious need to build up the courage to try again
God dealt me the shit hand really I didn’t asked to be born a fuck up iv come to terms with the first born child is always really a mistake having to stumble though life trying to find your purpose or meaning then you have all the life experience that mess you up and make you self harm depressed and anxious about everything then the doctors want to give you meds just to keep you on a level or think they can fix you but can you really fix something that was broken to begin with don’t see the point in the struggle anymore I feel […]
I wish I could be myself around other people. Unfortunately, ‘myself’ is a complete piece of shit. And while there are things I can do to moderate that, I can’t see it ever changing.
So my life is artificial. I can’t let anyone else see who or what I really am. What goes through my head. Because it’s fundamentally unacceptable. I am completely alone. I can’t let anyone see the fear. Because if they see the fear, they might start asking what I’m so afraid of. What is so awful that I feel so anxious about?
So my whole life is an act. It has been for […]
I’m angry. I’m angry and being anxious by being trapped. Angry at my traumatic meaninglessness of a life. I’m not truly suicidal or ugly just anxious. I have emotional trigger points. I have mental blocks I’m so furious at them furious at my helplessness that i channel it inwards and call it depression. I have ideas and i told someone if I’m just mediocre at half of them I’ll be a millionaire. I believe that. I just want to get the fuck out of my own way. Ive lived in pain, helplessness, and hopelessness far to fucking long. Tired of having so many exposed buttons. […]
Just tried some impromptu exposure therapy. I have pretty severe anxiety. I cant remember the last time i did something as simple as shop at multiple places without having full out or precursor panic attack. Im pretty happy so far today I went to multiple places without being anxious. Gotta take the simple small victories when you get them.
I’m (supposedly) feeling less depressed. And yet why can’t I function any better? For the first time ever I’m late with turning in a (creative) writing assignment. I’m so embarrassed and even more stressed/anxious in that I don’t even know how I’ll get it done. I’m a good writer, but I just haven’t felt creative since my fiance and I broke up. Maybe painting I could do, but words and plot require thinking. I can write a beginning, even a beginning I like, but then I’m stuck. The only piece I wrote a significant amount of words to I now hate because of the direction […]
I’ve been crying, cried myself to sleep. I feel so scared, so anxious and overwhelmed. I feel emotionally drained and I don’t know how to do anything.
I’m scared I can’t function enough to be in school right now, I can’t stand another setback. But I already missed one class, and haven’t even started the homework due on thursday, and I don’t know how I’m going to get through the semester without my stats professor seeing me cry (I want to try to get a recommendation from him). I don’t know how I’m going to get my homework done. I feel too scared to think clearly, […]
Mornings seem to be the worst.
At any rate I’m feeling upset, angry? that not just that my ex gave up on us, but that she (probably, I might be simply imagining that she feels that way) believes she had no choice. That there was no chance for us. That we (she?) wasn’t healthy enough.
I don’t believe this at all. I do not believe my being depressed and anxious means I can’t be in a relationship, or have a healthy one. My ex and I had this one issue, serious enough for her to leave me, but- even she said this- we were amazing in every other […]
So, I found out that my family find out about me. They find out how vulnerable I am. They found that I’m not mentally healthy.
And I find out that they find out quite a time ago.
I should be something ; angery, nervous, anxious. I can also cry, i can be relived I can be worried but I have no feelings. Neither this thing hurt me nor it gave comfort to me. I’m exactly like I was a minute before. Caught in an argument, they confronted, I refused and went to my room. No talk.
It’s kinda funny situation. 😀 Her child is in pain, […]
Today was horrible. Let’s start of by saying I met up with a old friend and we smoked a couple bowls and I got really stoned . I stopped smoking because it turned into paranoia. I would just get really anxious and my heart would start racing . I had compulsive thoughts and so much more . And that’s exactly what happened to me today . I thought it would be different . I felt so awkward with her . I have no friends so I thought this would be a good day . Then I ate a lot of food because I was anxious […]
I think that I’m really not cut out for life.When I think of my future, I see myself alone. Not because that I suck at doing stuff but because of my anxiety. I am always scared to do things out of my comfort zone, I panic fast, I get angry in little time, I speak before I think and that I am a pessimist. I unknowingly ruin relationships with other people because of these. I wonder if I can get life through with this. I have put all my efforts in changing myself, even just one step at a time but still to no avail, […]
Just a dumb rant for the day.
I wake up in the morning feeling anxious. It gets so bad I feel physically ill. This causes me to miss a lot of work because I wouldn’t be able to focus on anything, and I’m not feeling well. I miss work from this, plus the days I’m sick from other reasons. So it adds up. T and Z believe I’m faking because I can appear fine today and be out tomorrow and come back the next day. They don’t know it’s from anxiety though. I just tell them I’m sick. They wouldn’t understand if I told them the truth. You could tell me to […]
So, I thought I should give an update on the ‘Jehova’s Witness’ who are trying to kill me.
The year is coming to an end and the court date is drawing near. You know what that means? More threats. They want me dead as in yesterday.
Well… Whatever… A part of me doesn’t give a shit anymore.
Anyway, the harassment and threats have escalated. Since they can’t do it themselves, they have their relatives and church members do the dirty work for them. I’m in hell.
Remember I mentioned that 2 guys were shot dead a few weeks back? Well, it turns out those 2 guys were among the […]
I said i wasnt gonna come on here but i dont know what the fuck im doing because im going to a dance with a nice boy tonight but im almost crying right now because i think i look fucking stupid and i dont even wanna go to the dance and i have to meet his parents before it so his mom can take pictures and if they analyze me they’ll probably notice my wrists and i dont want them to and this boy deserves someone better who isnt anxious like i am
I fucking hate sundays. Well I fucking hate that sundays have to end cause I really hate mondays.
I have a lot of papers to do and I should have delivered one of them this weekend. I’m lost. My mind isn’t working and I’m having a lot of anxiety right now. I’m so sick of this. Fuck you universe, just kill me already and stop fucking with me.
Fuck the sundays and the mondays what I really hate is myself.
I hate you little piece of shit. Always sad, always anxious. You have a awesome life why can’t you enjoy it.
And stop crying. Just go make […]