The whole backstory is coming soon but it will take me hours to write, so I just wanted to put this out there right now. I’m 15, and have been getting harassed to my face and behind my back by the same group of boys for about a year. I’ve tried EVERY option of dealing with them in ethical ways, and nothing works. No matter how many people tell me I’m smart, or funny, or kind, I can’t believe it. I try, but I just can’t. These boys have stolen every ounce of pride and confidence I have. I get that feeling of my chest […]
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I haven’t told anyone about cutting myself and how I think of killing myself everyday I was depressed many months ago and I told one of my friends and she helped me she went through the same thing and it’s been a long time that I cut myself and yesterday I cut myself I have a few friends who know I cut myself before so I haven’t told anyone about this and I dont think I want to it’s just who do I turn to there’s one person I want to go to that knows I was depressed before and that I cut myself the […]
I can’t do this anymore. There’s no point in living if you don’t feel alive. For as long as I can remember I’ve been fighting depression and struggling with poverty and I just don’t care anymore. I’ve had nothing but horrible, humiliating, miserable life experiences. My biological family is beyond dis functional. I don’t really have friends just acquaintances. The only man I love hates me and wants nothing to do with me. I went to college and still can’t get a decent job. My best friend in college died. I have Major Depression, PTSD, and Agoraphobia. I am physically repulsive and it would take […]
Well, here i am, back again after a year or so. I left just after the lonelyplatypus incident, anyone find out if she was OK? Nice to see some of you still alive here, and I hope those that aren’t are in a happier place. To everyone else, hello, and it’s a pleasure to make your acquaintances.
There’s a silence in the room,
I don’t speak quite like you do.
You got my fingers crossed,
But I’ll catch myself and I’ll wish you off.
And I never thought the words you’d cast would hurt so much.
For that, well I won’t look back.
And I never thought the one you trust would stab your back,
I guess it’s not so bad.
There’s a window in my room,
I can’t see clear like you do.
I won’t move my mouth and I’ll stand up straight just to push you out.
So I can see your insides out,
And figure you out.
And I never thought […]
If you had the one chance to meet your past self, may it be your 5-year old or 12-year old, or your last year self, which age would it be? And what would you tell him/her?
For me, if I could meet my 12 year old self, I would tell her,
“Be happy. There’s no need to be so sad… It won’t solve anything nor is it of any use. Smile, because everything will be just fine. When you’re as big as me you’ll look back and realize the beauty is much more meaningful compared to the pain.”
So I went to my psychiatrist last Thursday. Got a new script for vyvanse 50mg and a refill on my ativan 1mg 3 times a day. And he doubled my wellbutrin which seems to be working. Idk anyway first time taking a prescribed stimulant and fuck the vyvanse is strong. I couldn’t get it till Friday because of insurance crap needing pre auth. Anyway so I ate breakfast on Thursday skipped lunch and turned in early with no dinner. Finally got the vyvanse and took one at like 2 o’clock cause wanted to see how it was. That kept me up till like 5 am. […]
they where nice but basically said I should talk to my therapist and that assisted suicide is illegal. It’s not there fault. Exit International has gotta be careful because the government is always on there back.
I know that Exit International mainly supports euthanasia for the terminally ill, but Philip Nitshcke is passively in favor of it for anyone who wishes to die.
Porn will be legalized in Saudi Arabia before euthanasia is allowed for the mentally ill.
Everything has been a downward’s spiral. I don’t really want to do anything anymore, I’m too sad. I don’t want to go to work, I don’t want to pack my things for going back to school next week, I don’t want to leave my hometown, but I don’t want to stay. It’s like I need to get away from here because I’m more hurt than not over recent events, but I don’t have anything waiting for me at school either. Unless you count my ex who probably won’t want me back anyway because I gained weight this summer. Nothing to look forward to, nothing to […]
All I ever want is to go back to feeling normal. But I haven’t felt normal since I was 5. My dad killed himself when I was 6, and my mum remarried. When I was 8, my stepdad began to sexually abuse me, all the way through to the age of 17. I self harmed and was seriously depressed throughout this whole ordeal. The abuse happened almost every day, in every room of the house. I’m 19 now and he is in prison, but I can’t get away from the mental, physical and emotional scars and trauma that I’m left with. I want to feel […]
Is it normal to still feel sluggish 2 days after a 2 day drinking/pot smoking binge?
by wndozh8er
written by wndozh8er
is been nearly 2 days and I still feel sluggish, like I wanna sleep all day. Ugh still guess I’m detoxing but my health anxiety is coming back. I’m so afraid I did perminate damage.
This was my best friend’s account. She took her own life back in June. I recovered it while going through search history. This will probably be the only post I make on her account, but I need to say something.
why? Just why? What makes a person want to commit suicide? I need answers. This has weighed on me since the funeral and I need closure.
So I got my beer on Thursday. It was cooers light so it wasn’t as strong as I wanted. Around midnight, I decided that I’m gonna see if I could commit suicide by train. Drunk, I walked to the railroad tracks then headed right down them, waiting for a train to come. My love was on the phone with me the entire time. I fell several times during all this. With no train in sight, I began sobering up enough to were I didn’t think I could go though with it and decided to go to my dads instead (which was on the way). I […]
I recently heard, in audio precepts, a book I had long sought in my adolescence called Harnessing Your Emotions by Andrew Wommack. Although this is a Christian take on psychology, it did help me realize that our emotions are controled by our thoughts not the other way around. This in turn has aliviated me of social anxieties, personality disorders and psychological ailments. The populous runs with the idea of psychology that our cirumstances dictate how we should feel and act which becomes our excuse for destructive behaviour.
For those who struggle to smile or get out of bed, hearing that “you choose to be happy or […]
Why movies are better than reality ? Why movie is better than reality ? Why reality is boring ?
by niki
written by niki
Why movies are better than reality / real life / real world ?
Why movie is better than reality / real life / real world ?
Why reality is boring ?
What puzzles me the most is human’s mind / human’s brains and imagination better than reality ( human’s fantasy is better than reality )
for example:
just look at the movies, novels, comics, games, books, , animations (anime / manga), science fiction (sci-fi), fantasy , like Star Wars, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Narnia, X-Men, Marvels & DC universe / movies , The Avengers , Final Fantasy, Kingdom Hearts, Swords Art Online, Naruto, Bleach, […]
I have recently been having some pretty intense nightmares, including waking dreams, which are the most horrific series of events, emotions, and imagery that persist after you wake up. The thing that makes these dreams so incredibly petrifying is the relief you would normally feel upon waking up is shattered by the persistence of the thing you fear the most appearing in reality. Sometimes they fizzle out quickly, alternatively there are times I lay in bed for over an hour trying to figure out my reality, it’s as if I completely dissociate from reality, and I am unable to distinguish things that clearly aren’t real […]
I’ve been on and off in this site for the past four years. I remember creating and deleting a couple of accounts, writing and trashing my posts and I have been doing the same with my life too. I cry, cry and cry and then force myself to go back to my pathetic life thinking it might actually get better someday. I break down into pieces and then collect myself and find a little courage to get it going. I am already tired of repeating the same thing over and over again when its not going to take me anywhere at all. I have lost […]
I’m not evil or I don’t hurt anyone but the dark has pieces of me I can never get back so Im trying to get it back but it feels like im falling back into the hole of the darkness with the depression and loneliness im bringing upon myself I don’t want this for myself I just feel like im drowning in my own head but no one can hear me….it really is a filthy goddamn world we live in its so much pain in the world and people cover it up with a smile.
I’m struggling with my self confidence. I feel so ugly and I hate my body. My ex boyfriend watched porn behind my back, huge tit porn. I don’t have big boobs and It has made me hate myself so much. I wish I had big boobs, I wish someone would love me for my body
Hello. I’m just an average, lost young girl, who has been through some things. And I just discovered this site and I couldn’t respond to each and every one of you so I made an account just to say this – please don’t do it. Please.
I’ve been there myself and the only thing stopping me was the thought about how much it would hurt everyone. I’m serious, you may think nobody cares about you but I’m 100% positive, that there are people whose lives you’ve touched even if you don’t notice it. I lost my father to suicide. These past years I lost two of […]