I messed up. I messed up big time. I’m ready to end it. My girlfriend is freaking out and I’ve already said my goodbyes. All I have left to do is get my last few smokes in and then do it either by knife or taking as many pills as I can. I’ve lived way too long already. My grandfather died because I didnt call fast enough. I did something horrible to my cousin. I’ve hurt everyone around me. It would be better if I was gone. But I’m scared. I’m scared of pain. I was looking up ways of how to do it and […]
Tag:
ready
guys, im ready to leave, thank you alll xx
It’s been a while, although it sits at bay ready at a moments notice. Just waiting for the next opportunity to form again. Sad existence. No real purpose. I feel like I suffer so everyone else can continue. When I hear of someone committing, I am not sad. I understand that this place is not for everyone. Read a quote that the noise is too much for some. Or something like that. I’ve got more to say but gonna stop now. I wanna see if anyone relates.
I feel so numb. It’s almost like I’m dead inside. Ive always battled depression, I’ve always had suicidal thoughts off and on since I was very young. It’s different now… I know I’m going to do it soon. And I’m not afraid to do it. I’m not waiting for a specific date or time… I’m not writing goodbye letters, or even thinking about how to do it. I just feel it coming, and when it happens, how it happens, is just as simply not important. Nothing is anymore. I don’t even care how it got to be this bad, or why. I’m not curious, I’m […]
the date has passed
The date I set to die
Reallized I wasn’t ready
Hadn’t gotten my things in order
My room wasn’t cleaned
My suicide notes not perfected
And now I’m sitting here
Wondering if I should do it at all
Should I really give up on life?
Only I can answer that
I don’t want to continue on like this
And I’m too afraid to change
Scared I’ll end up back here like every other time
Scared that they’re right
I can’t do it
I’m too scared to make a move either way
Too scared to change
To scared to end it
I’m lost
I don’t know what to do
I keep waiting for an answer to present itself
But I know the answer […]
I just need to pick a date already. I could do next week on the 11th, it’ll make it a year since the rape. I could do the last day of 2015, or on my birthday in January. I can’t be here anymore. I have absolutely no purpose in life. I think about suicide every single day. I wake up thinking about it it’s the only thing that consistently stay on my mind. I’m in school but I’m pretty much failing to the point where I’m on academic probation. If I do bad this semester there kicking me out. I used to do so well. […]
this song …..
this is about suicide, this is about me, trying to take that step…
-i need help. i don’t know if i want it. i don’t know if i’m ready for it. i don’t know the right way to get it. i just know i need it. i don’t know who i am. i don’t feel like a living person. my mind doesn’t exist inside my body now. i live in an illusion. i feel connected to the world, but i’m alone in a box with nobody else. my best friends don’t exist. they’re maybe out there somewhere but i haven’t met them. i won’t meet them. i’d give anything to meet them and have them in my life. […]
as you all know I attempted suicide on Sep 4th of this year. And went to the psyche ward after being released from the hospital. after being released from the psyche ward, I was ready to take in the world. Unfortunately, it was all a mirage. I’m gonna write down a list of things they did to make things seem like it was gonna get better. They was great people and all, but they just don’t understand people like me.
I just went though a trauma and was forced into a psyche ward
we had a sense of community and constant therapy
I thought I made friends
the doctors […]
I am ready to give up. I wrote a pathetic note yesterday and tried all day to hang myself. I didn’t succeed like many others before me. I am desperate.
I am desperate to go. Considered jumping. Not a freeway like the idiot yesterday on the 101 but a peaceful cliff or a bridge. Where death is certain…
im ready for the void
im ready for the nothingness
my very last breaths
into the darkness
my heart beat quickens
it starts to race
beating slower and slower
to a steady pace
someone runs into the room
screaming loudly
but i can barely hear them
trying to save me despertly
the world around me goes black
this world is not right
drove me to suicide
im now dead tonight
i was supposed to be dead by now but the ATF system was down so i couldn’t buy a gun then i went the next day and it was up again and i bought the gun but they didn’t have .22 bullets so i went to another store and it turns out that there is a shortage of .22 bullets in the us right now i call 10 different stores and finally find a dicks that has some in stock and i go and get them. a couple hours later i prepare for my beautiful death and take out the bullets and line them up […]
Everyday now you hear stories of people who are so upset, depressed tortured, bullied, and how they in their lives so shortly and swiftly and how everyone around them is so effected by their choice and how cruel and selfish they were to take their lives as they did. Honestly, I can’t help but feel like they are the lucky ones. They’re the ones who’ve realized what to do how to help themselves they know their way out. People have always said that suicide is a sin. I want to make it very clear that suicide is not a sin. God would not so harshly […]
There’s no walking out. We talked about the fiery deepest pits of hell. But even above here is also a fiery hell.
I don’t need to open the score anymore. I don’t need to study anymore. Or watch the news. Or take up any examination. It won’t make a difference. The end is crystal clear.
When you said my life would be in the dumps, I didn’t think you were serious.
So that is why my mother never put much hope in me. This life is a mess, and no amount of investment will change it.
That house, this house, that room, this room. It’s […]
I want to do it tonight, but it’s harder on a weekday because of work. I don’t think I can bear this pain until the weekend. I’m miserable. I’m ready to go. I wrote instructions on my leg. I’ll write more on my arm later. It’s a matter of principal. I’ve always said this, the longer I’m alive, the longer people will treat me like shit and feel they have every fucking right to. I will leave my name here as soon before the event as possible. I also have to apologize to my work by email and basically tell off the guy I loved.
If anybody is out there and struggling with transgender or knows somebody battling these feelings and the intense inner turmoil that comes with this: please give me a shout.
hang_u_lang @ hotmail . com
I’m ready to do something extreme. I’ve never felt this degree of panic or anxiety or intense death. Holy fuck.
I am ready to go. My family hates me. I am all alone. I am taking Tylenol and drinking alcohol. I have my letter ready for my parents and society to read. This is all of society’s fault.
What is the best way to die? Please I need to know. The only thing I can come up with is taking a good amount of xanax, let that set in and then lay in a warm bath and slit my wrists. I hate sharp objects but I’m almost to the point that, that is the only way I can figure will work. In a room and time that no one is looking for me so by the time they find me I will be well gone
I’ve tried looking at life from a positive perspective but it still doesn’t change the fact that I’m ready to die. I’m 27 years old. I have Bipolar Disorder. I’m poor. I’m on government assistance. I’m African-American. I’m a woman. I’m extremely overweight. I still live with my parents. I come from a family of Narcissists who have each told me in their own way that they don’t mind if I die. I’ve tried to put myself out there in college and employment but nothing fulfills me. And no amount of medication is going to change how I feel. I’m already taking 4 meds and […]
For most of my life I wished i was never born. I’ve never seriously thought about suicide methods as it was something i thought i couldn’t do.
Last night i felt myself taking a step closer towards the act. Although I’m not quite ready yet, the thought of knowing relieved my pain a little. I could see an end to my misery, whereas before it was indefinite.
I’m not posting this because i need attention. I just have no one to say it to and i need it.