When will this all get better ? For years I’ve been waiting to just have one person I could love & grow with that would love me back . I loved & I gave 100% & I still got played . I changed my life, my ways, my views & in the end it was all in vein . I’ve never felt betrayal like this before … I’ve never felt pain like this before . I’m always so strong & now I don’t know where that girl is anymore . I allowed people to steal my joy & everything else that made me, me . What […]
Tag:
hurt
The world has been comming down on me for a long time now and i cannot keep up with it anymore, i hurt physically and emotionally and nothing helps, 15+ years of feeling terrable And i cannot keep going. Dose anyone have a reason to keep going? Probably not. So if anyone would like to help me do myself in that would a big help. I have tried but i guess not hard enough.
I don’t want to hurt my family, but I am in too much pain to carry on. I was never meant for this world. I feel so alone and lost. I just want my soul to be forever free.
I will miss being held by those who love me.
I will miss watching cow parsley swaying in the breeze.
I will miss songs that remind me of those who left me.
I will miss the smell of warm rain, small rabbits, dandelions and daisies.
I will miss helping those who need me.
I will rest in peace, knowing I brought more joy than pain to the world.
Although I regret the harsh words I sometimes spoke, especially to those who hurt me.
I hope my death does not take long, I don’t want to suffer or have people watch me suffer.
I wanted death a couple of months ago. Then I found a […]
I wish I could hide out. Hibernate like a bear. Or fall down a hole and no one finds me. Like I wanna run away to Mexico where nobody knows me or my past. Then I could be whoever I wanted. Or if I could disappear. Or be a fly on the wall. [because they have short life spans] I just don’t wanna be me anymore. I don’t wanna be here anymore. I don’t wanna hurt anymore.
I love my children enough to leave them before I cause any more damage. I know they will miss me but if I am around I could do so much more damage than if I were dead. At least when I’m dead that will be the last thing I do to hurt them.
I have got to go because I am done. There’s no more art, no more me, no more drama, and everyone can breath now. I can’t hurt you all anymore after this. You will move on and find better people to spend time with.
I’m selfish and narcissistic. I’ve no drive to live […]
I am tired to explain my problems, but I suffer every second of my life and it’s not gonna end. I know in my heart I won’t be happy again, I personally ruined my family, friendships, love and job. All my fault, odd story but I self-destroyed myself and I can’t blame anyone but me. I’ll never forgive myself and I’ll never get back the things I lost and I can’t live without them. I have to go to end this.
On the other hand I already hurt beyond imagination the people I love, and I can’t afford to add other pain. My death would literally […]
Lost everything, lost my heart, lost every interest. I wish I never exist.
If you ever loved me, my life would worth it. But you never did, yet I love you like everything, I love you with all my life.
If I was not 14 years old when I fell in love with you, it would less hurt.
I kissed my dream girl for the first time ever yesterday best moment of my life I showed her I loved her even if she lies and destroys me this heart is hers now her ex showed up and I’m just like all the other guys just a matter of time where I will end I’ll be thrown out I’m sorry to all those I loved but hurt in the end I want you to know it wasn’t any of your faults
This isn’t something I typically talk about because it isn’t an easy subject to approach. I’m going back to my doctor soon to figure out how far things have progressed or if they’ve changed at all. I really don’t think I want to know. I’m so tired of this.
I would kill to feel like I could trust someone. Anyone. But people come into my life and I throw them away just as quickly. Id rather hurt them than let them hurt me. Might as well beat them to the punch. Right?
In all honesty, I’m scared. Of everything. I don’t know where to turn. don’t […]
Well it appears this is the only place I have to talk about this. I have no one that understands what its like. I cant tell anyone from the proffesional field because they will just lock me up till I tell them Im all better. Has happened before. I cant take it anymore. Ive lost everything I possessed and everyone i loved. The one person left in my life that I truly truly love doesnt know it and never will. No matter anyway. i was content with having her as my friend but now she is not even that. I dont even register on radar […]
My obnoxious buck-toothed dumbfuck brothers outed me to my conservative mom. I’m a transguy. I’m still figuring out myself, and I certainly wasn’t ready to tell anyone else. Plus my mom’s in a difficult situation herself – she’s depressed, anorexic, going through a divorce, etc. So it’s really ridiculous to burden her with my situation.
She told me I was an attention-seeker who needed to pray. I told her – and tried to be firm – that I felt confident and happy, dressed as a guy. She responded that it was a false sense of confidence instilled by the devil. According to her, no one in […]
In this shaken twisted world I gradually become transparent unable to be seen. I merely don’t want to hurt you inside of a world that came out of somebody’s imagination so In the end I know I’ll corrupted as I waited for paradise. I know I won’t be the same anymore so remember the way I use to be as who I should be […]
I’ve been thinking a lot lately and maybe life isn’t for everyone. I mean life is too hard for me. I put myself in my parents shoes a thousand times and I just don’t understand why they treat me the way that they do. Even more questioning is why I care about how they feel…but I admit I do care how they feel. I know what it’s like to hurt and I wouldn’t wish that even on those who caused me that pain. And i know that it won’t hurt them.They have other kids and already have grandkids from my half sisters. There is actually […]
My life’s not really going anywhere. I’ve got a lot of debt, no good job prospects, and I’ve given up trying. Some of my friends keep trying to help. Words of encouragement that by themselves don’t do jack fuck to change reality, A couple links to some stupid career builder websites and suggestions to keep checking Indeed, as if I haven’t done similar things or thought of that already. Yes, it could work eventually, maybe, but there’s more than that. I want a lover… Just, I’m tired of wondering how much longer I have to deal with this bullshit. So, I’m going to try to […]
When you fall back into your old thoughts and ways. When you wish life could be better or that some how you can just go to sleep and not wake up. I’ve been feeling like complete and total crap the past few months. I’ll be honest my health has been on a steady decline and it sucks. It sucks having ovarian cysts that keep reoccurring more painful each time, have HPV and being at risk for cervical cancer some day especially now since I would have repeated and frequent abnormal cervical cells. Not just that But my joints constantly pop and I have the shingles […]
I’m not secure anymore. My walls were supposed to keep me safe and yet I find I crash and burn. He wasn’t supposed to hurt me. Fathers shouldn’t do that. The abuse, the bullies, the torture…. It’s all too much. I’m not sure how much more I can take
Hi everyone im not sure why im on here telling everyone my story but here it goes not that anyone cares i have been thinking about suicide for along time i got hurt several years ago and lost the use of my left arm and i have cronic pain in my arm now i have to take alot of pain meds just to get through the day im on disability and i hate not being able to work my wife left me several months ago because she said im not the same person anymore and i found out she had been cheating on me for […]
Theres only one person i really care about is my best friend. ive known her for 8 years and i’ve told her about my problems. She made me promise not to cut or hurt myself again, hope i can keep that promise.