I wish I would die, that my body would just give out or some freak accident will happen to take me out. I’ve wondered if I could go to a bad area at night and coax someone into shooting me in the head. I feel like placing personal ads saying it’s a last ditch effort before I kill myself, because people need to be taught a fucking lesson about not completely fucking with others feelings.
Tag:
bad
Im 23 and im tired of fighting this battle. I can no longer fill my head with the idea that it will get better. Im struggling everyday fighting back the tears. I seeked helped taken meds and yet i still feel like im living in hell. I think i will be done soon or hope i have the strength to end it. I feel bad for the ones i leave behind but enough is enough. My heart just wasnt made for this world. Its terrible we are put through this mental agony. I feel for everybody out there dealing with demons.
it sucks having no real friends 🙁 I love all the people I meet in the internet, here, but at the end of the day we are alone. I live in a big city and its depressing. everyone has a great life and knowing I don’t its depressing. my so called friend called me a ‘deppresive person’ . I told him my story and it seems he doesn’t understand. I feel so alone. suicide I want that that carbon monoxide. im thinking about it over and over again. what do you believe after death? what are your beliefs? I’ve been told suicide is sin and […]
Hello, everyone.
I am a miserable person, I hate my life. I know nothing will ever be perfect for me. Pointless. I am nothing more than a catfish, ugly on the outside and ugly on the inside.
I can’t go anywhere, I can’t see anyone, I can’t do anything. I am so tired of being so despised.
Sometimes I think I can do this, I can live like a normal person, but I can’t.
Happiness is so fleeting.
I long for that little rush of adrenaline that comes from someone loving you, but when they find out who I am they always leave me. Even if I tell you too […]
I feel so bad. I feel empty. I don’t know what the purpose for me living is. The only reason I haven’t killed myself yet is because my parents would be very sad if I died. But why should I just keep living because of them? After all, they’re part of the reason I want to kill myself. I just don’t know what to do.
It’s been a while since I last logged in here. A long while. A few years. I don’t know what made me think of it now but I remembered it and how at the time, writing helped.
The depression is back. It never really left I guess, but after I was put on meds I was on those for about two years and became a semi functional member of society. Then I was taken back off them, and I had gotten myself to an okay place and kept trundling on living day by day doing anything to put a bit of sunshine into life. But it’s […]
I was planning on dying this week. But I didn’t have the balls to do it, or the opportunity really. So now I’m alive, I haven’t exactly decided to live but yet here I am. Now I have no idea how to go forward. Work starts on Monday and I’m gonna have to be happy. can’t really be depressed around little kids. I’m scared. So scared to move on. I worked for a summer camp and did horrible, the lady implied that I shouldn’t be working with kids, yet here I am. All the jobs I have lined up for the fall are with kids. […]
My life really isn’t that bad. i wasted 8 years in the military and was suicidal almost everyday for the last year that i spent in. i was always on some kind of anti depressant or a tranquilizer. once i got out i stopped my medications and i feel better yes. but i still have the thought on a daily basis that I’m tired of my life and feeling unaccomplished with everything that i have going on. its a struggle, i have a girlfriend, i go to school, and i medicinally use cannabis. but i cannot seem to every get out of the slump, I’ve […]
I’m sorry, she’s a good person but I’m pissed off and frustrated at her right now! I asked her again tonight when I can get my own Visa card so I can buy the peaceful pill eHandbook. She got on her high horse and said “this is a bad book I can’t do it”. I said “how is it a bad book?” She said “I did research and it gives you contacts”. I said so? I want a freaking book using my own money and I got freedom of information!!!!!!!!! She said “your crazy”. I said – let me buy the damn book! She said […]
and yet I am, time after time, just sitting and rotting away in my dingy apartment. I read, and view all types of media and see how vast and spectacular this world is yet I am confined to a mental prison that I cannot be free of. Why was I born like this? Why do I interpret and perceive things the way I do? I’m always asking questions, to which a complete answer will never be revealed. Sometimes I feel like I’ve experienced my good and bad fair share of things, and that everything I feel from now on will just be dwindled, lesser versions […]
And so, maybe I should say it
I repent for today
Until for the next day
Where I’m just going to go play
And hopefully, I won’t repent in this way
It was just a bad mix with, the onion
To balance, perspicacity to thine situation
Humbling, always in discourse from within
Crumbling
Until for the next day
Where I’m just going to go play
And hopefully, I won’t have to repent in this way
…
You see, it involves of a kind of lonesome; me
Maybe more, of a solitude
Maybe, like a Weezing, wandering alone
In a room
I hope that it went okay, and that you did become
The Moon, and the Sun
There’s a silence in the room,
I don’t speak quite like you do.
You got my fingers crossed,
But I’ll catch myself and I’ll wish you off.
And I never thought the words you’d cast would hurt so much.
For that, well I won’t look back.
And I never thought the one you trust would stab your back,
I guess it’s not so bad.
There’s a window in my room,
I can’t see clear like you do.
I won’t move my mouth and I’ll stand up straight just to push you out.
So I can see your insides out,
And figure you out.
And I never thought […]
Soooo this is my first post thingy so no hate unless its at least funny and please comment your own thoughts.
I wanna start out by saying how weird life is and how unbelievably random it could be, but also how planed it ends up being. Like if I make a good choice to hang out with my first friend which goes into a bad decision of doing drugs, which leads to a path with fake friends. Then of course ended up here at block one with no friends just to start all over.
But I cant help to say that I kinda liked that part of my […]
I thought I had posted this last night but don’t see it. I don’t really understand all the SEO stuff but I checked them all. It seems like the most secure thing to do.
Anyway, all I can think of is ending my life here and planning it in terms of finding a few pets other homes, etc. I am older so it’s not like I have “my whole life ahead of me”. Depression/dysthymia with a few major episodes, nervous breakdowns, excruciating pain then surgeries then more excruciating pain, pain meds addiction. Finally managed to get out of pain and thru several Dr.s and bad doctoring […]
I was about to answer Sui_RC but I felt like making it a post instead because I felt that it could maybe help other people here.
Hi, from what I just read from your older post you are telling us that you feel useless. I understand that, you feel like the world would be the same without you. But I also saw that there is time where you laugh, I’m not going to tell you such a thing as ‘’live for the happy moment’’ that would be disrespectful of your wish but let me tell you something: if you can smile with others that mean you […]
…or at least that’s how I think I feel
I’m so worn down and tired all the time now. I’m not usually one to commit to displaying how bad I feel but recently I just had at It on social media (Instagram, snapchat, etc) Eventually people took notice and started worrying.
My boss called me in for a chat recently to see if I was alright. She looked at me funny when I couldn’t give her a reason as to why I feel so horribly bad. People who don’t actually suffer depression don’t seem to understand that it’s not necessarily a combination of negative things that make […]
I’m going through to much lost my girl lost my relationship with my mom in the process of being kick out only 17 no family no friends no income no job ask God everyday why me why me im I a good person or a bad person was I ment to be put on earth was I a mistake sometimes I question myself is there really a God if so Why do he let stuff like this happen to people why when I pray my praises doesn’t be answer Why Do I Find Myself Crying A bout my situation why don’t he come through for […]
Life for me it just a reset. Nothing is What it seems happiness is a temporary lie so why indulge.?? Because you want it so bad.. But once you get a taste its taken away from you and your left more broken than before. You just find ways to cope with life until it kills you or you end the suffering and do it yourself
I haven’t really gotten a chance to vent to others. Most of the time I’m too afraid to actually spill what’s on my mind to those closest to me, or my thoughts are too jumbled that I can’t really describe what I’m feeling very well so I have to brush it off and say ‘oh it’s nothing, don’t worry about it’ or ‘it’s a long story’. So when I saw this site I was pretty happy because not only can I actually say what I’m actually thinking without the fear of being stigmatized, but I can actually help myself cope by sharing everything that’s been […]
Im getting depressed of other people having great lives and succeeding. everyone seems so happy and its Friday night and im not doing much, well I cant. just needed to put this out, FB is bad for your mental health! I’ve been there. its a pattern that has to stop. otherwise I just sink in those black thoughts . why is it fair other peoples lifes are better? :/