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Fingers

I just want control..

by BrooklynBoxx
written by BrooklynBoxx

 

Is it bad.. that i still fight for control.. after getting stiches twice from cutting “to deep” the first time i hit my tenton, about a year ago.. i couldnt even move my left hand .. i didnt say anything for 3 weeks.. and the cut was still open.. i was in an intesive outpaitent center and finally they convinced me to tell my dad shall the doctor and they kinda i guess glued/burned it shut.. worse exspirence ever. Not stiches but you get the point..
The second time was about a month ago.. with the box of razors my x gave me i sliced at […]

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what they dont know…

by I.cant.breathe!
written by I.cant.breathe!

Hey says my friend kelsie as she slides into the booth with the rest of us. hey we reply. ok says amber time to start! (in case your wondering this is my group my friends my club. every saturday we get together at this ice cream place and talk about whatever. it normally ends up with us gossiping about people, and yesterday the topic changed to to something quite interesting…) okay so guess what i learned about maredith welsh said cassy (the leader,somehow dont ask me how probably a miracle, i am friends with what society calls “the populars” they know EVERYTHING about everything at […]

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My story leading to my major depression

by tatyana-young
written by tatyana-young

Hi, my name is Tatyana, people call me tatty. As I was growing up everything seemed normal, mom always thought I had ADHD and everyone else said I was normal. But I wasn’t. My mom met the man ad her dreams, so she thought. He was nice, to her. Me.. Well he’d beat the hell out of me. He’s make me bleed, he smashed me so hard he got my blood on the wall and on my bed, I was only 5 years old. I’ve been in 8 foster homes. They were all horrible. Tryed killing myself when I was 7 I over dosed on […]

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I met God… He had nothing to say to me!

by Boots6
written by Boots6

Come on baby do you think it’s good to feel
Like I’m lying here swimming in memories
I fear God because everything dies babe
Got a gun in the back of my Car
A spasm of good sense is making my eye twitch
I’ve had enough on your consolation.

I’m drowning caught in a shit tide
Tape my face to the inside of love
Nothing to eat but fingers in the back seat
Well i’ve met God and he had nothing to say to me

I pray to god that you’re right before my eyes,
Bathed in white light with halos in your eyes.

Don’t wanna waste no […]

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The Day

by JustTooLate
written by JustTooLate

Walking through the halls
Glancing only at profiles
Never look em in the eyes
So why do I even own a mobile?

If anyone ever got to know me
They’d know im not such a bad guy
Im just like everyone else homie
Except, oh yeah, I wanna die

Is that was this is all about?
You people feeling weird?
You getting a tingling in your tummy
And an ichin in your beard?

Well don’t worry that’s normal.
Just not for someone who was built.
Like you.
My friend, that not-so-friendly feeling is guilt.
It’s true.

Now I can name names
And I can point fingers all day
But that […]

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Ok. If you self-harm, or think no one cares about you, you should probably read this.

by jjgirl13
written by jjgirl13

So I just woke up after a good 18 hours of sleep, so I’m going to post what’s on my mind while I have the energy. Throw rocks at me if you will.

So many people here don’t genuinely seem to be suicidal. Yes, I am aware that also many of you are. But a lot of people are just here to cry for attention or are depressed because a lack of attention from others. Crying for attention among other people who are here because they want attention, or because they are suicidal (and a lot of people who are suicidal are self-absorbed or caught […]

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Oh, The Thinks You Can Think

by Jimmy62
written by Jimmy62

 

When I think About You

 

When I think about you

I wonder if you feel whispers biting at your ear

Attempting to notify your heart

Do you hear

That you are the pinnacle of a little boy’s thoughts?

I fear

Every time my memory drops an ice cube down my back

Kissing each vertebrae cold

That you are thinking about me in a shade too close to black

Because in my thoughts exhausted by you

I only concoct colors of yellow and blue

I wonder if your mind paints pictures of me

The same ones I draw of our fingers wrapping warmly

Do you […]

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Piece by piece by piece.

by Just another sad, sad girl.
written by Just another sad, sad girl.

“It’s dying, It’s dying!” They all cry,
Your heart got far too close to mine,
And now it’s ripping, breaking inside,
My body breathes a sigh of relief as it’s time.

I can hear it in the wind, I can feel it on my skin,
“Just one more time, you’ll feel much better ” I can’t let these voices in.
“Please don’t desert us, we were always there for you,
On those lonely nights when you were lost and didn’t know who to turn to.
Self harm? No harm! What harm can it do? They take me away cause they know it hurts you.”
Now she’s […]

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That Hope No One Knows about Part 1

by SomeMalaise
written by SomeMalaise

I want to start by saying that I’m quite damaged. Just like many I’ve been through some things. Lots of things. Complicated and simple. I have hope. But don’t take that so fully. Don’t eat it, sip it. Lasts longer. It’s early in the morning so I’ll do these in parts as I’m sleepy again. I hope you are able to find a ray of hope in each part.

I’m obviously still alive. Why? I do not know, but a spark is still with me. Whether I admit to it or not. It’s there. In middle school I had this spark when my grades were failing, […]

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I don’t know what to do….

by waitingforyouu
written by waitingforyouu

I’m currently at work, my back is killing me, Still, I manage to keep a normal expression on my face, but I’m in pain, my back has been hurting me for the past 3 days and it’s just getting worse, I’ve put icy hot to calm my muscles but still, the pain is there. Last week my hair began to fall out so much, not just what you would expect, like if I run my fingers through, I’d pull out about 20 each time or more, it’s scary, I’m so afraid of brushing it now. Is it because I’m stressed out? Last night my ex […]

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Vanilla twilight- owl city

by rawrimaturtle..
written by rawrimaturtle..

The stars lean down to kiss you, 
And I lie awake and miss you.
Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere.
‘Cause I’ll doze off safe and soundly, 
But I’ll miss your arms around me.
I’d send a postcard to you dear, 
‘Cause I wish you were here.

I’ll watch the night turn light blue.
But it’s not the same without you, 
Because it takes two to whisper quietly, 
The silence isn’t so bad, 
Till I look at my hands and feel sad, 
‘Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly.
I’ll find repose in new ways, 
Though I haven’t slept in […]

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The wondrous possibilities!

by These bruises
written by These bruises

Is it possible?

To be able to feel better simply by writing down feelings and thoughts?
Is that what I needed to do all this time?

After writing my first post I felt like shit, bringing all those memories back up again after spending so long trying to forget.  But now. Now- I feel better.  Lighter maybe, more resilient. Perhaps, dare I say it..  A little closer to how I used to feel.

Lets hope this thing sticks with me when I feel I need to bring up darker memories.

Fingers crossed.

And.. damnit.  Reading over what I’ve just written is making me question wether what I felt way back when […]

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My… Our first date…

by RogueShadow1281
written by RogueShadow1281

I went on my first date with Jasmine. Although it took nearly forever to get to see her (about 2 hours), I got to see her and whatever deity or unknown force decided to fuck off today. 

Alex, her brother was there too. He understands the situation now and so does my brother, I love Jasmine and there’s nothing that will change it. 

Even though I feel sexual thoughts for her, let me tell you that since she’s a girl, and I’m a guy, then that means… I will get sexual feelings for her? Yeah thats right. 

But I was so nervous it took me till we were […]

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what a great day

by justwannahelp112
written by justwannahelp112

so another great day at skool… i shut myself down during my first class and couldn’t function mentally.i found out that next week sometime i will have to disect a frog… the only problem is that im afraid of the fact i will be holding a sharp object and i will have to fight my impulses. so after that somebody handed me a stapler… you have no idea how much i wanted to staple my fingers… just to feel the pain, to know i was still alive still human. thats one reason y i cut myself… to know im still alive and human. so my […]

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Another Round

by queen827
written by queen827

Its weird how I check into this thing alot now throughout the day. I’m curious to see if other people are out there who feel even a fraction of what I feel.

Today was a very bad day. Its funny when you close your eyes at night thinking  tomorrow will be better, today was the worst it could get. But that wasn’t the case. To end of the horrible day, another Utopian moment happened. Followed by alot of sweet bbm’s and constant pings when a response wasnt received right away. However those are just more moments. False promises made in a moment never mean anything real. Chances are it was forgotten […]

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Worthless

by schroeder
written by schroeder

I have spent the last two weeks in bed. I have no desire to get out of it. I feel like i am dead but still alive. I am worthless and dont deserve anything. I was the last born in a family of five. My parents had me late in life. My brother who was twelve when i was born was murdered. My brother had a friend that was dealing drugs and setting fires. He was going to testify against is fromer friend. His family had my brother killed. He was struck a car late one night and died of massive head and chest. It […]

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My Dream

by AlmostAWhisper
written by AlmostAWhisper

In my dreams, I always dreamt I cut myself so deep that I’d lay there dying in an ocean of my own blood. For so many nights, I dreamed I bled more than normal, I dreamt I lay there as the life blood flows from my body. It always has the same end. Everyone I loved runs in my room in blinding fury. They look at me with deadly smiles and wicked eyes. Charging towards my barely conscience body, they reach into my skin and rip out my veins. And I scream…I scream so loud over their animalistic laughter. I’m drowning in my own blood, but […]

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What I think.

by helper
written by helper

I really don’t know what to do anymore… its not that I’m really giving up, I just don’t know what to do now. I have been thinking about life, and what to do. I want to live happily, and I think about the future, and I know how I’ll feel and yes I feel like that sometimes but other times I just go down and it all seems to slip through my fingers. I just don’t know what to do right now. So I’ll just keep sitting around hoping no praying I can get better, you see I know why and the reason for […]

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