i found this website by searching for ways to overdose on pills so i decided to make an account to see if it would help but, now from reading other posts from people that are around 30 and over that i cant relate to in debt and what not, it just makes me feel even more alone. I’m only 13 and i really shouldn’t be deserving any of the crap i get. I know that people have it worse than me but right now, i should be worrying about boys and whatever a 13 year old girl worries about, i shouldn’t be worry about hiding my scars. […]
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Parents
So I’m 18, a senior in high school, and although most of the drama in my life revolves around my anxiety and eating disorders, family problems, or suicidal thoughts, for once I have a normal problem. Just typing those words felt fantastic. I have really strong morals, I’m honestly not sure why because it’s not something I learned from my parents, but I don’t know, I just do. I also have pretty high standards when it comes to guys, although I’ve had a few boyfriends I’ve always felt like dating in high school is pointless, it’s just setting you up for a broken heart. I […]
lat night , i broke down , and cried my eyes out , thinking of everything that’s been happening , and i grabbed my picture frame , and threw it against the wall , it broke , and i sat down by the glass , and stared balling my eyes out even more ,  i put my hands down and felt glass all around me , from the mirror i broke earlier ( i usually brake things to keep me from taking out out on myself , ) and so i sat there and started slamming my writs into the glass ,  and i stared bleeding , a […]
Death looks pretty attractive right now. The other night I went up into my attic looking for some guns my parents have been hiding. I fell through the attic and busted up my leg pretty good. Needless to say I feel even worse now. The last two days at work I haven’t been able to stop myself from crying. My supervisor gave me an extremely simple straight-forward assignment and I can’t do it. I can’t focus or concentrate on it. I’m stupid and worthless and lazy. I don’t deserve a good career. I don’t even deserve a bad career. I deserve no career. I fuck […]
Today, I turned 18 years old.
On my 16th birthday, after crying myself to sleep, I vowed to never cry over my family again. Instead of focusing on all of the things that were destroying me, I focused on the diet I had started about 10 days prior. It took control of my entire life. By July I weighed less than 100 pounds, my bones stuck out, but I still wanted to be skinnier. I rarely ate, but when I did, I made sure to throw it up.
I started recovering last summer, June 2012. It went well for awhile, but once school started back […]
Life is just so hard.. I don’t understand how anyone can do it with a genuine smile on their face. Do people really truly feel happiness? My life really isn’t that bad, I have both my parents who care about me, a loving boyfriend, and am currently in high school. It’s just that everyday is a struggle.. I wake up in the morning with such an empty feeling, like a hole in my heart, and I wish I could just sleep and never wake up again. I feel so alone.. I just want someone to talk to.. But even if someone is there willing to […]
I’m done… Just wished I had a gun right now, so I could kill myself. I hate my life. I FUCKING HATE MY LIFE!!!
I’m NOT happy, I never was and I’ll never be. My parents don’t understand me, they only make me feel more worthless and lonely, like I’m a piece of trash, a mistake. Constantly have arguments with them because they don’t understand me. Therapy doesn’t work, medications doesn’t work. I’m just desperate… Don’t know what to do anymore. The only way out I see is killing myself, and actually it’s a pretty good option for me I guess. What’s life worth when […]
Hello sp,
Two days ago I did something horrible, something awful, terrible if you will. I got drunk. Now, that might not seem that bad in and off itself, so let me elaborate: it wasn’t at a bar. It wasn’t with friends. It wasn’t even on my own like I often do. No, it was in a restaurant. With my family. The drunkest I have ever been. Blackout drunk. Throwing up drunk. Unable to walk drunk. All off the wine they bought for themselves. My mum had to help me walk home, that much I remember. I don’t remember what happened after we got home, […]
Drugs. That’s what caused all this. There is lump in my throat telling me i dont think anyone will truly understand the absolute s**t it does to you, but who knows. So here is my story..
*Note* I am deeply ashamed of this, and i try to forget about it as much as i can. (i have not re-read this because it was hard enough writing it, im sorry about any spelling mistakes)
Grade nine was my first year of school ever (i was home schooled) so walking in the doors of that high school healed a lot more then desks and teachers, it healed experiences. I didnt know where […]
i wish i can drink alcohols and get drunk, forget everything for a while.. but i cant really drink it.. i always puke.. wish i can sleep all day and hav beautiful dreams instead thinking of how miserable my life is.. i hate my parents i hate my brother i hate my environment i hate my life i hate everything.. my parents sucks.. they always see things different than wad i see,, and their financial sucks too make it worse.. i always see tht im less than my brother.. its not like im comparing myself to him.. but the fact tht he went to expensive […]
I dont understand, but recently, I hate everyone an everythhing bar a few very personal items. I have facebook and everything on it. I hate all my friends, and I hate my family. I am not sure what started it, but this hatred/disgust, annoyance/pity just fills me when I get around them. Its not one of those hatred that makes me want them to die, but that one where if i had the option to leave I would and never look back. Im just done. Eerything seems like crap nowadays, and I cant bring myself to care about anything bar my parents, my dog and […]
Today my parents are away, so I think I can hang around here not being afraid they’d be peeking into my laptop. And I can ask this silly questing, how do I do it? How do I get diabetes?
And don’t ask what is up with me, ’cause nothing is up. I just still can’t figure out the trick. So many people get it just out of the blue, without ever trying to. I know it has a lot to do with heredity, but not always the case. If it doesn’t run in my family, so I can never get it? I don’t believe it. There […]
I’ve struggled for a very very long time, and since i were young i’ve been depressed..
-Always bullied, abused and threatened..
When i were young up till today I’ve been going trough mental and psychical abuse., At my elementary schools i oftenly got threatened with knives and to be beaten up. A few times they even beat me up, hit me in places people couldn’t see the bruises on, and said If I’d tell anyone they’d cut my throat..
I tried to talk to people about it but always got laughed at and they said I’m just making things up, no one is doing such a thing to […]
How my life has changed these past months. I have officially stopped cutting for awhile now. I feel weird sometimes because i know that people can see all my scars and they immediately judge me, but dont say anything and i feel like maybe i shouldnt make other people uncomfortable like that..
Ive had my ex, the one from before, ask me back out and i couldnt do it, i had a really good friend ask me out too and it was awkward because i couldnt bring myself to tell him no to his face, i never answered him, I feel really guilty now. Im currently […]
This is the first time i write about my suicidal thoughts on the internet..I have no financial problems, so financially speaking i have a life that many would want. I’m also still young, many people tell me that i have my whole life ahead of me and that i shouldnt be pessimistic..but i have never had the life i really want. I didnt have many friends untill recently, and that was only because we share a habit which is drinking and smoking pot..i have thought about taking my life for many years now, i was even seriously planning on doing it one time but i […]
I kinda made this profile because I wanted to tell someone my life story… And I don’t have anyone close to me that I want to share it with. So I am writing it here, anonymously.
But let’s take it from the beginning:
I’m a boy from Denmark, 19 years old at the moment, but that is not where my story starts. My story starts all the way back when I was a child. You see, I have always been bullied, first by the bigger kids in my kindergarten, then by the kids in my class in school. Therefore my parents quickly decided to teach me […]
Hello there,
I’m not really sure how this is done so I suppose I’ll just go ahead and start off. (I apologize if it’s hard to follow.)
Uhm, well, I was actually raised relatively well, all things considered. Both parents were present, working, and in healthy condition. I was also the only child within the household.
Life was pretty privileged, normal, but rather quiet, as everyone mainly kept to themselves in the household. There weren’t any major conflicts or fights, and alot of my time, along with my father, was spent on the Computer, whether it ranged from activities such as educational programs or games or whatever I used […]
I feel like everywhere, every day I’m constantly being lied about how much others care for me being alive. Deep down no one really cares what happens to me. It’s all a lie. Everyone is a hypocrite. They act as they care because they’ve been taught to do so. I feel like no one can help me or more like no one wants to do anything. I know I shouldn’t expect others to do what I can’t do for myself, but it would just be easier if people would support the only options I have left. I want to die.
No one is there for me […]
I know that this isnt very important but lately I’ve been over thrown by life and all that comes with it. The money problems? It’s too hard, I’m only in high school.. My parents? They hate each other so much.. It’s not fair they couldn’t be perfect.. My friends? They don’t exist. I lost them. My boyfriend? He dumped me because of my issues.. He’s happy with another girl. And lucky me I get to see them every day. I wish I could care less. I’ve tried, oh have I tried. I care too much. Every little thing eats away at me. When will I […]
Just told my ex, that’s also my best friend, that I’ve lied to him. Luckily he wasn’t mad at me, actually, he understood it. I was really glad with that. But the thing I really wanted was not saying it to my ex. That I shouldn’t done it, because I never lied to him. That’s what I really wanted, but it’s not the truth. I have so much regret of all the times I lied to him, my parents or anyone else that’s close to me. I have lied so much that it almost felt like my life was a lie. I’m trying to lie […]