Ive been through so much in life and have never been this low…im so broken idk what to do or who to talk to im alone in a place i dont want to b… :'(
From the moment we met I knew I wanted to be with you
There was no one else but you
No one could make me smile but you
No one could take the pain away but you
These 4 years have been amazing because of you
But we have had some rocky paths due to me and you
Lately I have been feeling very low because of you
We have good and bad times because of you
When I have urges they are taken away because of you
I want to live because of you
All I do is for you
I try to be brave because of you
I don’t know if I would still be […]
So.Next week I’ll have my final and the most advanced exam. So I know it’ll be little hard. I’m depressed and I can’t remember many things. But I know I will pass with just low grades. But, when can I do what I love to do? I hate this formal advanced education. I’m facing exam that I don’t want to be. I won’t be who I wanna be. I’m forced to do my family wanna see. See you later people. I just do best as I can. Hopeless what to do next..
I use the word attempt because I don’t want to succeed.
I’m too weak to actually plan on dying.
But, I feel like if things continue the way they are, then nothing will change.
I’ve been depressed since I was 8 years old, and I’m now 15.
My mum took me to the doctors for low mood and I got referred to counselling.
I haven’t been diagnosed with depression, but there’s no doubt that I have it. I stopped going to counselling because it just wasn’t helping.
I feel like a suicide attempt will mean getting help. I’ve talked to the doctors with my mum three times now and we’re getting […]
You ever felt that low that you don’t even know how to cope anymore well I’ve reached that low now. It hurts that I’ve reached this low, I’ve made so many promises not to self harm again but I don’t know if I can keep them anymore. Hell I don’t even know what to do anymore please anyone if you’ve got any advice on what I can do to help myself please.
i need a stranger to talk to. I cant do this anymore.
I had this dream about two weeks ago. I was on a boat going down these really peculiar canals. the river was narrow and everything was really low. There were platforms either side of the river, then tall walls along each side. But it didn’t make you feel enclosed. At the top of the walls you could see the blue sky, the walls were all pastel colours and had origami trees next to them. It had me so relaxed.
I wish I had that dream again.
I fell through
Down into the blue
The tide’s taking me away
I know I can’t stay
It’s been nice to know you
But I have to go too
Don’t we all?
After we’ve had a fall
And I’ve fallen too low
So now you know
The extent of my sorrow
It’s longer than tomorrow
You’ll hear me cry
Forever till I die
Hanging loose
From a noose
One thing I noticed recently is my life resembles a hailstone, i.e. severe ups and downs. There’s actually a way to represent this mathematically (and yes, I am going somewhere with this!)
Take any natural number N. If N is even, divide by 2 (to obtain N/2); if N is odd, multiply by 3 and add 1 (3N+1). Repeat this sequence.
I’ll work out a brief example. Let’s start with 3:
3 is odd, so we multiply by 3 and add 1 to get 10.
10 is even, so divide by 2, to get 5.
5 is odd, so multiply by 3 and […]
Let me know if you relate, because I’m pretty sure I’m the only one. This is how I feel, and I really contemplated sharing. So here goes:
My life has entirely consisted of me striving to be the best child I could possibly be. I didn’t sneak things. I always listened to my mom. I was the perfect kid. Until I made a friend at my school. She was a good kid, but thought she wasn’t. She fooled herself and got away with anything because her parents just thought it was easier to just let things go. Just letting things go caused her mom to […]
So off track, I don’t know how to get back.
I know what is awaiting me.
I’ve done it all before – an impossible task.
I am so alone, yet I have no motivation to open up.
The journey has to end – I can’t live this way.
There are some things I just cannot accept.
I had a whole year to self destruct, and that, I did.
It really is the only way I know how to cope- I don’t have anything else.
I’ve done so much damage to myself.
I walk in silence, barely resembling the person I once was: full of spirit.
I wake every morning needing to die again.
I sometimes have nightmares.
I shouldn’t fight […]
hey folks, wow, what a crazy, emotional day.sun has gone down,the ex has left, and the anxiety has eased somewhat. we were able to get the big stuff out, and now can cocentrate on the little stuff. the important stuff is safe. how sweet the quiet. how sad the heart.it was good. my son and his girlfriend came and helped. the ex did not bother to tell me that they were coming. totally lost it when i saw him. he was great and really enjoyed having them here. embarrased of course.no self confidence or esteem. basically feeling pretty low. but also relieved. some of the […]
Unlike most of the people here, I am undecided on whether I want to end my life. It is definitely at the forefront of my mind, but I don’t think I want the finality. But I know that I cannot continue on with life as it is. Circumstances, however, mean that I can’t change it.
I am a single mother to a 3 year old boy, whose dad has minimal contact. Recently, I’ve been finding myself sleeping with just about any man who will take an interest just for a bit of affection, after many major rejections from men this year, and to patch up the hurt […]
It wasnt always like this…. Growing up I thought I had the world, I had parents that loved me and loved each other… I had friends that no matter what where always their for me. Growing up I was always shy, and had low self esteem. But it didn’t get to me until I was 15. My mom cheated on my dad, she now has a new boyfriend who is mean. I lost all my friends, I pushed them away. I became depressed, suicidal, cutting myself, getting high, drinking, I wanted to die. I hated myself. I planned to do it multiple times, but every […]
Am I the only one that doesn’t want to have to depend on medication to be the rest of my life? Because I went to the doctors the other day and he said that I’m going to have to be on medication all my life. And if I don’t take my low doses now then my suicidal thoughts will just get worse… I don’t want to have to depend on medication all my life… 🙁
My desire and motivation have been very low for the past couple of years that I have been called “depressed.” I couldn’t go to college for more than a couple of weeks before I started skipping and realising that it was just like high school, where it seemed that the aspirations of everyone were to get drunk and make stupid decisions, which I had a difficult time understanding. (If they hated consciousness so much, why didn’t they commit suicide?) What is the point of living past high school anyways? I always liked learning, but that’s proving to be more trouble than it’s worth. With the […]
I downloaded Metallica’s Ride the Lightning album last night after falling in love with an 8-bit rendition that was posted to Youtube. While washing the dishes this morning before work, I put the album on and was immediately taken in by the energy that the wall to wall sound of early Metallica radiates. Great album top to bottom, but the standout track is Fade to Black. It’s not enough to read the lyrics; you have to go listen to the song and hear Hetfield crooning to really feel the weight of the words. He had this to say about recording the track:
“I wrote […]
I had a surprising bout of anger, nearing a temper-tantrum, this morning. And what was it over? My missing hairbrush. Yeah thats low.
Its about the only thing I keep in the bathroom, it even has my name sharpied on it. I know it was there yesterday,when I didnt need it, but it isnt there today when needed it.
Thats my life. Things are there when I don’t need them & gone when they’re needed. Mostly that’s because other people use my stuff, even though it has my name written all over it, & they dont care & they dont replace. Its not like I can replace […]
When you’re feeling low.
Aint got someplace to go.
Never despair,
Just sit in a chair.
Try not to cry,
You don’t want to die.
LIve one more day,
Look for a way.
If it’s lonely you are,
Love might not be far.
Just try and live,
You have something to give.
Love will find you,
Whatever you do.
Never give up,
Never lose hope.
Just find a way,
A way to cope.
Hey. This is my first post ever. I don’t really know how to put my situation into words so I’ll just type and see what comes out.
I have been battling depression for about 10 years now with several highs and lows. I had my first suicidal thoughts when I was 11. I felt useless and lonely although I had a few friends that I loved and a nice family. But I felt so out of place and like all I did was wrong. I started to hate myself and my self-esteem crumbled. I was able to hide it until I was 17 but then I […]