I don’t know if anyone else has to put up with this but my closest relatives don’t take my Major Depression and PTSD seriously. Even with prescription medication they still act as if it’s no big deal. They act like I’m just being “selfish” and I think it’s partly because they are largely responsible for some of the most awful psychological and physical abuse to begin with. Sometimes I get the impression they’d prefer it if I died.
Major Depression
hello blog.
this is my first post.
i struggle with anxiety and major depression.
i’m not sure how to cope with anything. my parents misraised me and i have no friends.
everyone hates me and bullies me and thinks i should just kill myself, so why the fuck shouldn’t i..
all of my ex boyfriends said i was worthless and should.. so.. yeah..
nothing’s alright. i constantly feel the need to cut myself.
i constantly feel the need to tie a noose and hang myself.
i constantly feel the need to die. i’ve lost everything.
i don’t have a family, i don’t have friends.
my parents gave me up 7 months ago and made it […]
So many words and feelings in my chest….it hurts to try and push them out. I feel so sick and volatile. I just wish I could scream at everyone around me and burst into a million useless pieces. I keep thinking you’re here, when you’re gone into a forever I’m not capable of really knowing. I wish I could forget, and wash away with the roadkill.
I want to escape this pain so bad, all of this darkness that overwhelms me. I wish I could be free from these chains of regret, remorse, major depression, and saturated loneliness. I can’t commit suicide, which hurts even worse. My family […]
I’ve read a few stories of sexual abuses, and I can relate. I guess that’s a round about way of putting it. After finding myself with no place to live at eighteen, I joined the Marines. After boot camp, I married my high school sweetheart, who then had an affair with my neighbor while I was at work. Shortly after discovering that, while working through a law suit, I had to then work through no pay due for three months… Begging charities to put food on the table for my wife who was sleeping around behind my back.
I meet a new woman, who’s the love […]
Im 60 years old, was married for 25 years, 3 kids, 5 grandkids. Been divorced for 4 years now. Divorce was difficult since kids sided with the mother, but have since come back around. I was somewhat emotional about divorce but more upset about kids. Been dating since and has had its good and bad. 2 years ago I met a lady that rocked my world!!! She is awsum. Problem is I wouldnt commit and I messed up by pushing her away somewhat during a major house buying and renovating project. 2 weeks ago she dumped my sorry ass!!! I am devasted, been crying like […]
I’ve felt this way for a long, long time. Kind of been going thru the motions, doing what others (or I thought others) expected. Â Going to school, getting a job, married, having kids, etc. Just didn’t seem to care. Â Got divorced a couple of years ago, haven’t talked or seen the ex or kids since then. Just didn’t care. When I try to rationalize it, it seems like it should bother me. But it doesn’t. Actually, I haven’t seen or talked to my entire family. I just don’t have the connections that you would expect between people that are family. Â Never did, I was always […]
I see how all the teen girls are killing themselves. And I’m scared that i might accidentally kill myself well to be honest i wish someone would kill me right now or i wish i could die from cancer which i might have because i have a brain tumor I’m just waiting for the neuro surgeon to tell me if i have cancer or not. I’m hoping so. But at t the sane times i want kids and i have so much love for other people. I’m a living girl but I’ve had lots of things that have happened to me I’m i guess […]
I’ve struggled with major depression for several years. The time between feeling some level of normal and giving anything for death to free me from this is getting shorter and shorter. In November, I argued with my shrink and therapist that this is my life, and to not allow me from release from the pain was unethical. After when animals suffer, they are put down. No one else knows how depressed I really am. I mask it very well- I go through the motions of a life while feeling nothing but wanting to be dead. If this […]
so here is my story. i have suffered from major depression for more than 30 years. i first remember being suicidal at age 9. my middle school has 3 stories and i would look out the window wondering if the fall would kill me. never tried and never told anyone about those thoughts. tried the pill and cutting thing in high school. i also drank a lot. in college my dorm was 10 stories. i lived on the second floor. thought about jumping from a 10th floor window everyday. never told anyone about those thoughts either. after being married for just a year some heavy […]
To whoever is reading,
I give up. I’m a 19 year old, white, lower middle class, agnostic, who lives in California and I am killing myself on February 12th, my birthday. I’ve felt this way for several months and had thoughts of suicide for years. I already decided how I am going to go. I just felt like telling someone. I attempted suicide just over a week ago but was talked out of it. This time I won’t be.
I’m an exconvict on parole for possession with intent to sell. I’ve hurt so many people. Especially the people closest to me. This will hurt them […]
I honestly have no idea how to work this site, but truth is when I was little my dad tried to kill me and ended up in prison and beat my mom multiple times in front of me. Along with that I’ve been rejected my whole life because I’m quieter then other people. Then of course I fall in love being stupid and stuff so when that happened he was SO in love with another girl and never ceased to let me forget and left me inthe dust. So now I have anorexia, I cut, major depression, and have had suicide attempts. […]
I have been having anxiety attacks since I was six years old. When I was 12 I had my first episode of major depression and at 13 made my first plan to kill myself. At 16 I was diagnosed with clinical depression and at 19 I was hospitalized for 2 weeks. Around the age of 30 I had clinical anxiety added to my diagnosis of long term depression. Now I’m nearly 40 and the pain never ends. Sometimes it recedes enough that I can laugh but I’m never really happy. The latest episode of major depression started four months […]
Its another morning.
I awake. I sob. I’m awake. I’m still alive. I wish I wasn’t.
I suffer from dysthymia, a form of mild depression that is persistent. All I know is down, all I have ever known is down. I also suffer from Major Depression, episodes of extremely severe depression that last 1-12 months at a time. Yes, they put depression in my depression so I can be depressed while I’m depressed. This is called double depression. One of its features is being more hopeless than someone with one form or the other, another is that it is hard to treat.
I also have generalized anxiety. Tons of anxiety all […]
So I was thinking a lot about my life…and how it turned out so far. Everyone that I know thinks I live such a good life, or atleast should. I have such a nice house, live in literally the nicest neighboorhood, have two parents, perfect grades, colleges asking ME to apply to THEM, own my own car, work at an IT job that pays a lot, have perfect skin….
And yet that brings me no joy, I’m missing the happiness from it all. I don’t want that. What am I leaving out from what I already said? Oh yeah…how I was raised in the hood, or […]
If life has taught me anything, its how pointless everything is. If you aren’t rich in a capitalist society your life will most likely be a nonstop living hell until the day you die and there will be very little you can do to stop it. Some people brainwash themselves with religion, some use drugs and/or alcohol, others distract themselves by any means necessary telling themselves someday life will be worth it but that day never happens. Most people die deeply disappointed by life, those that live long enough to be elderly usually just give up and wait for death (visit an old folks home […]
Hi, my name is Tatyana, people call me tatty. As I was growing up everything seemed normal, mom always thought I had ADHD and everyone else said I was normal. But I wasn’t. My mom met the man ad her dreams, so she thought. He was nice, to her. Me.. Well he’d beat the hell out of me. He’s make me bleed, he smashed me so hard he got my blood on the wall and on my bed, I was only 5 years old. I’ve been in 8 foster homes. They were all horrible. Tryed killing myself when I was 7 I over dosed on […]
I’m female, 33. Married, 3 kids (b13, g11, g9), 2 dogs..and a cat who thinks he’s god. I’m a childhood abuse survivor. Physical, sexual and emotional.it was done to me, primarily by my mother. Didn’t have any siblings, father wasn’t around. It seems the sexual abuse hurt the most, though I know the emotional is always there as well. It’s that voice in the back of my head telling me that I’m stupid, fat, ugly, lazy, no one wants me, I’ll never amount to anything. I’m worthless, horrible. I’m only good for sex.
I’ve been a full time student since 2009, but had a breakdown this […]
I stumbled upon this site on accident, as I’m sure a lot of users have. Â After spending a good hour reading through older posts I decided that maybe it was a good idea to share my own story. Before I do though, I would like to request that I don’t get any of those standard responses that you see on most forums. I really don’t want to hear about how selfish I am, or how things will magically get better one day – no offense, but none of you know me and you can’t rightfully say anything about my lifestyle choices. Isn’t the internet grand?
Anyway, […]
2. Year college student. Finished my first year with straight A’s. Got completely burntout.
This triggered a major depression. Have had issues since i was 12- 13. Anxiety disorders, OCD, depression, suicidal thoughts. Also suffering from existential angst. Also inferiority complex and self-loathing
Also have some love-related issues
I seem to be way too exhausted to get good grades this term. The semester just started sso i have the opportunity to take take a half-year leave to recover. In the future however i would just take that as a token of how a massive failure i am. Also i feel that everyone would despise me over something […]