Lately it seems like everything is falling apart. I used to be so into church. God was everything to me. I finally got married to the woman of my dreams. I had a crush on her since i was just a boy. Everything seemed to be going great. We were married on July 28th 2012. Almost a year now. I had a great job, was a member of a wonderful church, and things seemed like they couldn’t get any better. Then i lost my job last December just before Christmas! Everything started to go down hill from there. Things seemed like they were going to […]
I love my wife and Kids, but I am as low as I have ever been. Â I lost my job, and this forces us to move to a new town. Â My wife resigned her job, my kids 7 and 5 will enter new schools and we will be on my salary alone. Â The pressure is killing me. Â I have never been so close to ending it all. Â I have a new job, I have a good new job, it’s hard for me to see it. Â I’ve been so low for so long. Â My kids bring me joy, that’s why i don’t end it all.
I feel […]
My boyfriend and I have had a relationship for 9 years. It has had it’s wonderful moments.. but it has had many bad ones too. I get so angry with him for his lack of care and concern. I’ve thrown him out recently and now I feel as though my entire world is gone. I have no desire to even want to wake up! EVER AGAIN! All i have ever wanted was his love. I’ve had people tell me he loves me. I’ve heard hims say it. But I have not felt it in such a very long time. […]
I finally got a job, which is wonderful. It’s helped me get out of the house, fill up my time, keep me busy and not feel so lonely. But the thing is… they are all so judgemental. It brings me down sometimes, I mean if they are talking about others like that, what are they saying about me?
First things first, I am a cutter, however I have always cut my legs, and the ones on my arms are done in such a way that they are either hidden or they just look like an accident. Anyway, there was a girl working for us for about […]
I am 17… And I completely hate my self … I hate the fact that I am black , that that I am female that I am tall…. That my mind is the most perverted thing in the world…. But I am so loney… I am not looking for sex just some one who I dont have to talk to, some one who gets me completely… Who shares the same view point of the world… I have a best friend and others friends but I can’t get my self to actually care about them … If they died today I wouldn’t even care….I had this […]
I lost my new job. Have no car. My family has disowned me. I have no car and live in a motel with my bf who also recently lost his job. I don’t do drugs, I hardly ever drink, I’m honest and kind. But I am bipolar and diabetic and ADHD and depressed and probably have personality disorder. I am stubborn but very sensitive. I’m so tired of being stressed and broke and scared and feeling worthless to the world. I hate how others gladly walk all over good people and mistreat them for their own success or profit. I’m sad. I sometimes dream of […]
I’ve had bouts of depression throughout my life. However, I was at one point and recently married, happy, and hopeful. Â Then one day the dark storm approached. My wife admitted to having multiple affairs, one in our first year of marriage (6 years total), and one that was still currently going on. There were other men in the middle. Just a month before this, she was talking to me about having children with me. Sending me baby names, etc. It was blue sky for me at that time… maybe a cloud or two. Once she told me, I thought I could fix the problem […]
I last posted about a year ago. I was confused, my life sucked, I hated my job, and who I was, but I still had an awesome girl who loved me, and kept me going. I managed to pick myself up, got a new job which I actually enjoyed and was good at. I had plans to be happier, she helped me through it. In keeping her happy, in living for her, I was happy. Now however, that has all changed.
A couple of months ago, she left me for someone else, weeks after I had blown my entire paycheck on her birthday. My life spiraled […]
If you have read my last posts you know how I got here…
Yesterday I lost my new job. The job was not for me, but it was a job. I have been so morbidly depressed over the loss the new life I had found, the loss of my home, and the loss of my things, being trapped living in a hotel room, I tried to work at this new job. It was not a fit for me. Under normal conditions I would have made it work, but I simply could not. I literally tried to hide my tears back throughout […]
I just cant see a reason to go on.
I have lost everything in the recession. I was lucky and found a new job in a new place. I found a job I loved. I was a respected professional. I was doing so well. Had my life back on track. I befriended a coworker. We were both in a new city and both new with the company.
I had a new home with a yard for my dogs. Slowly our friendship grew and we both helped each other to do amazing at our new jobs. I started […]
Instead of trying to achive something I rather smoke weed and not think about anything. I dont even know what I’m afraid of. People. I’m pathetic.
I told myself I would work since I have about 1000 euro in Debt. Instead I’m just sitting here, numb. Not wanting to do anything. Im fucking pathetic.
I was supposed to start my new job next week. I called and emailed them. No response. Im guessing they dont want me anymore. Must be because I’m ugly as fuck.
I feel betrayed by someone I miss deeply. I hate it when people dissapear, without any clue. Id rather have someone telling […]
I am. I’m just so unbelievably tired. I’m tired physically, I’m tired mentally, I’m tired emotionally. I don’t know why I’m here, I’m not sure I’ve ever known why I’m here. There doesn’t seem to be one person who honestly could not live without me. I have no friends. I had one. She was like a sister to me. She got on my nerves, she drove me crazy, but she was always there for me. She kept me grounded. And now, she’s moving on, and it’s obvious she’s moving on without me. She got a new job, she has a new boyfriend.. I want to […]
I’ve spent a long while thinking about my decision. Life just is just shit for me and it always will be. Shit started when I was 6, when I just came to Ireland with my mom to meet my da, I honestly had no memory of him before, life got bad when he entered it. It was a bearable kind of bad though. My sister was born later, after a while I got used to him beating my mom. It was bearable. When I turned eight and he got his new job, I dont know why but he began to turn on me as well […]
i don’t know why i decided that writing everything down was a good idea. let along on the internet. i guess on here nobody knows who i am and its not somewhere where somebody from my end can find it.
i am a selfharmer/suicidal. have been since i was about 16. i am now nearly 20. it started when my bestfriend died in a car accident. i started self distructing a couple months later. i could not get over her death. then somebudy noticed, a teacher, he threatened to go to the school welfare co-ordinator unless i talked to him. so i chose to talk to […]
The unfairness of life has become unbearable, and so I need to end it.Â
My beautiful mother became ill, bed ridden for 7 years. The routine for taking care of her, was to clean her, feed her, even wiped her soil, everyday for 7 years. I was a 12 year old girl when it started.Â Then when I turned 15, I worked as a janitor just to put food on the table and buyÂ medicines, hopeful that she would get better.Â But she didn’t, and died a withered shell of a person.Â Then, my father became ill too.Â The same thing happened for another 7 years.Â […]
It was valentines day, the day of love, and it was perfect. Things went on normally as they do, except everything was just so much more happier. Because as i had suspected, it would all just go down the drain instantly. Like it always does, i can’t have a great day without something twisted and messed up happening. So it’s 6:30pm and i get back from my new job i was working at [I just got fired from that job as well]. I get called into the residential advisors office because he was looking for me, really, really bad. I thought i was in alot […]
right im 22, i live in england and this is my story.
i met the girl of my dreams and we fell in love and after 8 years she is leaving me
i just dont know what todo anymore i feel like my whole life has just been flushed away and im losing everything. iv gave so much up for her and now im having to start all over again.Â originally i lived in newcastle then i had to move to london with my parents and i had to start over again and there i made friends and stuff then a few years later i met this girl […]
I tried to invest my 401k myself (some say gambled) and lost allot and now I cannot retire. I lost my job and my wife diagnosed with cancer could not get healthcare except Cobra which ends soon. I did get a job recently and my wife should get healthcare if all goes well. My son has two DUI”s with drugs will go to jail at a young age. I am having terrible depression anxiety coping over the 401k money loss as I could end up penniless if the new job does not go well whereas I could have retired today or just had […]
Ever since I was little, I always felt left out.Â I always felt that way because any time I tried to be social and fit in I’d get burned.Â I am 24 now and the depression is sinking in ever deeper day by day.Â From when I screwed up my first true relationship with a girl whom I believe I was in love with and shared deep emotions with.Â Ever since then my life has spiraled down.Â I lost my job at the same time that I broke up with her, and I made things worse by constantly bugging her.Â I went through drinking heavily […]