i used to believe in so many things. i believed in happiness. i believed in happy endings. i believed in miracles. i even believed in destiny. but now i don’t even know what the word ” believe ” means. my parents are divorcing and i’m realizing that no one actually really cared about me. not even a little bit. not even at all. because they don’t know understand how much it hurts to be the messed up one. the mistake. the failure. i’ve got no reason to be watched. i’ve got nothing special. i’m just .. broken. i don’t think it’s even possible to […]
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Many Things
I would like to think myself a normal girl.
I know how to be happy, and I have been, and I know it’s possible to be again. I just don’t know when.
I go through cycles, every time I’m heartbroken, I try to take my life. I quite possibly do have borderline personality disorder.
The last heartbreak was half a year ago, and I can’t seem to get over it.
This time it’s different. I don’t think I want to recover. I don’t want to be heartbroken now, and I don’t ever want to be heartbroken again.
I can’t handle it.
I’ve overdosed 4 times already, been hospitalized 6 times in […]
i just start this by saying that iam none ohther than a desparate girl who wants love and affection.don’t know why god have designed my life in such a different way.In my chilhood i used to be a dancer,singer,script writer and even more a cheerful happy go lucky girl.all of a sudden everything changed dramatically.Being only daughter everyone called me lucky.in my 11th class i started my journey towards pain and day-to-day crying.Who knows that a single girl gets cheated from her own friends just because she looked pretty than her friends.i always wanted to smile even at bad situations too,,but see my fate […]
It used to be my favorite day but I’ve lost interest. I loved making people mad but then getting away with saying April fools. My parents are finally noticing how tired I am. But they do nothing to offer help. Ugh so many things going on in my head. It sucks to have an addiction to self harm. Maybe i should ask to see a therapist or Psychiatrist. I’m always depressed and I feel so dead than alive. I actually want help.
So, here is my (quick) history:
I met a girl on the internet, via a social network. We talked a lot and decided to meet in person. We kissed and we did swear love forever to each other. Â She lives ~250km from me, btw. We have been together since then, 4 years now.
A few months ago, we started to fight very often, everyday. We broke up a couple of month ago, but I came after her to try to reunite us again, like we used to. Well, it worked…for a while.
Like my title says, for now, I can’t have both. Though you guys may say that […]
This is not meant as a dramatic post. I just needed to talk to people who understood the kind of pain and depression that can lead to ending one’s own life. For those of you who aren’t sure, take a look deep inside of yourself as well as around you. Suicide is, of course, murder – but it is a strange kind of murder in which the murderer punishes himself/herself simultaneous with committing the crime. The two most important things to ask yourself are: (1) is there another answer? and (2) how many will I hurt by doing this?
I am NOT advocating against suicide – […]
I fail at keeping friends because I seem to push them away and then I get lonely.
I fail at love. I always get lead on and then they disappear like nothing ever happen. And now I’m falling in love with him.
I fail at protecting myself from bullies and just things that I let people to do me.
I fail in my schooling. My grades are always low because I can’t focus while I’m feeling this way..and it doesn’t help that my parents tell me “what happened? Now you are so stupid ”
I fail at keeping my own promises. I promised myself I […]
Suicide? Is some way out of a miserable life. As for others, it seems as if there is no other road but that.
But its wrong, and your vision is blurred. There’s so many things you can do to help yourself, without going to any suicidal facility.
I myself love helping people, and people who WANT to live get their life tooken away everyday. People who have a loving, caring family, die everyday. MORE then half of the whole world is dealing with problems, and a bit less then half actually go threw with suicide. The bit that try and don’t make it, they realize many things […]
This is my first time posting lol.. So..Thursday I brought alcohol to school & my “friends” snitched on me. They also snitched on how I was planning on getting high on Friday night & how I cut myself..There’s soo many things I could say as to why I think “my life sucks” but there’s no use;p Keep in mind I’m only 14 lmao..but anyone wanna talk?
“And I swear at that moment, we were infinite”
Is my favorite quote from my favorite book Perks of being a wallflower.
I must have read that book a thousand times, it always use to help me when I felt down, and I had a lot of favorite quotes from the book, that’s my absolute favorite, because I think we’ve all felt infinite at one point or another.
One time I felt like that, is on Halloween when I was really little and I was trick or treating, and I saw the moon and it was big and full and I couldn’t stop staring at it because I thought it […]
When you find yourself hanging on a thread, Grab hold of the rope I’m throwing you and hold on with everything you have…
The stipulations you live under sound like prison, it must really suck to have so many things controling what you have to do and when you can do it… You know its funny when you take a good look around and see who is really in control, all… the reasons why and the excuses show your true power so look at it good and study it till you figure it out… Im just going to tell it like it is, forget trying to […]
This is my first post on this website, but I know I’ll end up coming back here.
I never thought that I would end up on a site like this, struggling with my identity and hurting myself physically and mentally. I feel dirty and shameful and hypocritical. I always tell my friends and anyone who will listen to never never EVER hurt yourself, that it’s a horrible thing to do and that people love them, but when I do it, it becomes something else. I don’t want anyone to know. It’s my secret. And I don’t want to stop.
I don’t know if I would really say […]
I had a thought on the bus today. I can’t remember all of it. But I was listening to some piano music and looking out the window, so many things went through my head. It’s not cold today, but a fresh layer of snow covers everything, it looks like its at least -30 c. I’m sick today. I didn’t want to go to school, but the medicine I had this morning worked enough. Despite staying up tell 3 am, I’m wide awake.
I don’t know why I’m depressed today but I am. I’d rather be alone or with my best friend than talk to anyone today. […]
I am a little bit ashamed i am here now. I am not thinking about suicide again, at least not so often. I just have this constant feeling of being down.
I am sometimes thinking i am not capable of feeling good or enjoying life. I have those episodes of euphoria when something incredible happens and when life surprises me spontaneously. But i feel they are terribly rare. I know i have no reason to be unhappy because i have so many things and new people around me and i even learned to be happy because of others. I also tried to talk about my problems […]
I am feeling so depressed that it seems the only way to relieve the depression will be to commit suicide. I don’t want to die but there is nothing I find joy in despite having so many things to be happy about. My body constantly heats up and I get cold sweats. I cannot take it anymore.
Depressed Hispanic ( my story, maybe your life is my life in another body)
written by Alreadyscrewed
Hi boys and girls, my name is Nathan. I suck and fail at life. I hate this bullshit, i’ve been struggling with this life for so long. I’m just 21 go to university, i’m studying to become an elementary school teacher. My intelligence is too low to get something higher than that. When i was little i was planning to become a doctor, i dreamed about being so many things but God made me a loser, he didn’t gave me a talent and that’s why no one is interested in me. I fail in everything but the worst is that my lack of talent is not the only reason, […]
I’m living a very good life.
I have an amazing wife who is also my very best friend and we explore many things together.
I have a great job that is rock-solid even in a bad economy and I bring home a paycheck that puts me in the 30th percentile of the country.
I have two great kids that I have a positive and sharing relationship with, and I’m very proud of them. They are active in sports, the local Historical Society, are both honor students in AP and Honors classes, and much more.
I have no debt (credit cards, etc), I live in a nice house in a […]
I can’t take this anymore, every new day I live I feel like I can’t take it anymore of this I am fighting to many things I want to take my life!!!! So bad I am starting to hate my family I can barely have a convo with them I feel like they wouldn’t care if I was gone they could live their day like they always do they wouldn’t miss me!!! I am battle depression anarexia and now suicide I can’t take it I just want someone to talk to but I can’t talk to my family or my friends or the people in […]
I’ve been on the end of my rope now for about a week. So many things have been going wrong and getting so much worse. The reality of physically not having anywhere to go after I move out of the dorms for the summer is really starting to sink in. I tried to convince my boyfriend that we should stop seeing eachother to make it easier for him when I go. I can really see that there’s no getting better for me. I feel like it would be easier for him if we weren’t together when it happens. He was so confused and it made […]
For anyone who read my earlier post about not getting into college, I got accepted because it was a mistake at their end. I thought my life had new meaning and purpose…… Oh how wrong I was. I haven’t felt this depressed and suicidal for months. I am so paranoid around all the other students. I don’t fit in. I probably could if I really tried but I’m a wimp. I’ve simply had enough. I’ve tried so many things to turn my life around and they all end up the same. I was extremely close to stepping in front of a car today but I […]