I haven’t seen him in two months. And today, I decided “hey I need to see him” because I need a hug from him. But when I texted him asking if I can stop by to say hi, he didn’t answer. He didn’t answer. Not even a crappy made up excuse or a blunt no. Those would be better than not answering. Because then I would know what he thinks of me. But no. I don’t get a response. i would’ve taken anything but no response. Because it makes me feel like he cares about me so little that he can’t respond to a text. […]
Tag:
date
just enjoying the fasch of the first cigarette of the day. I don’t do it last night, finally the valium once. Got a date for netflix and chill tonight. Idk if i want it, it’s not the women i love.
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
Step one of five has been completed. My death date is January 9th. The same date as my birthday. My first step was to leave school. Well technically I got kicked out/academic probation but I didn’t tell anyone that. As far as everyone knows (including my family) I’m transferring to another school. I couldn’t tell anyone that I’m getting kicked out. I’m not blaming anybody for everything I did wrong and why i didn’t do well. I just don’t know what happened. I was doing so well with school and making straight A’s for the first 2 years. And I don’t even want to blame […]
I feel so numb. It’s almost like I’m dead inside. Ive always battled depression, I’ve always had suicidal thoughts off and on since I was very young. It’s different now… I know I’m going to do it soon. And I’m not afraid to do it. I’m not waiting for a specific date or time… I’m not writing goodbye letters, or even thinking about how to do it. I just feel it coming, and when it happens, how it happens, is just as simply not important. Nothing is anymore. I don’t even care how it got to be this bad, or why. I’m not curious, I’m […]
A few weeks ago, I was starting to get hope that I wouldn’t kill myself, that my future is still bright. Then suddenly, it all disappeared due to the pressure I get in trying to keep up in school. My suicide date is a few weeks away and I want to stop myself from killing myself, but the rest of myself is pretty convinced that I should end my life soon. I’m starting to avoid homework and other things altogether because one, I’m tired of school and that it drains the life out of me. I mean, who wouldn’t be tired when you wake up […]
So I’m on this site because I’m struggling. I’ve a date set and its all I can think of. Who knows, I had a date set at the start of this year and I was talked out of it.
Anyway, look, thats my sad story and I wont bore anyone with the details but what I do want to say is this. I’m on here the last few days and it seems the majority of posters are young. Some of you have horrendous back stories that make me cry for you, some of you I’m not sure of only I know that you are in a […]
Tomorrow, my boyfriend leaves for college. I don’t know if I can handle it. I figured out how to beat depression by myself just so I could date him. If it wasn’t for him, I would definitely be dead right now. But, I don’t know if I’m strong enough to handle him not being here. I don’t want to relapse, it’s been 9 months. I feel pathetic, feeling like I could fall apart over a boy. I feel pathetic, feeling like I could fall apart over a boy who’s only moving 45 minutes away.
Ugh. Where do I start? My life is a total cesspool (sorry if incorrect spelling) filled with empty promises, hopelessness, fear, regret, grief, and lies. Why do so many people hate me? What did I do? If the ignorant douchebags in my life don’t give a crap about me, well, they will when Im dead. If i could see the consequences of my death, i would love too. I would like to see how everybody reacts. They probably wouldn’t care. Everybody already only cares about themselves. I am scheduling a date to take myself out. Should I? Or should I forgive the god awful people […]
I’m sick of feeling sad all the fucking time. I’m sick and bloody tired. There are some days where I think ‘how could I have possibly felt that sad?’ but then it all comes rushing back.
I don’t have the right to be sad. My life is a breeze compared to other people’s lives. And it makes me feel like my problems are inferior, which in some ways they are.
I got my English Literature AS result today, and I got a B. And I’m not happy with it. I should be, considering I’ve taken it a year early, and that’s like an A at […]
I wish I were dead. I wish that, every single hour of every single day. I can’t actually do it myself. I can’t bring myself to be the one to do that to my parents. They wouldn’t understand, they would think it was their fault. In truth, I am privileged to have the parents that I do. It never feels like enough. I’m 28 years old, I’m single. And not just normal single, like, still a virgin, never even been kissed or asked out on one single, solitary date. Pathetic. Its driving me crazy. When I was younger my mom used to joke to her friends […]
I hate being black ever since i was a kid im now a 25yrd guy plus im short im 5″8 no body wants me. I tried talking to this girl but she said that she wouldnt date me becuase her mother didnt like black ppl and i could tell she didnt eather this is partly why i want to burn my color off.god cursed me with this ugly body now im going to get out of it by setting myself on fire
Been kinda upset recently. I have a friend who actually asked me on a date about 6 months ago, but never been in a relationship before I declined because I was scared and just don’t date people. I’ve kinda realized how good of a person he is and that I definitely do have a ‘crush’ on him, though I don’t know if I’m ready for a relationship considering how my last one ended. He’s literally a guy version of me but with better qualities personality-wise. But now he’s completely uninterested and moved onto better people, I guess. Like he definitely had a thing for my […]
I’m so selfish, that I even alienate people online as I do in the real world. Irony. I will admit I tried online dating, and I failed miserably. Haha what a joke I am. Can’t even get a date online. Oh the irony is killing me.
Ftw.
So, I just started a new job… I took it for several reasons:
a) I earn 300 euro more compared to before and could depending on my performance boost this with another 60% of my total salary… But this is just money. I hate it.
b) Maybe it is the same as the above as I am currently in dept more or less… because of the drugs. I actually took the job (partly) so that I could support this lifestyle, while thinking I would be able to make my life more stable with a 9 till 5 job rather then one in which my hours […]
Is worthless_loser alive? There was a scheduled post by him for 6 june named “by the time you read this” . I think that 6 june was his date for deadline for suicide. He has not shown any activity for some days also and his scheduled post has been deleted . Who deleted that scheduled post?
Nothing that out of the usual I guess, but today I swear to god was the worst I’ve had in a long fuckin’ while. If you are a parent and think it’s okay to tell your kid who they can and cannot date and how to live their life, then fuck you. Apparently my mother thinks it’s okay to boss me around and bash my decisions in life. WELL FUCK THAT. FUCK HER. FUCK EVERYTHING. If I really wanna smoke, then I’ll fuckin’ smoke. If I wanna date him or her, then I’ll fuckin’ date him or her. YOU WILL NOT TELL ME HOW TO […]
I said I’m sorry to my ex and now that I’m free I don’t feel bad for him or anything like that. and I can finally agree to date my friend since preschool.
I’m sorry that I’m writing this I feel like I have no right to be here. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I can’t get a job and I dream of getting a job that works with children but I have no experience in the work place. I look like a child even though I’m 21 have tons of scars on my face and can’t get a date. My college won’t let me into the school of education because I can’t interview well and because of me freaking out because over classes because I have nothing else to live for.
I doubt I will […]
I’d gone almost sixty days since my last suicidal thought. My court date last week changed all of that and suicide is again heavy on my mind. Now I am faced with the prospect of my future self being happier than my current self. Which do I believe. I don’t see happiness in the future.