Tag:

worse

Random poem that came to mind…

by Bri 1/17/2015

written by Bri

Now I take a pill to help me sleep… I pray my thoughts, away; they keep me up all night, worse than the nightmares I fight I just want to rest. Please, just one night.

And as I drift, into the dark… My fingers numbing, my mind’s light just only a spark… I’ll rest easy tonight, because this kind of sleep… It makes me free.

(I’m under the effect of sleeping pills at the moment -ONLY the dosage my doctor told me to use when I feel restless- and this came to mind, sorry if it sounds stupid, I think I’m about to pass out)

1/17/2015 1 comment

Idk what to do

by darksouI 1/17/2015

written by darksouI

uhm hi everyone,im new here.so last summer i tried to kill myself with pills but i failed and ended up in hospital for 2 weeks.i was diagnosed with major depression.my whole family thinks this is some kind of joke,they think that theres no way i could be depressed bc im just a teen and its so disgustin and annoying.my parents are horrible.theyre calling me names and expect too much.i cry almost everynight because i cant get their words oyt of my head.my mom thinks “i’ve everything” but to her everything is money and material stuff.they never tried talking to me and always act like everything […]

1/17/2015 3 comments

I Don’t Know What to Say

by Nathaniel_Morisawa 1/12/2015

written by Nathaniel_Morisawa

The tears can’t stop coming out. I can’t stop hyperventilating.

She’s gone. I’m never going to see her again. And yet, she’s alive and well.

There is no worse feeling. I thought what I’d felt last winter was harsh. But that was nothing.

I’ve lost. I’ve lost so much. Someone help me. Someone please fucking help me.

1/12/2015 5 comments

Ive had suicidal thoughts since as long as i can remember

by nothereorthere 1/11/2015

written by nothereorthere

I’m 18 and for as long as I can remember I’ve been suicidal, I would run in front of cars when I was 4 because I’d heard of people getting killed by it. My parents got calls from my elementary school because I would say I wanted to more or less die. My parents just told me to not say it anymore. By the second grade I had multiple plans to kill myself. In the 3rd grade I told one of my peers about my thoughts and he encouraged me to act upon them. I had my first suicide attempt when I was ten. My […]

1/11/2015 2 comments

Urgent! Please read!

by brady_851 1/5/2015

written by brady_851

Hey, so I’m new here if you couldn’t already tell. I’m on here looking for answers of some sort… I probably will only come on here once and a while but please help me now. Where do I even start? Well I’m only 12 and even though I’m young I really am in trouble and I’m NOT going through a “phase”. I need help from someone out there who has experience (somewhat) with what I’m going through. So first off my parents are divorced and I live with my dad (I’m a girl and my mom lives only minutes away), My brother, who’s also my […]

1/5/2015 8 comments

Crippling Anxiety/paranoia

by goingnumb 1/4/2015

written by goingnumb

This past mont my anxiety and paranoia have gotten so fucking bad that at some points in my day I can barely breathe. I shake and my head goes crazy. I get so dizzy and my fiancé helps me he does but when he’s not here my anxiety gets worse.

1/4/2015 2 comments

Feeling depressed again – just wrote what was on my mind

by NotSorry 1/3/2015

written by NotSorry

It’s been awhile. Honestly I try to avoid this site whenever I start feeling better, because while this support group is really amazing and it’s the only place I can be honest and completely open up, it’s also depressing. But here I am again. I guess the thing about depression is that it gets better and it gets worse but it never really goes away.

Like most people here I have depression, but for about 4 years now I’ve been hiding it. I told my mom once and she said – ‘Do you even know what depression is?’ and then she dismissed it and never mentioned it again, now […]

1/3/2015 2 comments

??tolerance

by disappearingme97 1/3/2015

written by disappearingme97

The pain is getting worse. The pain is getting longer. The pain is getting more frequent.

Maybe I should keep quiet about it. A silent suicide.

Yeah. I won’t talk about it anymore. If I die, then so be it. It’ll be all natural, won’t it.

Stay calm. Patience. Just be patient. Just wait. Let it be natural. All in all, it’ll be a better memory for those who remember.

Be patient.

1/3/2015 1 comment

Online Buddies in Despair

by Lsari 1/2/2015

written by Lsari

That is the new slogan I have come up with. It is equally meaningful and lacking in motivation, a suitable one for SP, if I do type so myself 🙂

To everyone who feels alone and abandoned: Know this! we are online buddies in despair!

Wow…that was worse than I imagined :'(

At least we are not alone, in the physical sense at least. As a famous person once said: “Tis better to suffer together, than to die alone”.

1/2/2015 3 comments

Confused and fed up.

by MysteriousCloud 1/1/2015

written by MysteriousCloud

I’m getting worse mentally. Before I could hold it all in, now I burst into tears whenever I’m alone until I cant breathe and start shaking and feel sick. its so weird and I don’t like it. I get stressed out and scared more than I used to and its all starting to crumble and show on the outside. However I suppose on the good side I have stopped hurting myself. But I don’t know which is better to be honest, coz this shit is messing with me and I’m fed up of it, I’m fed up of being here.

1/1/2015 2 comments

People hurt.

by jasal 12/29/2014

written by jasal

They really do. They hurt so much that sometimes I really wish I could be all alone in this world. I wish I had no family or friends, that I could live entirely on my own. And sometimes I envision a future where that’s how I really live. Phone calls to my parents, occasionally, gifts mailed out during the holidays to some of my relatives, but nothing more than those few interactions. Nothing face-to-face or substantial. The only downside to this grand future is that I am inherently extroverted, and isolation feeds my depression and anxiety and ultimately makes me feel worse. I need people […]

12/29/2014 0 comment

Me.

by unbrokenangel 12/25/2014

written by unbrokenangel

So hey I’m new here so please don’t judge me with what I post.

I’ve had suicidal thoughts since sixth grade. I’m now in tenth. I’ve kept telling myself to not worry that it will get better. That’s only a lie though. It’s gotten way worse. Especially high school. This past year I’ve made mistakes and I’ve trusted the wrong people. I was bullied on Ask.fm because of it. It got so bad that I wouldn’t get out of bed. I just cried all day. Every time I get a notification from it I jump. I’m scared to death that it’s going to be hate or […]

12/25/2014 5 comments

chronic physical pain

by deadpuppy 12/24/2014

written by deadpuppy

i’ve been thru so much shit in my life i wouldn’t even know where to begin

then what happens? life throws chronic pain at me…yay! now i’m sitting here wanting to die and in agonizing pain

i’ve had this pain for 2 years now and it’s getting worse every day

the funny thing is that i was suicidal way before i got this pain…now i’m even more suicidal than i was before, which i didn’t think was possible

ughhhhhhh please just KILL ME NOW!!! i fucking HATE my life…

12/24/2014 5 comments

Possible more darkness in my tunnel. Is there even any light anymore?

by BrokenAngel8 12/15/2014

written by BrokenAngel8

2 years ago if you would of asked me I would of said something similar to that i felt like the happiest and luckiest girl in the world to be his. Now all I just feel is broken, hurt, betrayed and confused. I feel betrayed by what he said about me behind my back a few weeks ago.

I knew we had issues in our relationship I thoguht we were both strong enough to get through it but I guess I was dead wrong. Instead of confronting me about how you felt you t alked behind my back about it its bad enough that i found […]

12/15/2014 1 comment

Thoughts.

by TotalFuckup 12/13/2014

written by TotalFuckup

You know how this site was created so suicidal people can come together and help each other? Yeah, it’s not having that effect on me. It’s actually kinda making it worse. Maybe it’s just me. I don’t know. On a side note, how the hell do you delete your account??

12/13/2014 1 comment

It is inevitable.

by DancerToADiscordantSystem 12/13/2014

written by DancerToADiscordantSystem

I don’t even know anymore.I got completely hammered in hopes of…i don’t know,maybe getting my mind off of things.Not surprisingly,it feels even worse than when i’m sober.All the time it’s the same,just with varying degrees of shittiness. When you’re drunk,suffering and depression feels even more tangible than it’s usual abstract,existential nature.It’s inescapable.Thank you for existing SP.

12/13/2014 3 comments

My thoughts

by alex 12/12/2014

written by alex

Why cant i go a day without thinking of killing myself? Its like a constant struggle to continue to live in this world. Everything is just so meaningless to me now. Is there even a real point to continue living and moving forward or are we just fooling oursleves when we say “it will get better”.

When i use to try and ask for help to stop these thoughts people only made it worse by telling me there is something wrong with me and i should go to a therapist but all they would do is put me on pills. I dont wanna go on […]

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12/12/2014 10 comments

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Lost my steering wheel

by ClairDeLune 12/12/2014

written by ClairDeLune

I don’t wanna lose it again. The last weeks and months were better, but now I know I’m heading right towards the abyss and can’t seem to change the direction, no matter how much I would like to. I do stuff even though I know it’s detrimental. Like even at this moment I’m listening to music of which I know it triggers my depression. Maybe it has to do with the days getting shorter and the weather getting colder. Or maybe it’s the stress, but that’s usually worse when I have to write exams. Best I can do now is survive another 1 1/2 weeks […]

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12/12/2014 2 comments

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Burn in hell…

by Alexther 12/11/2014

written by Alexther

… Or, if you can’t afford the bus ticket to hell, just do it in your basement.

It’s so very simple. Fill the place with gas(but make sure it is sealed off from the outside if you choose this), or pour gasoline or any other highly imflamable substance all over. That’s how I plan on going down… Going down in fucking flames. The life of a damned soul I had, and the same death shall I have. I imagine everything so clearly… The flames surprisingly lighting as high as the ceiling when I drop the burning match on the floor… The extreme heat of the inferno […]

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12/11/2014 3 comments

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Life in a Cage Tailored Just for Me

by Realm of Great Darkness 12/11/2014

written by Realm of Great Darkness

My life has been hell for the longest while. I’m at a point now where I’ve lost all drive, and wish to die. My family hasn’t been there for me in years, and the job I have now is a ever ending fest of self-important douches who see the world within themselves and no-one else. Though, I suppose that’s California in a nutshell.

I’m Tessa, an introverted woman in her early thirties who has found herself living a strictly independent life since the age of fourteen, void of any friends, lovers, or anything else that might shape her life in normality. Nice to meet all of […]

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12/11/2014 5 comments

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