Things were starting to get better. It’s been almost two weeks since the last time I sliced myself. I finally told my dad to get me a therapist since my mom doesn’t give a shit. I guess my dad forgot about me again. Not a surprise, my family seems to forget about me alot. I even tell them I’m their forgotten child.
I really hate my family. Especially my mom. She thinks it’s hilarious to make fun of me. She’s over done it today. Haha very funny to make fun of your daughter in front of my dad and little brother. I always just […]
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Little Brother
Ok my teacher went on a rant on how suicide is for selfish cowards. And I don’t understand how she can say this, yes its a bit selfish but I think its more selfish to make someone live when they have so much happens to them and they have been strong for so long don’t they understand there is only so far you can bend before you snap? Also how can they say its for cowards they have never had to pick up the blade, tie the knot, gag on the pills. They don’t know how much courage it takes to end your life to have the […]
I want a way out, simply put, no sugar coating it.
I have an average life, I know there are people worse off, call me selfish, I just want to end it all.
I am 17, 18 in October.
I hate the thoughts if waking up in the morning on weekends. I put on the fake show, pretending to be the happy popular girl in school. (Yeah call me big headed I’ve been called worse 🙂 )
I have above average grades, Honestly never opened a book in my life, pulled three A’s in Higher maths English and ordinary Irish, did transition year, passed it […]
My last day online will be 05/31/2012. My last actual day … not soon enough. And if anyone tries to pull that stuff that someone did with Biscuit on here, it is not going to work with me so do not waste your time.
A few more weeks and I’ll be out of here. One of my methods is already procured and the two backups are on their way. Terminated my employment a week ago so it is daily inundation in books, games, movies and music until the end. Since the job is done and the methods are going to be present, no turning back now.
Everything […]
Well…..I never thought I would ever think of suicide. As a child I always feared my little brother would suicide because he had anxiety problems and was bullied. He barfed every single day before school when he was in grade 1, but his therapist helped him and now he’s a popular 16 year old with an on again off again suicidal girlfriend (is that irony? I don’t know). But back to me because I am so selfish, I have loving parents and family as well as supportive loving friends. I have no right to depressed like this when there are so many other people in […]
It’s 3:00 AM, I’m laying in bed. Thoughts running around my mind, can’t sleep. Nothing new there. One thing keeps replaying though, a dream of my parents trying to explain to my little brother and sister why their big brother decided to take his life.
Why can’t I get rid of these thoughts? Why does my life seem so unbearable? There are so many more who are worse off than I am.
Why am I so miserable?
This is my first post on this website, but I know I’ll end up coming back here.
I never thought that I would end up on a site like this, struggling with my identity and hurting myself physically and mentally. I feel dirty and shameful and hypocritical. I always tell my friends and anyone who will listen to never never EVER hurt yourself, that it’s a horrible thing to do and that people love them, but when I do it, it becomes something else. I don’t want anyone to know. It’s my secret. And I don’t want to stop.
I don’t know if I would really say […]
My parents have been going through a messy divorce. Found out my dad was having an affair but he ended it. there was a trial. my mom wanted a restraining order on my dad so he wouldnt be able to see her or my little brother. she said he was dangerous. he’s not dangerous. i have people who have only known my family for probably two years trying to tell me that i dont know my dad at all and even worse that they do. i do know my dad. he ended the affair, told my mom about it but mom lost her mind. she’s […]
Depressed Hispanic ( my story, maybe your life is my life in another body)
written by Alreadyscrewed
Hi boys and girls, my name is Nathan. I suck and fail at life. I hate this bullshit, i’ve been struggling with this life for so long. I’m just 21 go to university, i’m studying to become an elementary school teacher. My intelligence is too low to get something higher than that. When i was little i was planning to become a doctor, i dreamed about being so many things but God made me a loser, he didn’t gave me a talent and that’s why no one is interested in me. I fail in everything but the worst is that my lack of talent is not the only reason, […]
I got the suggestion of having one day of being completely truthful and to be honest…I couldn’t do it. I’m scared of what people think of me and how they will react. I know I should only care about what I think of myself but I don’t and to be honest, who does? So I’ll be honest here, I’m going to vent and say some things that I’ve never told anybody. So I guess here goes nothing:
I lost the love of my life a little over a year ago because I was stupid and screwed up the whole relationship.
I don’t believe in true love anymore […]
In short, my brother killed himself april of 2011. He was my only brother and he will always be my closest and best friend, a hero of sorts for a little brother if you understand the relationships between siblings. anyway, he was 29 married no children and i was 21. few months after he passed away i was going to shoot myself in the heart with a 12-guage slug to ensure death and hopefully immidietly death would follow. to this day i don’t know what changed my mind, not fear of death but i guess fear for my family’s wellbeing.. but anyway.. i think about him everyday. shortly after his death i became deeply addicted […]
I’ve been on the end of my rope now for about a week. So many things have been going wrong and getting so much worse. The reality of physically not having anywhere to go after I move out of the dorms for the summer is really starting to sink in. I tried to convince my boyfriend that we should stop seeing eachother to make it easier for him when I go. I can really see that there’s no getting better for me. I feel like it would be easier for him if we weren’t together when it happens. He was so confused and it made […]
Nobody knows about my current suicide plans. My family knows about the two preteen/teen attempts but they think I’m all better now. Tell people what they want to hear and… you know the rest. The third attempt they may have found out about except my little brother is listed as my contact and well from what he does for a living I KNOW he will not snitch.
My friend was visiting just to see my place. I rarely have visitors but she kept insisting and since we both dig anime, games, the occult, and dark themed tings I consented. Since I rarely have company I really […]
I am starting to realize no matter what u do in life you will never be able to escape life without all the pain that comes with it. Life will be good there for a while and then I will just be knocked down again like I always do.It always happens. I try to hold on to the fact that things will get better and in a couple of months I will look back and realize life is worth living, but I have gone through this so many times I don’t see any hope. I try to keep holding on, but it is the hardest […]
All the people that know me think that I have a “good life” . Yes, I do have the “good life” yet I feel so unhappy and guilty living it. The parents who love me and who provide everything as much as they can and little brother I adore the most, even with them I feel somehow hopeless. I pity them. I pity myself even more. Theres nothing to badmouth about my life, I`m considered to be the luckiest kid because my parents dont do drugs, there is  roof over my head and food in my plate, good school, good clothes etc.
The friends who are not in […]
I have been through it all. I lost my little brother at a really young age and then after losing him watched my whole family fall apart. My mom started drinking, my dad left our family and i was the main caretaker of my 1 year old sister as I was 7. I started craving attention so i would go find guys to say they loved me. Then one got me into pot. Not saying pot is bad. But it completely changed my life around. I didn’t give a fuck about my family or my friends. Just sneaking out seeing my boyfriend and smoking […]
This might be funny, I don’t know. I’ve been suicidal for weeks (months on and off) and been thinking about it this past days. A lot of reasons why; university, family problems, legal issues, self-hatred blah blah blah. Anyway, I decide to watch a couple of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle episodes out of boredom with my little brother and end up watching an episode called ‘Same As It Never Was’.
Now, I’ve got three brothers and I’d be lying if I said the turtle superhereos don’t remind me of us. So this episode has one of the turtle brothers transported to a nightmare future where their […]
I really can’t take this anymore. I’m sorry to all of you who take offense to me, since you all have real legitimate problems that I want to help you with if it weren’t for my own selfishness and self loathing got in the way. I’m sorry.
I hate my family. I always try to see the good in people rather than be a total pessimist, but I am always proved wrong. I hate how my father comes home everyday piss drunk. I hate how my little brother is treated like a king when he acts like an asshole 24/7. I hate how my older brother […]
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