It’s so strange… I mean, the way I feel… Am I depressed? I would say yes, but I ain’t that sure thats the right word to describe it. I got problems, many problems, but I’m forced too much to hide the real me and the things I really feel and I end up thinking that pretending it’s fucking okay for the sake of everyone keeping his quiet balance in his life. That’s fucking unfair, I can’t sacrifice myself just to prevent the people that surround me from breaking their peace.
I can’t convince myself that this is simply my life and this is all about […]
Tag:
Shit
im going to fukin kill myself. i cant do dis shit anymore. im 32, livin wit my sick grandma. n behind in 5 months in rent. i pop pills like candy n do blow liek ders no tomorrew n ther mite not b. ima loser mannn.. death is pretty fuckin cool if yo ask mhe.
I’ve had enough of this pathetic thing people call life. Every time I’m happy, something goes wrong. Also, I’ve gotten past the fact of leaving people behind. I no longer care about that, I just want to leave…and never come back. I want to die to prove to people how bad their words really hurt. Everybody thinks that I’m so happy and carefree, when really I get home, cut every night, and cry myself to sleep. I deal with shit at school from just about everybody, shit with my abusive dad when I get home, and shit when I go to work from my de-humanizing […]
I’m tired of livinq,I wanna qive,qive In Into an attemp.I hope I don’t fail.It suck’s cause I bearly met my new theropist and at first I thouqht he didn’t care but I really like him,It suck’s that I have to disapoint him.If I fail,I’m not qoinq back to the hospital!Today I woke up determinded to do It.I wanna jump In front of a car but then I gave It a lonq  thouqht,how Is It qonna be on the person?I feel like shit,why make that person feel like shit?I’m still practicinq starvinq for Incase If I run away.Who know’s when the next time I’m qonna have […]
Everythings so over whelming now that everyone knows my secrets i dont want to be here , i dont want to have to put up with the pain , My parents are disoppinted , My parents make me feel overwhelmed and scared and alone , i hate that i feel like this , i hate that i wanna be dead , I hate that im putting everyone through this shit ., i want to be dead
Hey I am 22 (just turned) male from UK. Basically I am stuck in life. I never leave  the house because I have nowhere to go, I have no friends and nobody to talk to every single day, including weekends. I am currently looking for work and have never had a job yet (been looking 2 & 1/2 years). I am done with education as its neve rgot me anywhere and I can not receive funding to do what I even want to do.
I am stuck in life, I have no future and no friends, no girlfriend, no place of my own, no transport, no money. I have nothing, […]
what should i post about? this is my first post. i’ve got a couple of saved drafts where i started writing about myself and my situation and things i have been going through but i’ve put them aside for now, probably won’t go back to them. Â i feel ok, almost good at the moment. whenever i read a post from people on this website where they talk about their immediate feelings without talking about whats going on with themselves in the big picture, without talking about the whys and whats and hows, i sometimes dont like it because i want to know about those very […]
I thought i was doing so great. Love is my poison. Confusion is like a knife. The fact i only have guy friends and every girl i know hates me when i’ve done nothing to them.. it hurts. you feel alone. my first love has become a monster. I just recovered from self harm and suicide a month ago and now im falling again. i want to be strong but i feel like i want to take something burning hot to my arm. possibly attempt to bleed again. i feel like everyone just thinks im completely annoying. i let the simplest things get to me […]
About four years ago, my life fell apart with no catalyst. I suddenly realised just how futile my existence was. I was in a job I didn’t enjoy that fed nothing but the pockets of some well seated theatre types, I lived on my own and was miles away from any of my friends. All of my life I’ve felt I’ve never really contributed to anything, materially, socially or emotionally. I was utterly isolated and I knew nobody missed me. Right now, I’m in a different job, living in a flat with a friend who, since moving in with me, has made it patently clear that […]
im 14 years old i just had my heart broken with a guy that abused me and even tho he did i still miss him and i feel heartbroken caus now he has a gf and it was one of my old friends i thought i had people there for me but i guess not all my girls left me caus he never let me go hangout with them i always had to be with him and him only i wasnt allowed talking to other guys and he break up my best guy friend i know i should hate him but i dont……i have scars […]
At this moment I don’t know what I feel. It’s like my chest is being squeezed. I’m finding it hard to breathe. I can’t find the words to express how I feel, neither do I know how to write about them. My mind is empty, it feels like i can’t think anymore and the only thing I feel anymore is sadness, anger, or hate towards myself.
I never cry in front of people and today I cried in school. In front of a bunch of judgamental hypcrites. I couldn’t hold it in anymore, my desire to die is uncontrollable , it emerges at anytime. I […]
All the people who treated me like shit and accused me for bulling in the past wont stop picking on me. I have no job my parents are disabled no one ever seems to help me here in Cornwall. They all talk about how well theyy have it made and how acceped they all are and scream told you so to me. Im probably take my own life at the end of this month because no one knows i even exist yet alone help me.!!!!
I dont know anymore what do to , what do think. My girlfriend had anoxeria and bulimia. She got over it. But the aftermath is that all the time shes somekind of sick and ill. Through the Year she chanced she started to getting annoyed by everythink. and she always say i wanna pick a fight or some shit. we still love each other but i cant go on for over a month i havent seen here and always when we wanna see us there is some problem that we cannot see eachother atm it the problem that shes annoyed and she dont want to […]
Im tired of all of these no offense, but really, jesus-freaks attacking me with i was ‘Put here for a reason, God loves you, Jesus made you….etc.’ I honestly do not care.
Yeah, i have family. yeah i have friends.
But whats eating me inside hurts me more than anything else could.
Its like heartbreak, jealousy, apathy, pain, impatience…everything that hurts put together into one.
I want to die, and i dont care who i hurt, because my grief inside is so much worse.
‘Its just a phase, every teen goes through it’ they say.
Well if i ever get the courage, ill prove you wrong.
Im a greedy, […]
hi, i am new here (sorry about my bad english) and i was hoping that i could finally tell how i feel and maybe.. someone would understand and listen. well, i feel like shit and i don’t fit in to my familys perfect world. my friends don’t take me seriously and my grandfather likes to hit me.
i guess this all began when i was 12 because he hit me for the first time (i am now 18) i don’t know why but my grandfather has always hated me. when i was 14 he told me that i am a pathetic asshole and terrible big sister […]
hi, this is the second time I write, last time I wrote “wanna die”. I still wish I’d just die. just fall over, dead…. I’ve promised a friend of mine that I’ll live untill school starts again, and now I regret. a promise is a promise, can’t break it. my life is spiraling downwards… had to break up with my boyfriend. know it sounds ridiculus, but I’ts true. just realised I was still so in live with the one who dumped me.. he really is’nt even a good person, but I still love him… he know that he ruined the rest of my life whwn […]
I am 28 yrs old. I am your typical white guy. I am married to a beautiful women be she doesn’t live with me.   I use to own a business but with the economy I had to shut down. I have had a rough life I spent 9 yrs in stae and federal prison. I went in when I was 18. I came out reformed and ready to work. I met my wife who was my sisters best friend about 4 months after i was released. I started a moving business and did great with it. i was able to do more stuff with my life in […]
In 7th grade I had the bestest friend you could ask for, but then, she became a band geek and she just drifted away. Then in 8th grade i made a pretty damn good best friend. But then high school came and my bestfriend went to some other school, and everyone just changed. I started to look at everyone diffrently, and all I saw were inconsiderate assholes. Then I noticed the shit my mom was going through: woke up at 5am, worked ’til 10pm every day, no days off. I feel so useless because I can’t do anything to help her. And she works her ass […]
i keep getting medical issues, and in highschool its just tough to deal with. And beyond that i just got diagnosed with bipolar, and i am just tired, but i know in a few hours i will be happy, and fine. I am so happy and then i get so sad, i just don’t know whether living is worth it… i know you are going to say well you’ll be happy, but then i know i will just fall again. And meds don’t work, they make it worse, and counsling does shit… God doesn’t do much either…. so i just am lost and feel done. […]
In June of 2008, I was a stoner, and an alcoholic. I tried comiting suicide by taking at least a full bottle of pain killers. because my mom grounded me. I wrote about it in my journal of course. I believe my words were:
“I wish my mom would understand what im going though, i dont know if i really want to die, i just wanns scare her”
Â
i fell asleep, then woke up with this incredibly uncomfortable feeling. I was burning, like my blood felt weird. and i was getting hives everywhere. my mom came home. I told her i ate bad food and felt a little sick. […]