Family & Friends Effects

The effects of suicide on family and friends.

4

How do you feel good when everything is screwed up?

  April 20th, 2009 by britt_018

I hate school like i can honestly say i do except for my math teacher she is amazing. I havent been going and my mom gets pissed at me for not going but she doesnt understand that i feel like one of the “out crowd” kids cause i am over weight and ive never actually got called fat well i have but its like in one of those “funny” ways well they think its funny and i just put a smile on my face and act like its nothing but it hurts really bad. Ive told my mom but she thinks its all bull [...]
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3

Gone

  April 17th, 2009 by mickey-12-2015

I am only 12. at age 12 my brothers freind at age 18 tryed to rape me. His name is Bidy and right know i am scared to even have a boyfreind. many times i have held a razor blade to my wrist. two cuts and it would all be over. Their is a s on my leg that will be there for forever. The S stands for my best freind first letter in her name Sammy. oh god i love that girl she is like my sister. I have started middle school, and am in track. i cut and cut and cut but it [...]
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3

ultimate death

  April 16th, 2009 by taylor_price

i hate life..everything is going wrong. i really want to die. i have lost everyone important to me..school sucks..home life..it isn’t even home. i wish i could just slit my rises. but my girlfriend spitt in my left eye.it burned. i mad sum, bade choses.my mother calls me bad names.I hear my step dad talk about me behind my back to my own mom.My ex gurlfrend used me for sex.she told me she loved me only for my booty.she called me pathetic and that if i wanted to kill myself i should go ahead and get it over with.that she never wanted to see my jew [...]
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2

no promises

  April 12th, 2009 by slumber33

im having a really hard time at school and at home at school i’m getting seriously bullied and i’v been punched twice for nothing at all and i keep getting threatened and i’m just so scared. at home i’m geting underestimated everone thinks i’m so stupid, that i’m no right in the head and to be honest right now i dont think i am. one night i sat with my legs dangling out my window thinking should i jump head first or not but then i thought of my mum and all my family and i didnt want them to go through pain of greef, [...]
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1

Upside Down Life with a Touch of Hope

  April 12th, 2009 by upsidedownlife

We always believe it we have it so bad. If we didn’t, none of us would be here writing our stories that are filled with anger and pain. I suppose I am bitter. Bitter with everyone I trusted that I know can not stand but have no escape from.

I would like to believe I am a good person who is a useful community member. As it stands I find this very hard to believe. And like everyone else …. I don’t know why. I can not understand my thought process let alone why everything is upside down and twisted around in my life.

At 11 years [...]
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1

inpending doom

  April 7th, 2009 by hopeless72

Last week my husband came to see me so that we could talk. Well he came back the next day and then stayed the nite on friday nite. He had told me we were sole mates and would be together for the rest of our lives. I had to work on saturday so he went to help his mother with yard work. He sent me a text message staing he would be to my house after i got off work at 6. He then sent another text message about two hours later that asked me if i would be upset if he didnt come over [...]
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2

everything went wrong

  April 7th, 2009 by catherine

I am 30 now. I was thinking a lot about suicide since I was a teenager, but i never tried it, all I did was cutting myself.

I always thought this sadness and lonelyness inside me would go away, but it just didn’t.

When i was 21 i was in therapy for a while and I stopped cutting myself after that, moved abroad and started school. But the sadness always stayed with me.

I graduated from school, I am an artist and in school i was really good, but now it’s of course very difficult. That’s probably how it is for everybody, but i don’t have the strength [...]
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2

getting closer to suicide

  March 30th, 2009 by homeoffice

I’ve read a couple of posts and I think its great that people have a chance to express themselves and get others to help. I’ve tried to fill myself 4 or 5 times now and I havent been able to do it. I know that most people have issues and that they find it difficult to talk to someone or maybe feel that there is no way out.

I never believed in suicide and I always thought that anyone that tired to kill themselves was selfish and that they didn’t think of the people around them that could help. At the very worst I thought you [...]
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12

A DECONSTRUCTED LIFE

  March 28th, 2009 by deliriousgirl

Yesterday was my brother’s birthday.

My brother, who would have been 47 years old, committed suicide by hanging himself from his attic trapdoor in the hallway of his house on December 15th, 2008.  He left no note, no explanation, no message of any kind.  Since his death I’ve had the near-obsession of recreating his life from the scraps that were left.  An email here and there (I was able to hack into his computers), a receipt from Home Depot (for rope, plastic zip ties, and a metal pole) that was dated four weeks prior, bills and business files, phone calls and messages on his cellphone, the [...]
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5

I just dont know…

  March 28th, 2009 by twoblueshinigami

im a 15 year old girl, who, for as far as i can remember, never had a bondage with her father, or anyone else. everybody that knew me as a kid would tell you the same. that when my father (or anyone) would walk into the room id go ‘uh uh uh uh’ (with in dutch is something like, oh no no no no) to shoo them out of the room. the only person in my life i could tell anything to is my mom. even tho i dont even tell her everything, too.  for example, i never told her i made a false account [...]
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3

The Perfect Family Gone Horribly Wrong

  March 23rd, 2009 by kickballplayer4life

It all started on a friday afternoon. My mom had just picked me up from school and we were on our way to pick up my older siblings from their schools. Then i had noticed my mom was acting very peculiar. So i asked if everything was ok, and she replied no with a fake smile. i knew something was wrong but i just didnt know what. Once we picked up my older siblings i got ready for a girl scout troop meeting. My mom drove me to it and as soon as she had arrived back at my fathers house she told my [...]
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2

so confused

  March 21st, 2009 by soconfused

I dont know what im going to do without her. She was my bestfriend at least i thought. I wasted 3 years of my life in some friendship. You might say friendships come and go.. but ill tell you why this one was diffrent. We were more then friends at one point. She started it and i went along with it just so happy that someone loved me. One night when she stayed the night she put her arm around me and that was it. Its as much as my fault as it is hers i didnt stop anything. Nothing serious ever happened just cuddling [...]
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3

numb

  March 18th, 2009 by greatwar

as a child beaten and unloved, told to leave and never to return.

alone and desperate for love, let in love, well what i thought was love, to be let down and left with two wonderfull children, but still wanted to be loved and wanted to be wanted, let love in again, to be beaten and abused, no one to help, let down by everyone,  12 years long years, trying to hide it form my (now three) children, lost in the divorce, hunted out of my home, relocated, in poverty, no fridge, cooker, carpets, and baillifs around tomorow to take what i have left.

iam numb, i [...]
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8

Why suicide is a lousy idea (most of the time)!

  March 14th, 2009 by drukdeur

Before I get flamed as one of those “goody two shoes”, this is not going to be a post about why suicide is morally wrong, or trying to convert you to any religion.  I am an agnostic, and I really don’t believe in forcing my morality on anyone.

I think suicide is justified in some cases: if I were to have a terminal illness, and I would be enduring a lot of pain until I die, I would consider an assisted suicide as an option.  However, when it comes to emotional pain, I think suicide is not a great option, and here’s why:

(1) We are animals, [...]
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1

Idealization

  March 14th, 2009 by z

How I idealize: a certain member here sums it up perfectly.  So I sat down and idealized more.  And watched a very good film on the subject.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0477139/

Film teaser: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gn7GVNskKU8

It is about us.  It is a beautiful film that is as funny as it made me cry.  I don’t want to spoil it for anyone, you should just watch it.

This is all I do now, idealize my own death and who I will meet afterwards.  There is a romance to it.  And it’s not to get back at anyone, I just want to reach outward and upward.

My life (oh boy, the “my life story” [...]
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10

I feel so helpless.

  March 12th, 2009 by idontknwowhattodo

I dont know what to do. I am 13 years old and I dont know if I can take it anymore. My parents are divorced, my dad has anger issues and yells a lot. I feel like I have to protect my step brother and step sister because my step mom doesn’t do anything. My step mom gets stressed and takes her anger out on me. My mom is also stressed and takes her anger out on me. At school I try to be friends with everyone but everyone just ignores me and whispers behind my back about how I smell and how ugly I [...]
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8

This is going to be long.. Sorry people

  March 12th, 2009 by devils advocate

Hi my name is Madelaine and I am 19 years old. Iv been suicidal since I was about 13 years old and it just progressed from there. For 10 years I was sexually assaulted so as I started going from a little girl to a teenager my mind just soared with anger. I was bullied all through primary school and High school. I was the geek, the nerd, the one noone liked because to them I was ugly. It just kinda stuck so I think I am ugly…

My mother never accepted me. I was never good enough for her. So i just wanted to die [...]
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3

My story-ish

  February 17th, 2009 by Stonecolddeadinside

I know that people always say, “Oh it’ll be okay” and “Oh I’m so sorry”. They say all these things that just don’t help. But when you need it the most, there’s always one person, who’ll actually say something that helps.

I’ve lost a lot of things, Family, friends, the love of my life, and even the will to live. It hurts when someone you love lies to you, or your family disowns you.

A few months ago, I got in trouble with the law for my brother’s Marijuana in my car. I made the illogical decision to let him smoke in my car before [...]
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4

Spiralling downward. I think I’m loosing all I have left.

  February 10th, 2009 by Kuddles

"Is a hug and three short words, really too much? Or am I loosing him, all I have left? After loosing my mother, my father, and being separated from my sister am I loosing him too? I just don't think I can take it."
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0

THE HURT IS TOO MUCH

  February 9th, 2009 by PATRICIA MARSHALL

REJECTION FROM YOUR LEGAL FAMILY IS HURTFUL. REJECTION FROM YOUR ADOPTIVE FAMILY IS EVEN WORSE. REJECTION FROM YOUR CHILDREN IS THE MOST HURTFUL THING IN THE WORLD. REJECTION FOR MONEY AND REJECTION BECAUSE OF BEING THREATENED AND BECAUSE ITS TOUGH LOVE.
TOUGH LOVE CAUSES MORE HURT AND PAIN AND I HAVE BEEN TOUGH LOVED TO DEATH. THAT MESS WENT OUT IN THE 70’S WHEN A MASS SUICIDE WAS DISCOVERED AT A TOUGH LOVE COMMUNE RAN BY SUSAN PALMONDO. SHE SELLS INSURANCE TO YOUR FAMILY. SHE CONVINCED PEOPLE THAT THEIR FAMILIES DID NOT LOVE THEM DIDN’T WANT THEM AND THIS IS WHAT SHE AND HER FAMILY [...]
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