damn, this ghastly insomnia has caught up to me again. It seems i am trapped in my own mind.
its never a pleasant experience when i am caught up in my own thoughts. idea’s and realizations take hold and i cannot shake them, ergo what led me to self harm in the first place.
but on a rare occasion a wondrous idea takes root, and it is great at first, but then i become fixated on it, it is in my every thought and dream. it makes me feel new and whole and like there is a point to the future after all.
but then […]
Tag:
Insomnia
Well, I guess, My story starts about 1 year ago… I had been struggling with Insomnia and would do anything to get a full nights rest. I was mean, angry and on the verge of tears constantly. My friend had the same issue, but not as bad, her mom had bought some all natural sleeping aids. They worked great for my friend and I was envious! I had asked my mom as soon as I heard about the success, if she could maybe be open to me trying them out.. I was shut down so fast… I was angry and hurt that she had said […]
damn, this ghastly insomnia has caught up to me again. It seems i am trapped in my own mind.
its never a pleasant experience when i am caught up in my own thoughts. idea’s and realizations take hold and i cannot shake them, ergo what led me to self harm in the first place.
but on a rare occasion a wondrous idea takes root, and it is great at first, but then i become fixated on it, it is in my every thought and dream. it makes me feel new and whole and like there is a point to the future after all.
but then i bore of […]
hi,
I’m new to this site. I was going through a hard time and subconsciously started to look at suicide related links, which lead me here.
I’ve had depression, bulimia and other illnesses like insomnia for about eleven years now. Although I tried and failed to commit suicide about five years ago, I’m generally a cheerful person and eight years with a good counsellor has lead me a long way.
I still have problems holding a job down, but the biggest blow is that the one love I’d been with for five years told me recently that he is marrying someone else. I have no choice but to respect […]
Not being able to sleep is one of the worst feelings. Â Insomnia is definitely something to hate. Â I don’t go to bed until 4 or 5am. Â I then wake up around 12pm and just go do my normal day to day jobs. Â My boyfriend gets home at the mid afternoon. Â I hardly ever see him. Â Once he gets home, he comes up to our room to see me, spends 5 minutes with me, then goes to hangs out with his friends for ages, then doesn’t come back up until 7pm, then we make dinner, then we watch a movie (where no catch up or talking […]
Is it normal to take this long to get to sleep? for the last few days so many things have been on my mind. lately its been taking me at least 3 hours to get to sleep. i feel so tired, but i just cant manage to sleep well. i feel like i am on the verge of insomnia. Â ive tried listening to music. ive tried reading a book, and even just forcing my eyes shut and lying in bed for hours.
i need to clear my head.
but i dont know how.
I have insomnia. Â I have been diagnosed with servers depression and I really don’t know where to turn to anymore. Â I am up all night and exhausted during the day. Â I feel absolutely useless to my boyfriend who said to me that it will be ok and it isn’t because he is the one who has found me multiple times blacked out on the floor with a razor in hand. Â I’m unemployed and unable to find work. Â I am contemplating suicide and I just need someone to listen.
All day long its the same thing. The same boring classes, the same horrible people, the same note plastered on my locker. “DORK”. The same 2-3 hours sitting all alone at home, the same rest of the day being yelled at and being told to shut up when I try to start a pleasant conversation. The same insomnia, trying desperately to fall asleep but my brain wont shut the fuck up, the same exhaustion I feel when I finally shut off my alarm the next morning. Im so tired of this, Im exhausted and bored. I think Im finally done.
Well, I am here now, after I couldn’t figure out where to go finally I found this site, and I hope this is gonna help me.Â
I had severe depression for two and a half-three years. My story started when I turned four or five, my brother started to act weird. First he was hurting me all the time, he was nine at the time, but it was okay, this is no big deal between siblings. I was always the type of kid who is playing alone and trying to stay out of trouble. My brother started to fight with my parents, first it wasn’t […]
I am young, (13 almost 14) and I know I should be weird with my emotions. I have suicidal thoughts all of the time. I cry for no reason, suffer from insomnia, and have constant headaches with no medical reasoning. I’ve taken tests online, searched up the symptoms of depression, and all that stuff, and I am sure that I have it. I was okay until I broke my ankle (like a month ago, still have the cast today) where I got a lot worse. Now I just want to die, no matter what. I’ve been so close to trying to drown myself, and while […]
I’m not really wanted here at my home, my town, or my school. People even say it to me. Everyone seems to be strait up with me. Like “No one even likes you here, just leave already.” “If you take all of your medication and die no one would even care.” I mean like, I ignore them. But I can see why they don’t like me, I don’t even like me. Haha. I’m ugly, I’m too quiet, I never talk, I’m weird, I stare too much, I try to be smart in school (but get judged for it), my whole life revolves around my dead […]
My name’s Brittany.
And my life’s just a mess.
I deal with depression and anxiety, and I’m here at 2:20 in the morning because I also suffer from insomnia which all three extremely suck.
I’m a drop out. School’s too much to handle for me. It stresses me out.
I stay home and do nothing. I don’t have a job or anything. My mother hates it and if I don’t do anything she’s kicking me out in 14 days.
Honestly, I don’t have much friends. So I have no where to go.
I do have a boyfriend, but he’s gone until June.
I’m just feeling alone, […]
Okay, so I was on Yahoo! answers or whatever thats called, and this girl’s question was “How can I become an Insomniac?”
What. The. Hell. Is. the. matter. with. you?
She said she wanted to be an insomniac because she doesnt like sleep and she never sleeps.
Okay, you moron, Ima tell you what I know about sleep and insomnia: (some are personal experiences)
1.Sleep deprivation cam KILL you.
2. Insomnia is HORRIBLE.
3. you are a moron
4. People with insomnia are tired as hell, but can’t fall asleep
5. without sleep, you can begin to halucinate and have suicidal thoughts.
6. a lot of other boring facts that no one cares about.
BOTTOM […]
Its another morning.
I awake. I sob. I’m awake. I’m still alive. I wish I wasn’t.
I suffer from dysthymia, a form of mild depression that is persistent. All I know is down, all I have ever known is down. I also suffer from Major Depression, episodes of extremely severe depression that last 1-12 months at a time. Yes, they put depression in my depression so I can be depressed while I’m depressed. This is called double depression. One of its features is being more hopeless than someone with one form or the other, another is that it is hard to treat.
I also have generalized anxiety. Tons of anxiety all […]
I used to have thoughts of hiding under a car tire, and waiting for a family member to back up. I just couldn’t go through with it. Through the past 11 years of my life I’ve been completely miserable. There has been a series of unfortunate events that lead me to where I am today: living in a shitty apartment alone, no friends, hardly talk to family, education going down the toilet, and terrible insomnia. I’ve been doing some research on suicide methods, and I want to go via ********. But, it seems like there are many failed attempts. Anyone have any advice?
I sat in the cafeteria at school this morning waiting for school to start, i was at a table all to myself and i kept looking at my phone, no one was texting me but i wanted to look like i had some friends you know..
After about 20 minutes a boy looks over at me his table is overflowing with his friends and asks “are you lonely? i think your lonely”
I laughed and said “no they’ll be here soon, their bus is just running a bit late”
I turned around and whispered ” they’ll never be here.. cause i dont have any..”
After me and Tanner broke […]
Right now it’s nearly four in the morning and this is my 7th night sleeping late this week because of my insomnia . I’ve been really frustrated and angry these past few days and I usually don’t feel this way I’ve realized that it’s because I’ve been thinking a lot lately, with the new year approaching I feel very upset because a year has passed and my depression has gotten worse , last year I took time off from activities because I felt like there was something wrong and that the activities were no longer enjoyable so I wanted to take a break to focus […]
The shooting today.. 20 kids dead… 6 adults it brought up so many memories, that may have even no relation.
First the shock that someone can hurt kids so innocent.. then i remember my past 2 people hurt me.. when i was so young.. to innocent to protect myself. At their entire control, my life was basically in there hands…
Then i thought of how these kids would suffer 5-10 years from now. Like i do today, the symptoms of my PTSD have cause severe depression, anxiety, insomnia, psudo siezures, multiple persanality disorder, and bipolar. I agree some of these may not have been a direct result, […]
I sit here eating .. like a pig. Ive already eaten two burriotos, chow mein and now icecream.. and yet im still hungery. I’ve tried to puke up my food but i never have the balls. And i’ve tried to go with out eating but all it does when i finally eat is make me look like a bigger big then i already am. Im 14 and wieght 125pounds and i hate it. Everyone says its fine. That thats a normal weight.. but when u look at the other girls AT SCHOOl at their all 105 and TALLER then you .. you know your fat. […]
I feel desolate. My mind has lost all of the positive light it had gained within the past 2 weeks. Well, I’m here again, at the same place I was a few years ago. I’m supposedly back on the right path, doing everything right or so they say. I’m constantly busy, tired, and thoroughly occupied each day. Between work, school, and training for my next racing season, you’d think there wouldn’t be any time for my depression to suffocate me, right? Wrong. I’ve been suffering so badly lately and I’m sure it’s only going to get worse as the holidays are circling around me. I […]