Im new on this. I feel more alone than ever. when i found this cite, i fell in love with it.
Life sucks!! I hate it so much and i wish to die. I get lied to about everything and feel alone lost and its Hell. I’ve tried mutiple times to die, but then the memories come back on why i shouldnt.. I hate it!!
-Living in a house filled with false emotion
-Day by day the pain growing stronger
-Finally one day comes abruption
-Walking in the cold night every second feeling longer
-Death is nothing more than just a tranquil thought
-Everything going black,colder,careless
-I could have been that kid that random kid that was shot
-Sight fading,mind bending,moving seems weightless
-As I think my finally moments are coming
-A bright light shines on my face
-To think I was knocked out till it started shining
.This is a poem-ish,about one of my memories,basically what happened was that I was living in a house with what I thought was a loving mother, one day overheard “I knew I should […]
I’ve been depressed for about 6 years. Â I’ve been thinking pretty much these thoughts throughout the entirety of that time period- the thoughts becoming more complex and clear or unclear as time passed. Â I’m 18 now. Â It has been especially bad this year getting ready for college. Â The thoughts of moving out and beginning the rest of my life are eating away at me. Â I never really thought I would get this far but I did. Â The fact that I’ve only been here 18 years is killing me. Â I’ve only been here 18 years. Â How can I possibly put up with 70 more years […]
“This fairy tale might be based on memories of the Great Famine of 1315 – 1322, which caused millions of deaths by starvation in Northern Europe. Catastrophic weather patterns produced greatly diminished yields in crops. The resulting calamity hit all echelons of society and many incidents of child abandonment and cannibalism have been documented by the chroniclers of the times.
Into this grim landscape come the innocent children, who are fully attuned to the gravity of their situation. Stripped of the protection and security offered by a properly functioning family, the children must make […]
This was originally a much longer post.
Until I saw other people getting responses whilst you cunts ignored ME.
Thanks for proving me right. There’s no one who gives a fucking shit about me here, either.
Fucking cunts.
A close friend of mine did something similar to this on his page so I decided to try it too. The difference is I guess my suicidal thoughts and low self esteem started long before online friends or dating.
I grew up in a family of eight plus. We did foster care for two kids so there was sometimes an extra girl in the house. I was always biologically the oldest though. If you’ve grown up in a big family, then you probably understand where I’m coming from when I say it’s like survival of the fittest. And when the three oldest siblings are you […]
The only heaven there is, is the one you get to experience for a limited amount of time in life, it usually involves someone else in your life, and the whole time you are in this heaven, experiencing the awesomeness of togetherness and nothing in the world matters but you and the other person. During that time you are creating the hell for yourself, because when that heaven is over and that person is gone, all is lost. There is no going back and the memories of laughter freedom and the truest of friendships will forever bring you the most pain and sadness lonesomeness one […]
If this is what it takes
to show that I’m hurting
then let me die.
If this is what it takes
to show that I want you,
love you,
care for you,
then let me down.
It wouldn’t be the first time you let me down.
When I held the bottle of death,
you yelled, never wept.
Took your sweet time and left.
Gave excuses and never took the blame.
Never accepted being wrong, still it’s the same.
When I needed you,
you never came.
It’s always going to be the same.
So I’ll light another cigarette,
so the smoke will take the scream.
I’ll take the weed if it promises to take the pain,
the regret,
the memories.
Just forget,
they tried to say “You’ll get over […]
My best friend wrote this, while we were bullshitting, smoking a cig.
All she is,
is a midnight cigarette;
slowly burning,
like a heart attack.
Burning out,
on the flesh of her wrist,
leaving marks,
never to be kissed.
Her midnight smoke is burning,
and she choke.
Up the memories of somone long forgotton,
someone lost in her own thoughts.
I’m not even sure how to do all this, I haven’t taken the time to read through everything. I just need to get this out. Now.
I think too much, way too much. I’m a 40 year old female who has thought about dieing since I was a teenager. I guess I’ve always been scared to live. I was bullied horribly in school. I never felt like I was good enough for my parents… But all of that is more than 2 decades in the past. Maybe that is what started my depression. I can’t even remember not being depressed. Now though, I’m on medication that […]
It’s been tiring these past few weeks.. I can’t think anymore.. I just slouch and barely talk.. slouch and barely try anymore.. I just want to let out all of this crying but no matter how hard I try I can’t even seem to squeeze out a tear.. I always taste throw up in the back of my throat.. I can feel my veins on my temples from being stressed.. It’s too tiring.. to be human.. I hate being Human… Everyone saw my scars today while I changed and I was confronted by all of my classmates.. confronted and lectured… I’m too tired to do […]
each morning and evening my thoughts are seized in belief that by finding a reason you became so decieving this pain will ease,and the pressure on my chest relieved making it easier to breathe which is necessary for all human beings
However all the countless calls the miles Ive walked staring up and down the walls have taught me to not expect you to catch my falls but yet you stand beside and watch me crawl
a tiny hole in my heart begins to tear bringing back minutes, moments and memories of dispair. There were times I had nowhere to go and still you left me there […]
Hot sweaty hands slowly moving from my knee.
Swallow down my unease because he promised to love me.
cling to the knife that makes the memories fade.
Old scars and new scars that are all the same.
Hand trailing higher now to my thigh.
The little girl who I once was is now so hard to find.
Burning dirty hands taking away my innocence.
I’ve never once felt whole again.
Trails of blood where his hands once were.
His burning flesh grasping and groping harder.
The blood runs down and mixes with my tears.
And I know that even after all these years,
His hands and any other mans hands are still my greatest fears.
I can honestly say you’ve been on my mind all since i started talking to you,
I look at our conversations all the time, these memories come back to life
And it hurts inside
I remeber when you lied, you said you loved me,
That time when your called me our princess and baby girl
i remeber the simple things, i remeber till i cry
but the one thing i wanna forget is goodbye<3
My life just took an 180º turn.. for worst.
So I had my appointment with the psychologist today. Needless to say that two minutes in and he was already giving me paper tissues. I was crying my heart out. I told him pretty much everything. Concentration problems, trouble sleeping, depression, lack of memories, suicidal thoughts (I explained I wouldn’t do it because of my mom tho). And according to him, I should had seeked help a long time ago, as now I am so deep into depression.
Result from appointment: Tomorrow I have another appointment with the psychiatrist so I can start right away taking antidepressives and […]
i have cried enough tears in my life time,please dont shed any more,
i know what i done was cowardly and selfish, and how ironic the last thing i ever done was selfish
this wasnt a decision that came easy, i have been tormented, for months  now,
but without any hope of me or anyone else being able change the depressive side of this illness.
my life wasnt easy but you all played a part to make it easier than it would have ,
never want you to think i didnt love you enough to fight.
you always have made me so very proud and privileged to be part of your life,
i know you will continue […]
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I had a secret, a dark little secret.
But I told and now I don’t.
He understood ‘cus he’s been through the same.
Little secret has now been told.
Vulnerable like a flower in a storm.
Like a fish outside of water,
I cannot breathe anymore.
I’m scared
I’m broken
I’m lost
Little pieces of me are shattered across the floor
A shattered soul
In this black hole I have no escape
Mummy says I’m too young to be depressed
Daddy already has other two perfect daughters
Friends are clueless
Parts of my past are forgotten
And fuck how I wish I could remember
Hi – I’m a 22 year old girl, and I have had the luck to find someone who is the perfect match for me. If something like a “soulmate” exists, then I found mine, the love of my life. However, over 4 months ago I lost him to amnesia….he’s a soldier and he experienced a very bad psychic trauma, since that he forgot nearly everything about his past and his life. Of course, I was gone too. Over the months some of his memories came back, but nothing about me…I only saw him twice in this condition, and the last time was over 2 months […]
I am a 29 year old male. I have struggled with depression for as long as I can remember. I have attempted suicide several times, I chose to believe that perhaps there was a reason why I survived. As if there a purpose to my existence. However at this point I have abandoned that frail belief and have chosen to give up completely. I can not remember most of my past, the memories are there but they have become so faded and blurry I can no longer distinguish the realities of my past with the vibrant thoughts of my once over active imagination.
The first attempt […]
Im excited.
No, really I am.
I’m going to Miami in a couple of days. It’s for my dad’s work and my cousins wedding. I’m going to see me family. im going to get out of this cold weather. Im going to see my cousin have the best day of her life.
Buuut, I’m also going to have to wear a swimsuit.
And, see my grandmas face fall when I walk in.
She doesnt like me that much. I’ve heard her say so. She doesnt approve of my “lifestyle”. She says Im a slutty, skater, who has no self control. I’m also a mess, bad example, and a future druggie.
Thanks […]