I have bulimia and two years ago I cut 3 little cuts on my stomach. I’m a 14 year old girl and on terms of being depressed, I’ve managed to keep my actions in check. Something change last night. I got into a fight with my best friend that I have told absolutely everything thing to and he’s been totally supportive but, he just full on changed and was against me and called everything what I did or what I think stupid. Â I know that I cut 3 cuts on my stomach 2 years ago but that’s nothing compared to how badly I cut my […]
Tag:
Stupid
Why do simple everyday people, sit by getting destroyed by their own minds while evil fucks profit from other peoples misery….
Tomorrow morning I’m going to my first counseling appointment with a counselor of my choice who specializes in the areas I need help with most. Scared and anxious are words that don’t even do the situation justice. I’m beyond terrified, but I will be strong and I will not resist help like I’ve always done in the past. I wish I had just one person standing by my side, telling me I’m making the right choice and I will be okay, but I don’t. In the end we have ourselves and that has to be enough.
I have suicidal thoughts pretty much everyday that will […]
Every day I wake up thinking that this day will better than the last, but it doesn’t work that way. Every day is the same crap. Hoping that someone will hire me, but it doesn’t work like that in today’s world. You have to wait and wait and wait hoping for someone to hire when you know they won’t. I have always wondered why interviewers want a hand shake after an interview. They always say they will give a call when they really don’t. To me right there, that is backstabbing. They always act so happy to see you, but never call if you have […]
I’m a liar because I wont tell you everything. I’m stupid because sometimes im wrong. I’m ugly because my face isn’t perfect. I’m a push over because I like making people happy. I’m a loser because I’m a not friend with your group. I’m fake because I’m too nice. I’m weird because I’m not like you. I’m fat because I eat when I’m hungry. I’m clingy because I don’t like to be alone. I’m insecure because I care about what people think of me. I’m no fun because I’m not always hyper? Don’t try to tell me who I am BecauseI already know! </3
They think your crazy, they think your mad… They call you stupid, worthless. Tell you your not worth it… Now your walking back to the place you call home, but you feel so alone. And if they really knew all of those things that you do in your room, to hide the pain… I’ll bet their minds would change…They’d change if they knew the pain…
I am sick of the bullshit that people say to me about suicide. All are invalid or just something they say because they dont know what to say.
“it gets better” – are you personally guaranteeing that? in reality it can also and more likely get WORSE
“someone loves you stay alive for them” – If suicide is selfish isn’t demanding someone to stay for you despite their pain and misery even more selfish?
“suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem” – unless of course the problem is permanent then the solution is perfect. I dont think a temporary solution for a permanent problem is very […]
Like I never thought I’d be the one to be suicidal but I can’t stand my reality and the thoughts I have. It’s really really agonizing and frustrating. Like I think of things that shouldn’t even matter. Like why am I human and why do I have to be human and see other humans all the time. Like humans are stupid and weird. I like weird but its unexplainable. I just feel very very repulsed as a human. I can’t stand it, makes me wanna kill myself everyday but I don’t cause I gotta live for my family and boyfriend. I also can’t […]
Hi people, been like this for as long as i can remember, most of my problems are from me being lazy, i mean apparently a doctor says i’ve got depression too but truthfully i just think its my own stupid fault. I’m a big, lazy fat, 20 year old who spends his days indoors doing nothing, I see you great, amazing people and i wonder am i allowed to complain, you people are having to live through the real problems and i don’t feel like i should be allowed to complain. I’ve wanted to kill my self for such a long time now, though I’m […]
Most people know me as the girl who’s always smiling and laughing. Most dont know I suffer from depression. I’ve wanted to die everyday since I was eight. I have tried to kill myself twice by overdosing and both times i’ve failed. My own boyfriend thinks im crazy and so does my whole family. I started cutting yesterday. I think I did it because no one is there for me. No one wants to listen. The only person I told about my cutting was my bestfriend Sean, but that backfired because my boyfriend was with him. My boyfriend is now sending me rude texts saying […]
I’m a survivor.
A few people in this world, supported a few med pros who taught me how to survive. Last wweek I wanted a dr to put a bullet through my head, over something stupid. I was having a hard time getting through some proocedures. So the dr had to spend an extra five minutes which seemed eternal for me, making certain that I wouldn’t go home and die. A family member, one of about five or six who I trust and stuff the rest of ’em, was understanding, but also disagreed with me at the same time. At least she cared and wanted to […]
This is going to sound cliche, but it’s my boyfriend. I have liked him for as long as I can remember. When we were not dating we were basically best-friends. I told him everything. Â About me cutting, my mom on drugs, and when she said she didn’t care about me. So we talked a lot. One of my friends kept telling him to ask me out and he finally did. June 1st, 2013. I still have scars, although I haven’t been cutting ever since. It feels good to know that you have someone that cares about you. He is everything to me. I couldn’t live […]
no
i don’t drink it
i’m too young to be an alcoholic.
don’t you know that?
it’s just the rubbing kind
that stuff.
i love it.
after i cut
both to continue the pain
and to disinfect
(’cause, yeah, i’m the only cutter in the world who gives a crap about that)
but mostly for the pain
i pour it in the cuts.
i would say it’s like
getting high
but i never have
so i can’t say.
if getting high is anywhere near as amazing as this
i see why people are stupid enough to.
it’s like
fire in my veins
it’s […]
I’ve tried to kill myself  before. No one knows of course. Sadly the entire bottle of pills I took didn’t do anything but make me vomit the next day away. My family just thought it was the flu. They have no clue that I want to die, they don’t know that I hate my self with the entirety of my being. No one knows. I don’t want people to know, I don’t want to be that weird suicidal girl. The one that everyone pities, the girl that no one knows what to do with. I’m now a senior in high school and graduation is less than two weeks […]
I just dont know why i cant get the words out of my mind. I cant forget anything. I remember every single word or name i was called. I remember every punch. I still have the feeling of being terrified every day to do anything and being worried ill do it wrong and disappoint someone. My mind i slowly killing me and its winning. I cant fight for much longer. I hate more when i don’t know a answer to a question. i cant handle being so weak and stupid. I hate when anybody is disappointed in me. I hate me. I cry when […]
my mom is always yelling at me , acting like im stupid ,and that i dont ever know what im talking about . and when i try to talk to her or make a conversation all she does is ignore me . she talks about me to her friends , and my family , and not in good ways . i havent cut or done anything to harm myself . but i dont want it to happen , so i wanna get this out . i hate my life . i live with my mom and step dad , he has money , and thats […]
So…It’s been a cliché to say that you feel that your heart is shattered into millions of pieces because your boyfriend or girlfriend broke up with you, but I have to admit that I’m my case, I’m sorta glad my relationship is over. About two hours ago my “boyfriend” broke up with me because I didn’t text him back…I know, stupid right? But anyways, all he said is “I’m leaving you” and all I said was “okay” and I didn’t burst into tears or jump up and down laughing, I mean, I honestly had no reaction, life went on and I don’t feel horrible or […]
i feel useless to this world. im not good enough for anyone or anything. i suck at everything i do and i’ll just be a failure the rest of my life. im ugly, stupid and an annoying ***** who needs to die. i’ll never be the pretty one, i’ll never succeed. my mind is all fucked up with suicidal thoughts and im not the person who i was before. now i just wanna die and escape this pain. what reason do i have to still be here if no one loves me, the only thing i’ll do is cry myself to sleep, self-harm, and hate […]
Can you believe it? The only thing stopping me from suicide is the fear of the physical pain I will feel. I’m scared of jumping in front of a train, of using a knife, of jumping – all due to the unimaginable pain that I imagine will be felt.
I just want it to be painless.
I’ve already resolved to commit suicide – but I’m being held back  by the stupid fear of pain.
I have already resolved that I am not a viable member of the human race – I have failed. I am now mediocre. And this was always my worst fear – becoming mediocre and […]
i wish today was my last day that i would cry
i wish today was the last day i hurt someone really badly without trying
i wish i didn’t feel fat or ugly
i wish i didn’t feel stupid and sad
but all this wishing is getting me no where
i have tried to fix what i cant
i have tried so many times
so i am sorry to all those i have hurt i am sorry i cant stop thinking like this. i am so sorry but you’ll never understand how sorry i am
maybe if i was dead i wouldn’t hurt you i wouldn’t do anything wrong
i just wish that i […]