Once there was a little pinhead who became infatuated with another little pinhead. The two pinheads pinned around together and produced five mini, pathetic pinheads. The pinheads lived from lousy paycheck to paycheck, their kids miserable, lady pinhead an anorexic crying mess half the time…
Finally daddy pinhead meets a sexy blonde library pinhead and they start pinning around secretly. Lady pinhead doesn’t like this. Not one bit. She quits her job, quits taking care of the little pinheads…
3/5 little pinheads end up in institutions for various reasons. Eventually lady pinhead takes her turn in the hospital, where they force her to eat little […]
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God is boring . boring God . why human’s imagination & fantasy is better than God boring reality ? why God is boring ?
by niki
written by niki
God is boring . boring God .
why human’s imagination & fantasy is better than God boring reality ?
why God is boring ?
I hate this world . I hate this life . I hate life .
This world is so boring , boring world !
This life is so boring , boring life ! life is boring .
Why movies , games , anime / manga, & fantasy / imagination is better than this world / better than life / real life / real world / reality ?
everyday life is the same : wake up, eat, go to school/work, boring, then go back home, […]
That’s all I have ever wanted to be; a faithful wife. Sadly, having had you in my life, this will never happen. The only desire in my heart for my entire life has been to simply devote myself completely to someone else and now I know that this will never happen. The depression and anxiety have been eating me alive for years but I hung on with the hope that I would eventually fulfill my dream. Now that this can’t happen, I struggle to even get out of bed in the morning. Oh, I have also since developed bulimia and attempted suicide (though the last […]
I crawl into myself.
No-one notices, half surprised
Each wrapped up in oneself
After-all, aren’t we all disguised?
Ever hiding
Ever redirecting
Everything sliding
Barely suspecting
Embodied detachment
Am I a person anymore?
Tears fall in the catchment
—
But what can you do
You have no one
No one able to handle your words
Let alone your feelings
So you crawl inside
Unsure why death seems so appealing
Yet the only thing you are sure of, is how much you want to die
You don’t want to run, to leave everything behind.
I wonder what my mom would like for mother’s day. Flowers? Perfume? A hug? Maybe from her daughters! That’s right she doesn’t count me as a daughter. She’d probably like it better if she could sign a certificate to disown me. I can sort of give her that.
My mother has two daughters (half siblings who are in their mid-twenties) whom she has always loved and adored. They got anything that they asked for and more. Me? The COMPLETE opposite. I barely got attention infact the only attention I ever got was negative. Neither of my parents have ever told me that they loved me. But […]
I know it shouldn’t matter, but seeing people around me happy, fulfilled, able to handle their finances, their relationships, their lives, it just makes me feel even worse.
I had been feeling better earlier in the year, but seeing other’s succeeding while I continue to fail has sent my back down. I had to delete my Facebook, because it only depressed me.
I have lost everyone that ever mattered to me (save for a few family members and a friend in another state). It is abundantly that others who I thought I was important to don’t care about me or need me at all.
I have long ago […]
I haven’t been on in a while nor have I written anything in quite sometime. I don’t know exactly why, but I just haven’t. My life has taken a turn and it seems to be a positive one for a chance. I fell in love despite my best efforts. It was quick. I knew as soon as I saw him and talked to him it was over. POW! Head-over-heels in love. He means everything to me, essentially he is my life. We moved in together and it seems to be working out. Honestly the biggest change in my life is that I am about 4 […]
After years of searching without and within – I’ve decided that the best decision I can make for myself is to die now instead of later.
I’m scared to die because I’ve never died before; however, I refuse to stay and am terrified more of staying here – miserable for no reason at all. I’ve spent 3 years coming to this conclusion, asking questions, researching, you name it. I’ve had 30 years of sheer misery.. it’s time to go and this isn’t an act of desperation. At least I don’t believe it is. I’ll know on the other side. Since we all fail (daily for me), […]
Some background info for those not familiar with my posts. The daughter in the title is not my biological child, and I have no claim to her in a legal sense, either. She is my ex-fiancée’s daughter. We were together for 5 1/2 years, and she left me for no reason earlier this year.
She then proceeded to completely erase me from her life. And so have her kids. She has gone back to her ex-husband, who she left in order to be with me. I haven’t seen her or the kids since February 1st.
To this day I don’t know what I did to […]
The last two month’s have been the worse month’s of my life. I have destroyed my master’s degree, relationship with parents and have no friends around me, all for stupid, pathetic, childish reasons and obsessions. Will my end be suicide ?: I doubt it. However, I will be running away, at least. I was obviously born with a defect. I seldom know what else to say– I have merely destroy my self; another dust in the wind, taken away, thrown into the depths of nothingness.
Goodbye everyone.
I’m scared. What is in the other side? I don’t believe in God or religion. I’m about to leave… I love you my flame… Help me.
Sitting here right now, tears running down my face. The feeling in my entier body can only be described as agony. It is always there because i am always alone. No matter who is around, my family, co workers, or the one person in the whole world that i feel I could talk to(but shouldnt, cant put this on her its not fAre to her) can be surrounded by them, and i am completly alone.
Can hear you say it now, call this hotline… what I need is to feel apreciated, accepted, how could someone who dose not know me do that..
Or, see a shrink. Mite […]
I didn’t see any age restrictions so, I turn sixteen in a month. I promised myself when I turned fifteen that I wouldn’t live to be sixteen, that I had to kill myself before that. But I am a coward, so I just pray every single day to God to just let me die. Car accident, burglary-gone-wrong, give me cancer for fucks sake. But nothing. I’m still here for some reason, maybe. I don’t even know why I’m posting here, I just got bored and decided to ask Google why I was still alive. It didn’t give me an answer, but I found this site. […]
Two years ago I was almost strangled to death by my boyfriend. I have never been the same since that night. I hate myself I hate myself so much I just want to die and I hate looking at myself in the mirror. I’m not me
I guess I’ll just start from the beginning here… I found this site while looking up suicide information, and I guess you could call this my last resort.
I’m 18 years old, raised under an abusive mother and a father that loved me but never stood up for me and my needs. The last age I can remember not being depressed was probably around 12 years old. I’ve been told by my family and friends that I need to simply choose to be happy, but that simply isn’t working for me. I know I’m sick. I hear voices and have episodes where I forget who I […]
Someone right now is leaving their apartment
Looking down at the street, wondering where there car went
Someone in the car sitting at a signal
In front of a restaraunt, staring through the window
at someone right now with their finger in their teeth
Who could use a little floss right across the street
there’s somebody on the curb who really needs a jacket
spent half the rent at a bar getting plastered
Now he gotta walk fourteen blocks
to work at a shop where he’s about to get fired.
Someone right now is looking pretty tired
Staring at a laptop trying to get inspired
Somebody living right across the street
She wrote the best things she’s written […]
What do you do when you’ve been diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder? How would you feel when a group of professionals call your behaviour attention-seeking?
Well let me tell you. First of all you begin to dissect every single aspect of your life. That comment you just made to your friend – was that just an attempt to steer the conversation towards you? The anger you felt when your friend turned up fifteen minutes late. Was that because of a deep insecurity about your own importance in the world? Do you believe that time itself should stop for you? Those conversations you have had with mental […]
Sometimes I wish that I didn’t exist. Nothing in my life seems to ever be going right anymore. I wish my life was over all the time. I don’t think about suicide as much anymore, and I haven’t tried in 7 months to kill or otherwisebharm myself, but I still wish I were dead.
Everything was fine until a couple years ago, and now I seem to be in a downward spiral I can’t get out of. I’m an 18 year old girl and most of my life has been pretty tough.
A couple years ago, I got my first job. It wasn’t the best job, but […]
“Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.”
Hey. I’m currently stuck in my mid teens somewhere in the green hills of sunny old England. And I want to die.
For years now, I have been diagnosed with depression. I feel it probably has been constant in my life, after suffering abuse at the hands of my brother, then having to care for my mother while my father worked long shifts (he is always quite submissive, meaning he had to work far into the nights, often until 11pm). First of all, I tried to go on alone, with fairly minimal support. Then I made two attempts on […]
Today in therapy I learned a few things about myself. As a child, I was never taught kindness, or how to love. I raised myself and my little brother. My mom was always sleeping, or couldn’t care less. The little she did for us, some cooking and laundry, she’d complain about, scream about it. She is a ticking time bomb we’d have to tiptoe around, avoiding the next explosion. As unpredictable as she is, it somehow was always my fault, she was never in the wrong. What could a 4 year old have done to have my mom scream at me every day before school? […]