I can’t cope with this anymore. Everythings falling apart. Nobody cares about me and the only person that does, the girl I love with all my heart doesn’t anymore either. I’m a wreck. I break down, I get so angry, I cry, I can’t sleep and it happens everyday. I want to end my life so bad. Nobody will care that I’m gone. It will end all the pain I’ve put on people and they wont have to stress about me anymore. I have a plan. I’m going to write a suicide not explaining everything, I’m going to sneak out when everyone is asleep then I’m going to end it. I searched methods but I tryed to OD and it didn’t work so I’ve been looking for a gun so I can blow my fucking brains out. But the thing is there’s something holding me back. Fear? A little bit of hope? I don’t know what to do but I guess I’ll know when it happens
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Dont do it kid. Unfortunately people dont always value us like they should. That doesn’t give us the excuse to do the same to ourselves. If i realized that at your age id be less fucked up (and i remember how much i hated hearing old people say that but i digress). I’ll care if your gone I’ll care because a good person somewhere will be gone who doesn’t need to be. Please care about yourself especially when no one else does.
You can’t pull the trigger because deep down you know this isn’t the solution. I’ve said similar things like no one cares about me or would care if I died. In moments of depression those things seem true but in reality we know at least some people care about us and would be devastated if we died. What’s even more important is how you feel. You should want to live for you and an opportunity to make your life better. Maybe you don’t have a lot of friends or a girlfriend now but if you hang in there you never know. You could meet new people and that could all change…. But if you kill yourself you’re not even giving yourself a chance. You deserve another chance at life. It’s not going to be easy as you recover but when you finally do it will certainly be worth it.
I read your post and a lot of it was very familiar. Let me share my experience with you. I, too, had a woman that loved me. Now she’s abandoned me and erased me. And so have her three kids, who I love like my own. I have nothing to live for anymore.
I tried the gun method. Won’t work for me. I have concluded that my fear of botching it is too great, and won’t allow me to do it. I have been screwing up everything my entire life, how can I trust myself to carry this out correctly?
I am ready to die, but I guess I’m not ready to survive and be disfigured, brain damaged and paralyzed. So guns are out for me.
ODing on pills is the least probable method to actually kill you. I wrote a detailed comment about it last night. Try and find it if you can. It might help prepare you for what comes next if you fail. Not pretty.
If you have something in your life that can keep you going, grab it with both hands and use it for all it’s worth. If there is hope for your situation to improve, then do everything in your power to make it happen.
If you’re truly done, then all I can wish for you is success.
I will care