I was just about to do it! Grab the rope from downstairs and hang it over that beam in my garage that hangs oh so high. I’m screaming “I dont want to do it, I dont want to do ! ” Â I never want to kill myself but I could never bear the fact that the world is crashing down right on top of me and I began to snap. I didnt know anybody was home but then I hear my father downstairs looking for his motorcycle keys. All I had to do was just wait till he got on that motorcycle and I would […]
Tag:
Face
Come on baby do you think it’s good to feel
Like I’m lying here swimming in memories
I fear God because everything dies babe
Got a gun in the back of my Car
A spasm of good sense is making my eye twitch
I’ve had enough on your consolation.
I’m drowning caught in a shit tide
Tape my face to the inside of love
Nothing to eat but fingers in the back seat
Well i’ve met God and he had nothing to say to me
I pray to god that you’re right before my eyes,
Bathed in white light with halos in your eyes.
Don’t wanna waste no […]
I wrote my suicide note. Then I crumpled it up and wrote it again.
by sono_libero
written by sono_libero
Three times I rewrote it. 
Then I cut. Deep. I watched my blood flow with complete serenity. 
That wouldn’t kill me, but the collection of pills by my bed surely would. This time I had more than enough. I wouldn’t fail this time. 
This is it. 
Then I remembered her face. That look of pure terror she wore as she died. As I watched her kill herself. Can I really do this?
Ok. If you self-harm, or think no one cares about you, you should probably read this.
by jjgirl13
written by jjgirl13
So I just woke up after a good 18 hours of sleep, so I’m going to post what’s on my mind while I have the energy. Throw rocks at me if you will.
So many people here don’t genuinely seem to be suicidal. Yes, I am aware that also many of you are. But a lot of people are just here to cry for attention or are depressed because a lack of attention from others. Crying for attention among other people who are here because they want attention, or because they are suicidal (and a lot of people who are suicidal are self-absorbed or caught […]
Dear Mum,
If you find this, damn your lucky. You probably don’t even know this site exists, and now I’m writing on it.
When I said I wasn’t bothered about not being with him anymore, I lied. I cried myself to sleep every night and continue to do so until this day even thou its so far on. I’m forced to see his face everyday, he’s befriended my enemy, and when I say I don’t like that girl, I mean she wrecked everything, she found out my darkest secrets, twisted them to make them ten times worse and exposed them to everyone. Now I see them everyday, […]
I know this is ridiculously long and most of you won’t care about what I have to say. That’s okay. I just needed to release some depression somewhere. I’ve been feeling worse and worse lately even though I know I’m trying to head in the right direction. I just needed to vent some frustration. I always say I’m doing this for me, changing for myself, but it still kills me when my family shows me how worthless I am… so here are my thoughts for the past week.
I’m amazed at how well I’ve become at wearing a mask. I’m able to conceal my emotions so […]
I am making a list of things that I could do to help me make it to Tuesday…
aside from stuffing my face with crap (which does not help in any way) what can I realistically do / accomplish / come up with / fabricate / engineer / occupy my time with / invent / rearrange / be proactive about / just to get on with it?
* take a shower
* eat a healthy breakfast
* work on details of a resume to help myself on Tuesday so the appointment I am putting such stock and hope in is able to help me go forwards…..
Hello folks,
I came here because I was really desperate and thinking to kill myself but something made me change my mind.
What?
I felt the injustice that others want to kill themselves, and the ONLY reason is despair, misfortune, violence and loneliness.
Not a deadly disease, not feeling dangerous for others.
No, just VICTIMS.
IS NOT FAIR! IS AN INJUSTICE
I would like, I want! to help everyone to stay alive AND have a better life. I have to do something for this.
IS ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY.
This give me the reason to live. I cannot find reasons to live just for myself, but I want to stop all this, and […]
I lost my sister 7 years ago the day after Thanksgiving. (I was 12 and she was 16)
Everyday since I feel like the rest of my life I will be lonely.
I’m going to kill myself soon, because I can’t stop missing her. And I know that when I do I will finally get to see her face again.
I am not feeling like it right now. That nagging feeling of pain, that would just fly around my head, I would try to swat it and it would stay there, flying.
I am content with that, and willing to live, but every once in a while I feel this crushing feeling, this little voice in the back in my head, that no matter what, I will fail, my dreams, my aspirations will just fall flat on it’s face, that my 17 years of life have been futile, worthless, an utter waste of time.
That the education system was rigged for me to fail. But right now? […]
Im out of my meds, and havent taken them for a couple of days, and im freaking the hell out. I need my fucking zolft . I feel like im trying to swollow a fucking knife right now, I want to cry , can you belive that? Im a guy im not supposed to cry, im supposed to just lock that shit away but with out drugs im fucked. I feel like ripping of my face or throwing everything on the floor and re-organize for hours(last time I arranged the house for 2 fucking days) Fuck OCD and Fuck depression and Fuck anxiety. I am […]
I have been feeling really low for years I am a 5’11 African american 22 year old fat girl I intimidate people so I can understand why some people turn their faces up when I enter the room or when I do something embarrassing why they judge me with their eyes sometimes I want to  take myself out of this world so as to not burden my family. My shameful trying face is my problem its fake to me That face of  mine that tries at life the me that is happy feel like all an act to work for an empty place that never exists and I’m starting to feel like even strangers can […]
I’ve landed back at my mom’s after yet another bipolar misfortune and It’s just torture to see how happy they are here. I am the weird vampire with  permanently shut curtains in an enclosed chamber that forcibly goes out only when strictly necessary. Still the door is not thick enough to prevent my family’s loud and constant laugher from reaching my ears. I get to hear their phone conversations and how they constantly make plans to meet others, go out to restaurants, country houses, trips and even to have sex. I want to strangle them. They once asked me, would you rather all of us […]
The only reason I am living is for others. My family, friends, and people I dont even know. I would have committed suicide by now, but ive told my friend not to tell anyone so if i end up doing it the burden will be on his shoulders. I dont know what to do. I havent told my parents or anything because i cant face them. I am a coward they would feel terrible, they would feel failure as parents if i told them. My life seems to have no meaning. Seems that nothing can make me happy. When something does make me happy it […]
I just want to run away, lose myself somewhere unfindable and do nothing but write things and sing things until it all starts to feel okay again. I’m tired of expectations, my own and everybody else’s. I just want to be alone with my words, completely alone. I don’t want to return until things start to make sense and I feel calmer and freer and completely comfortable with total independence. I need to learn to love my own company above everyone else’s because it’s not like anybody will ever stick around in my life for long. Sad, yes, but it’s a reality I must face. […]
So I just qot off the phone with my old bestfriend,I miss her!!!!!I wanna qive her the biqqest huq!!!So I told her about Teenqirl and this site.I told her to click my name and read my posts If she wants to know the real me.After readinq my embarrassinq Wrestlemania post,out of nowhere she starts cryinq and tells me “why would you do that?”Why would you cut your self?”She saw the cuttinq picture that I have.I couldn’t really say anythinq cause my friend was riqht next to me so I told her I’ll call her back.Her reaction made me feel horrible like fuck I should just […]
For the past two weeks almost every single night I have been standing at the very top of five flights of stairs, contemplating possibilities. Imagining my body falling. Would I face up or should I choose to face the ground? I am still afraid. That is why when I find myself there, hands gripping the railing, it takes me about an hour to move. And somehow through strength or fear, I am still here.
Last night, as I started my walk up these five flights of stairs my boyfriend called me. Instead of finishing the climb I hopped in my car and drove to his house. […]
Science say’s when you die. It’s game over. Consciousness is produced by the brain. Religion say’s we have a soul. I say youwhat.? If there is a god why would it give us soul’s. Make us immortal.? & why would he love us. Let’s face it. Human beings are a bunch of freaks. Self obsessed selfish & self absorbed. Ok there are expressions but not for most..
I think i’m a  searcher.
as the blackness blankets this side of the world
fear creeps into my mind
my nightlight dosent protect me
from the monster in my head
he only comes at night
when everyone is asleep
to feed his guilty pleasure
he creeps upon me
i feel him at the end of my bed
coming from underneath
i know not to scream
or ill find a pillow taking my last breath
i pretend to be asleep
 close my eyes as tight as i could
soon it would be over
and […]
I honestly have no idea how I am, who I am or what I’m doing. It’s difficult to have your whole family think you’re an attention seeker because you cut yourself and because you’re depressed and were suicidal. It hurts so much to let people you care about so much down. I hate myself more then anything ever. It’s so hard. When I say it’s so hard I hate myself more for being so weak and pathetic. I’m 16. I have grown up bullied, hit and at one point I was sexually assaulted which I very rarely talk about. I have a boyfriend now, his […]