Im going to start from the beginning.
I never met my dad and I know little about my mothers life.
My mother got addicted to hard drugs in her early teen years and never fixed her life. She had a hard life, she got sexually abused by her dad and had also gotten raped a few times. She had me in her early twenties and when I was born I had Herion and cocaine in my blood. From the time I was born to when I was 7 years old, she had gotten in trouble with the police and also had near death experiences involving […]
Stories of Hope
Hi guys! How have you been? I have some good and then again some bad news… I have girlfriend : ) She is like all I ever wanted, and I couldn’t ask anything more when I have her by my side ♥ We have been together almost two months now, but we have secretly been in love with each other over half a year.. so we are happy that we can finaly be together now!
But there is one problem I haven’t talked with her about yet.. And it’s her ex. Her exgirlfriend, who died last year. I know that year is very very short time […]
I finally have had enough with the emotional and physical abuse with everyone in my life. It is not like I have a best friend to tell all my problems to and receive advice from so I have decided to take a step forward and see a therapist.
I am partially excited about this decision because I can finally allow myself to open up without worrying about my secrets getting out but I am also afraid to tell about my feelings and emotions because what if he/she thinks I am a freak? A nothing.
This is my first step towards freedom from the dreadful memories that bind […]
Laying in bed listening to ohio is for lovers…reliving my teenage emo days lots of love for Hawthorne heights you got me through some of the toughest times of my life…and now I find I can depend on you once more <3
I think its amazing just how naive people can be… I am starving myself to the point were I wont eat for days and when I do eat ill discreetly throw it back up… my friends and family think im just on a diet that is actually working for me little do they realise I am killing myself in the slowest way possible so nobody has to find a bloody mangled mess that would be my body if I was to take the conventional way(cutting). I know its no ones problem but my own but it just feels good to let this out because although […]
Hi, my name is Tyler… I’m about to turn 16 in July… I’m exceptionally gay… Which means that I’m gay with one person in my life who is an exception… Her name is Koral… Her and I dated for what would have been four months tomorrow… She broke up with me last Monday… My life has been hell ever since… She claims the reason for her breaking up with me, is that she used to have a feeling for me before we broke up, that she would always want to be around me physically, and she would get excited to talk to me, and be […]
I have moments when I’m sobbing on the ground, unable to think of anything besides suicide. There is something so comforting about being able to take away your own life, your own existence. I’ll lay there and cry because no one should hate themself the way I do, no one should be comforted by the thought of death. I am though, we are. That’s something no one knows about me, I’d probably be one of the last people anyone would pin the label suicidal to, I’m always smiling, laughing, and helping others. There is a reason why I haven’t followed through with my plans though, […]
Help me… i need someone.. i cant take this anymore…even here in the internet im alone.. how fucking pathetic is that… help me… be my friend…whoever you are, help me.. this is my last attempt…last.
If there’s something I could change about myself  I wish I wasn’t soo sensitive and that things wouldn’t get to me. Yesterday at school something someone said got to me and what they said wouldn’t usually bother me. The people at lunch I usually sit with(which is only 20 minutes) kicked me out of the table and said “we don’t really know you and don’t understand why you sit with us considering you’re a sophomore and we’re freshman and you have plenty of friends in school so I don’t see why you sit with us and you don’t really talk” the thing is that isn’t […]
Sometimes, when I wake up, my heart beat seems slow and soothing, and I know that day is going to suck. Nothing will go right and I will reach for my blade, again. I hate it. I hate the people who make me feel worthless because they are right. I deserve to be bullied. All the vulgar thoughts that run through my head at any given time.. I’ve thought of killing my mom. Messed up, I know.
Today has been better than yesterday was for her. No yelling, no fighting, no hurtful words were propelled at her.
Last night was rough on her. She had to meet her regulars, some nice, some not so much. There was always those men who were very aggressive and since they were paying they felt entitled to anything they wanted. The girl would stop arguing after the first hit, she would stop resisting and let herself float into subspace waiting till it was over. The girl would awaken with noticeably black bruises up and down her arms, her neck, and down her legs.
She is afraid to go home, she […]
I’m not someone who anybody would suspect to be suicidal. I’m 17. I have the top grades in my class. I’m pretty (or so people tell me). I have a great group of friends. I’m popular. I’m funny. I’m well dressed. But at the end of the day, I hate myself. I hate myself more than anyone else could possibly hate me. But I’m still here. Read this and I’ll tell you why.
As I’m typing this tears are streaming down my face. My mom just finished another round of yelling at me to kill myself and how I’m a failure who will never amount to […]
I was inspired to write my story I’ve already posted it but I was vague and didn’t really go into detail about myself. In the sixth grade I was bullied by kids in my class and didn’t have any friends at first I was fine with it but then it got to me and it made me hate who I was and feel ugly from the on I hated going to school and I would cry when I got home and used to wish that I were beautiful or interesting so people would like me but to make myself feel better I would watch anime’s […]
This is my story about how i had my heart broken a couple of times. it soon spawned a fear of abandonment in me and made me think i was never good enough. if you wish to hear how i survived my hardship then please read this.
I was born different from other kids. i chose not to give in to the social flow and i  lived how i felt. i had friends, a pretty good amount. i fell in love many times and had a few relationships. I grew up being who i felt was me. Sometime around the summer of 2012 about early June, […]
Somebody wrote to me “your great” today. I literally cried.
I made the worst mistake of my life by trying to end it. But the craziest thing happened. It became the biggest blessing as well. I grew up hearing things like, “you’re ugly,” “worthless!” “a mistake” “why didn’t you get an A?” This over time by family, peers, and our culture in general just eroded my self-confidence and by the age of 23 I was in full blown anger and depression. I was so tired of being rejected, judged, teased, bullied, etc that I couldn’t see any other solution but taking my life and so I tried. Well, God decided he had another plan and […]
early in the morning
as the sun rises
you’re wide awake
no surprises
honestly, she never sleeps
she’s up til dawn
fussing about her weight
she’s pinching her tummy
she’s making herself sick
it’s honestly cruel
what children permit
-e.m.
i met a girl
and she told me
that she thought
she did not deserve a name
so
what i did
was rename her beautiful
now that’s what she cuts
into her own skin
-e.m.
i don’t know what to think
when you said
‘don’t blink,
i’ll just be gone a minute’
you didn’t come back
you killed your own self
so you didn’t have to
wake up in the morning
-e.m.