Tag:

lose

3 years later..

by fallencrescendo 7/6/2015

written by fallencrescendo

It’s been three years since I put up my first post on this site. Now being 21 years old. If I could go back in time and talk to myself in the past and tell her how the future is now I’d tell her just these few things.

You will fall in love with your prince charming. The perfect boyfriend. And you will have the best time of your life. Then have your heart broken, never seeing him again because you just weren’t good enough. But you will meet someone else. And you two will live together in harmony with a black cat who loves you […]

7/6/2015 0 comment

I refuse.

by Nihilism000 6/22/2015

written by Nihilism000

I refuse to be afraid of the future, I refuse to be afraid of death. I refuse to let others harm me mentally or physically. I refuse to be the one people step over. I refuse to let anyone rule my future but myself, I refuse anyone the right to tell me how to live. I refuse all who dare step in my way, I refuse to allow the world to darken my soul. I refuse to be afraid of anyone and anything. I refuse to die with sadness. I refuse to let humanity corrupt me and I refuse to be weak in the face […]

6/22/2015 5 comments

Does anyone know?!

by ruinedownlife 6/20/2015

written by ruinedownlife

a friend told me that he had ******** dissolved but wasn’t able to go through with it. it’s been dissolved for a few days and now he worries the powder has lost its effect. I told him to go to the hospital but I’m worried about what he might do.

does anyone know, if ******** is dissolved but not used immediately, does it lose its effect? if it’s not pure anymore, what would happen if you take it, would you still wake up? would you get brain/organ damage if you wake up? help!

6/20/2015 5 comments

Animals.

by Sammi6xoxo 6/19/2015

written by Sammi6xoxo

we numb the pain but it’s still there
Beneath the surface
We fight for happiness and no one cares
A brutal preface
To a story that no one dares to tell
All too afraid
Of one persons endless hell
End the day
By fucking all the pain away
It doesn’t work
Saying things I shouldn’t say
They’re just words
Playing a game I will always lose
My voice unheard
Find the rafters and hang my noose
Covered in dirt
My soul takes flight before the weary
A small bird
With broken wings always fearing
For the worst
We are all just animals lying in wait

6/19/2015 6 comments

The time is now

by disgusting 6/17/2015

written by disgusting

I have a long weekend coming up since my work is closed Friday. My best friend suddenly isn’t talking to me and the guy I like and have done everything for and spent a ton of money on tells me he’s about to lose everything and be locked up again on the account of being homeless and doesn’t want to see me so fuck everyone for being fake, fuck everyone for not caring about me, fuck everyone my life doesn’t matter to, fuck this world and every last person in it. I’m fucking DONE!

6/17/2015 3 comments

How’s it feel to be alive?

by LostEnigma 6/17/2015

written by LostEnigma

You can hear the sound of my voice, grip my hand, flesh on flesh, and if you cut me I bleed, but I am simply not alive. I’ve had suicidal thoughts since the 5th grade when I watched my grandmother die. I dont know why I didnt cry. Arent you supposed to? Planned and pictured every possible way to end it. I’ve done horrible things to people and I know they were wrong, but I don’t feel guilt for any of it. I hate what I see in the mirror. It makes me want to scream and break things. Why am I so different from […]

6/17/2015 1 comment

Found courage

by loser94 6/16/2015

written by loser94

Well ive finally built up the courage to end it, there zero chance things get better . its like i try to talk to about my problem and ppl including my own mom just toss aside how i feel my depression , everything like is nothing. I just feel alone, im playing to lose.if i feel angry or sad my own family looks at me like i have no right to feel that way . funny thing is me and my mom got in an arguement just now and she wished me death at least she thinks so too . well someones wish is going […]

6/16/2015 4 comments

Starting Over

by RealTalk30 6/16/2015

written by RealTalk30

Can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to start my life over again. Locations, friends, schools, jobs, girlfriends and fiancés.. everything. Starting over use to be incredibly hard. But once you reach that end.. there is most often, a fork in the road. And you must choose a path. Death..or starting over. I’ve reached my end enough times to realize that at the end, you lose a lot of cares. And if you can manage to come back a smarter wiser person, you come back with little to lose..but everything to gain. As long as there is breath in my lungs, my heart will […]

6/16/2015 1 comment

So how is life working out?

by forgetthelies 6/5/2015

written by forgetthelies

Mine is terrible I have this amazing guy who is my bestfriend from preschool. I had to protect him because he had sex once intoxicated so my ex wouldn’t throw him to jail. Cause all he wanted is to be a dick to me because he has nothing better to do in his life. But the best thing about my bestfriend is that he is trying to help me lose weight cause I didn’t like it and he is also very caring about my cutting, I’ve cut my legs so bad that I have a infection in one of the deepest cuts and I have […]

6/5/2015 0 comment

people

by silvermoon 5/31/2015

written by silvermoon

I don’t see hope. I see pain, and a lot of it. I hear voices, and I am exhausted. My life is a couch, and a walk, and sometimes I can eat, and get to places, and sometimes I can’t. No family cares, no church cares, basically, nobody cares, and so I’m saying goodbye soon. Because there has to be some place better than this filthy and disgusting planet full of chemicals and all kinds of horrific things that I can barely stand to live in anymore. The humans have made this planet a waste heap of despair and agony for too many, and I […]

5/31/2015 3 comments

We all lose

by justanothergirl09 5/30/2015

written by justanothergirl09

I don’t know. There’s nothing left to say.

I’m just tired. Just want to leave.

I just don’t belong here.

I’ve never really liked games and life is just a game but the only thing that makes this game different is that we all know how it ends. Everyone loses. Everyone dies.

5/30/2015 2 comments

Throw it all away

by Rotted_Flesh 5/29/2015

written by Rotted_Flesh

It’s funny how easily humans discard one simple pleasure for another, but I guess the brain wants what it wants. They say change is good, and I suppose it is, but nobody can deny the fact that in the middle of that change lies that vulnerability that can sometimes hurt or even kill you. People are so fragile, I know lots of people that say “I’m so emotionally strong” blah blah blah. Take away their confidence, give them a disfigurement or a disability, let them lose a loved one, and see how they feel after. I want everybody to have the same afflictions and I […]

5/29/2015 6 comments

??!

by mranony 5/28/2015

written by mranony

I want to ask but the words won’t come out.

You make me choose between you two.

What do you expect to a child who don’t want to lose both?

I want to help but I can’t. If I did, he’ll hate us and the same thing would happen. And it’ll be worse.

So, I can’t choose. All I can do is hear you out while you vent out all your pain.

But I still want to ask why is this happening to us yet the words won’t come out. And this aggression would be another wound on my body.

5/28/2015 0 comment

I should die

by stolenartist 5/22/2015

written by stolenartist

I cheated on my fiancé with a married man. The married man is the man who sold us our house and puts me to work as an artist.

My fiancé dumped me after finding out. Married man not fully committing and everything hurts. I could lose everything and I hate myself. Why the fuck do I ruin everything?!

I have slept with so many men I am too ashamed to count. Put my children through hell. I have no job. And no man wants me any more. I’m dangerous and exciting but not worth it.

Please something kill me because I need to be put out of my […]

5/22/2015 2 comments

if they find out

by insteadshesaid 5/17/2015

written by insteadshesaid

If they know it’s game over.

But if they don’t I can’t live with myself.

But then again, I could never live with myself.

It’s a lose lose situation.

5/17/2015 1 comment

ten green bottles

by insteadshesaid 5/16/2015

written by insteadshesaid

I hadn’t properly drank for over three months. It’s not like an achievement, the chance just hadn’t come up recently. I guess it has pros and cons. It’s good that I don’t go out on the lash every night, but then when I do drink I have to make up for the lost time. It’s a bad way of handling it, I mean I could just not drink at all.

But, the thing about drinking is it’s similar to that at feeling I long for to not feel anything at all. You can just lose it all, not have to care about stuff, it’s addicting.

It was just me […]

5/16/2015 5 comments

at my best

by worthless_loser 73 5/6/2015

written by worthless_loser 73

It’s interesting how when you have severe depression, regret is your constant companion. I remember when my depression was just mild. Regret was there, but it was fleeting. There were moments when it was actually gone.
These days, hopefully my final days, regret is there with me every step of the way. If only I had done this. If only I had said that. If only things would have happened this way or that way.
One of my recurring regrets is that she never got to see me at my best. Oh how I wish that she could see me now. Touch me. Hold me. […]

5/6/2015 3 comments

Living the life…

by Cheesecake 4/30/2015

written by Cheesecake

I’ve been on the same routine now for almost 3 months now. I wake up, have a shower, go to college, and think about nothing else except taking my own life. I barely manage to get out of my own bed. I don’t feel motivated to do anything anymore, and I’m hanging by a thread. Loneliness and misery is all what I have left. I have no friends, no girlfriend, my family doesn’t give a rat’s ass about me. I’m all alone. The only thing that manages to make my face light up is food. The only time I feel happy is when I eat. […]

4/30/2015 2 comments

An offer

by cephalus 4/28/2015

written by cephalus

I will buy you this book, I don’t have a discount, there is nothing in it for me other than the interesting perspective I think it might offer you.

Its called “This is How” by Augusten Burroughs. The description is:

If you’re fat and fail every diet, if you’re thin but can’t get thin enough, if you lose your job, if your child dies, if you are diagnosed with cancer, if you always end up with exactly the wrong kind of person, if you always end up alone, if you can’t get over the past, if your parents are insane and ruining your life, if you really […]

4/28/2015 6 comments

Is it worth it?

by TheRoadSoFar 4/26/2015

written by TheRoadSoFar

Is it worth it to be sad for loving someone who doesn’t love you back?
Is it worth it to hear all about how much she loves that guy, when in reality all you want is for her to love you?
Is it worth it to hear every single day about that guy that she loves so much, just to not lose her friendship?
Is it worth it to be everyday, every hour, at her side, faking to be okay, when in reality you’re in pain?
Is it worth it to keep the fact that I love her so much as a secret so that […]

4/26/2015 7 comments

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