Category:

Stories of Loss

For those who have passed on.

first denial, the realization, the total chaos

by Knightofdoom 12/18/2015

written by Knightofdoom

Alot of changes have been happening, and I just can’t adjust everything all together is tearing me up inside, my home broken and the one person I depended on is gone, even worse she can’t stand me and is so rude, the suicidal thoughts have set in and there not giving up, that physically I’m never gonna get better, or I’ll be managing this my whole life,I’m never gonna see my cats again, the only thing that held me from becoming a complete utter mess, I was holding it together for like a week and then I talked about it and uncaged the dark beast […]

12/18/2015 6 comments

It’s gone wrong

by YouAreStrong 12/16/2015

written by YouAreStrong

I don’t know what I’m looking for from this, a place to get everything off my chest to hopefully clear my mind. This is going to be a long post.

I’m 17, male, currently attending a school that specialises in Mathematics, I’m studying Mathematics, Further Mathematics, Physics and Computer Science for my A levels. I have links to a cyber security firm who will give me a scholarship and put me through a computer science degree should I choose to go to university. I also have a huge interest in nuclear energy and want to see if I can get a job in that field. My […]

12/16/2015 9 comments

My story: A missing puzzle piece.

by cland32 12/15/2015

written by cland32

Everybody has their own life, their own background, their own story. A little piece to my big puzzle of life was reshaped last year, January 7, 2015, at 2:47 when I was in the shower, listening to “What hurts the most” by Rascal Flatts, my song stopped. Though my phone had just died, but it did not. I was getting texts, and phone calls. Right when I step out of the shower I look down, and I had multiple missed calls from Jaydan. I call back, not thinking it would be any bad news, just thinking she wanted to hang out, and the words came […]

12/15/2015 6 comments

Uniquely Tormented

by torment 12/13/2015

written by torment

I can’t exactly say why I even write this, I guess I want to share my story to some extent to perhaps serve someone, in some way, sometime.

Tonight will be my seventh attempt in two weeks. My ninth total for the year. It’s not that I backed out of prior attempts, they had just not worked for the most uncanny reasons. I’ve learnt my body is extraordinary strong and resilient. I am a professional fitness person which I’m sure influences this but nonetheless tonight will be it.

I have no desire to self harm, I actually want the exact opposite the cessation of pain. My life […]

12/13/2015 6 comments

Little To No Hope Now

by GerbzBaby 12/10/2015

written by GerbzBaby

I had a very stressed week this week. With everything going on its made me feel more depressed than ever. I was hoping today would be different. My friend and I kind of planned on meeting up after work a few hours ago, but after I got a message saying he couldn’t stay. He had left for his other friends. My heart literally shattered when I read the message (and what made it worse is my feelings I have for him..). I could not believe it. I thought hanging out with him would raise my spirits, make me feel so much better. But no. He […]

12/10/2015 1 comment

.awkward

by hydrastrikes 12/10/2015

written by hydrastrikes

I have a huge crush on one guy from school for, like, forever now.. New country and new school was a rough start for me, but when I saw him for the first time, everything slowed down, my heart stopped and my brain freeze. His eyes are pale gray and when he looks at me I feel as if he is burning through my soul right out. It hurts my bones to see him, for a moment each time I see him I get a strange stabbing sensation all over my body. I am a pain addict in general, I don’t like self harm, but […]

12/10/2015 0 comment

stupid…

by Nowhere88 12/8/2015

written by Nowhere88

I’m 30 now and still can’t Forget my father spanking me, pointing the gun to my mom’s head. My older brother and sister hitting me and hurting me, and other kids making fun of me at school. They hurt me so many times and then they ran away soon and I had to grow up as an only son. I cannot forget that I could not sleep quietly because he threatened so many times of starting a fire on our house and on me and my mom in the Middle of the night and Kill us both and himself right after. I can’t just erase […]

12/8/2015 6 comments

Some people die at 25 and aren’t buried until 75

by Allitends 12/5/2015

written by Allitends

Hi there. I just want to share my story. I’m kind new around, i’m from Portugal.

Well all my life i have been very negative, in my concept, i call it, realistic. Why do people think positive? do they want to get hitted hard in face when things fall? Anways its just my thing i guess, and im very hard person to motivate, i watch everyone, and they all got a dream, they want to be someone, and have some carrer. The thing is that i never dreamed or wanted to be something, all i asked at my teenager age was someone to connect, guess what, i […]

12/5/2015 21 comments

Go to bed wanting to die, wake up wanting to die

by rayonhousefly 12/4/2015

written by rayonhousefly

That’s how it goes. I’m not looking for sympathy or empathy or anything really, just felt like finally posting something after being registered for such a long while and not doing anything with it.

My stories the same as most, severe depression since I was young, when my mom got injured at work and I basically lost her, at least in my mind how it felt. She was a single mom so with no one else there to help us, it was up to me to take care of everything. That wasn’t so bad really, I liked the responsibility.

Fast forward a few years, I’m 12 or […]

12/4/2015 3 comments

It’s funny how long the night lasts

by foreveristhenight 12/4/2015

written by foreveristhenight

And my thoughts spiral, how funny it is that the empath is the one that needs help themselves.

It’s been a while since she died. She was my world and I was hers. The main thing I remember was the sunshine always shone from and through her, she was always the nicest and most giving, generous person.

Should I have wondered why?

Apparently she was planning her death since before she met me. I never saw any of it, all I saw was her mask and it never slipped. I think I gave her hope, until one night, after her parents had physically abused her.

I received a phone […]

12/4/2015 3 comments

M’s May

by losthinata23 12/2/2015

written by losthinata23

Its 2015 Before May my cousin still keeps on doing the same dame things to me I wish he would stop which he did around my he came back but with a girl good god yes his stop I thought. But no when his girl wasnt around he would still do the sexual things but this time he whispered in my ear while he forced me to have sex with him and took my v card but he told me “to bad I stool your v card now no guy would want to go out with you or marry you ” when he […]

12/2/2015 10 comments

scared to end my life

by n40m 11/30/2015

written by n40m

11/30/2015 11 comments

My head is like phone static

by ShortOne 11/29/2015

written by ShortOne

recently, i’ve discovered yet another sickening dilemma caught up inside me. i’m already filled with them you see, but the space inside of me can always grow to accommodate more internal turmoil it seems. especially now that the only person i ever trusted completely is gone, and i’ve damaged all the meaningful relationships with those around me, and my head keeps spinning telling me i can never be happy, and i believe that my head is right.

due to my past and the likely hood of my future based on my functioning as a human being. you see, i am weak. all i’ve ever contributed in […]

11/29/2015 9 comments

At a Loss For Words…

by Sportybromo22 11/28/2015

written by Sportybromo22

Words can never fully describe how emotionally bent I am. Seriously. Im at my wits end. My parents disapproval of me being gay, my physical ailment. My constant mental battle of staying alive is no longer pulling in my favor. Its stressful, I feel weak. Unworthy. Drained. I give up…

11/28/2015 3 comments

Religious rehab

by Salesman 11/23/2015

written by Salesman

I have been putting a lot of thought into religion lately and I get it. Religion is important in a lot of peoples lives and they get angry when you want to freely discuss god instead of blindly follow. A good friend of mine killed herself a few years back. We were part of the Jehovah’s witness cult and she had voices in her head telling her to hurt herself. She went to the elders of the church (because that’s what you would do) and they told her she needed to pray more. Not one of those motherfuckers though maybe she should go to see […]

11/23/2015 7 comments

Well, hello.

by SeekerP 11/20/2015

written by SeekerP

24 years old female. My life has two parts: Happy with obstacles for 14 years and been miserable for the other ten years.

Before you read, please don’t forget that my experiences that I’m going to write, happened when I was a child and in my teens. So evaluate them according to my age that time.

Happy with obstacles happenings:
* At the age 4, my parents divorced. I’m with my mom since then..
* My father was away in another city but we adored each other so much and he was proud with all the qualities I have. We spent the summer holiday and semesters together. […]

11/20/2015 7 comments

It seems longer …

by Dawg 11/19/2015

written by Dawg

For those of you who don’t know me – Hi, I’m dawg. As I do from time to time I pop in and out of the SP world – for no particular reason other than I try to keep up with the many many great people who I’ve met with here in the SP world … again, for those of you who don’t know me, I’m old … much older than most who participate here – I point this out because I have a hard time remembering all the names, so I’m not going to list the multitude of names I’ve met here – but […]

11/19/2015 13 comments

Dreams better than reality? Why Dream is better than reality? Why is Dreams better than reality?

by niki 11/19/2015

written by niki

Why Dreams is better than reality?
Why is Dream better than reality?
Why is dreams better than reality? Why dream is better than reality?

What puzzles me the most is human’s mind / human’s brains and imagination better than reality / human’s fantasy is better than reality.

for example:
just look at the movies, novels, comics, games, books, , animations (anime / manga), science fiction (sci-fi / sci fi), fantasy , like Star Wars, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Narnia, Final Fantasy, Kingdom Hearts, Swords Art Online, MMORPG , Interstellar , The Matrix , Avengers , X-Men , etc etc, they are much more interesting, full […]

11/19/2015 1 comment

I just don’t know anymore

by deep002 11/12/2015

written by deep002

I don’t know what the hell I’m doing anymore. Almost feels like I am just wasting life away. I have no idea what I want to do in life. I thought I had it figured out in high school, but when I realized I wasn’t able to afford university, I felt depressed. The reason I got good grades in school was to get into university; now I had to settle with community college. And if I was going to community college, what was the point of getting good grades? What’s the point of straight A’s if you go to community college? They don’t care. When […]

11/12/2015 2 comments

Being Alive Is Not Enough

by Iknowsanta30 11/11/2015

written by Iknowsanta30

Hi, I am a first time poster here however I have been reading a lot of the various pieces that have been put up and thought I would tell my story in the hope that it will help someone else or maybe even me, so here goes.

I am 30 years old, male, live in Scotland. I have a good job, own my flat and a car. Basically have all the materialistic things that matter to many people. I have fantastic friends and family – there are seven billion people in the world and I honestly feel like I couldn’t hand pick better people to have […]

11/11/2015 7 comments

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