Category:

Stories of Loss

For those who have passed on.

Being Alive Is Not Enough

by Iknowsanta30 11/11/2015

written by Iknowsanta30

Hi, I am a first time poster here however I have been reading a lot of the various pieces that have been put up and thought I would tell my story in the hope that it will help someone else or maybe even me, so here goes.

I am 30 years old, male, live in Scotland. I have a good job, own my flat and a car. Basically have all the materialistic things that matter to many people. I have fantastic friends and family – there are seven billion people in the world and I honestly feel like I couldn’t hand pick better people to have […]

11/11/2015 7 comments

Day 1- Depression

by ClaudiaValencia 11/9/2015

written by ClaudiaValencia

I think I will start posting everyday that my depression acts up.

Ive been depressed since I was 3 years old on and off. It’s really quite odd though to think of a depressed three year old. Lately I’ve been getting worse though. I thought I had been cured of my depression for a while because I hadn’t felt it there. I think the reason I’m feeling depressed is because I stopped taking my antidepressants for a few days…. I know, not a smart choice.

Im gonna see my therapist at one o’clock today.

I haven’t seriously thought of suicide. I’ve cut myself quite badly though. The wounds […]

11/9/2015 2 comments

Beauty of neutrality

by Littlebitlost 11/2/2015

written by Littlebitlost

Well, hello everyone..

I haven’t written on a site like this before but tonight I needed to tell someone, anyone before I explode. Just as an over view I’m an 18 year old in the grey as hell country of England on the south coast somewhere..

I have always been treated for one kind of mental health issue or another. My mom had me put through Dragonflies which is a kind of bereavement councillor when I was in year six so around 10 / 11 years old, I think she was hoping I was just sad when my grandad passed. Don’t get me wrong I was but […]

11/2/2015 5 comments

Hopefully My Last Days

by Umut 11/2/2015

written by Umut

It’s a new week and nothing has changed. Living 20 years or 80 years doesn’t matter, we’ll all die. I love ancient greek and rome. They are highest point humanity has reached. But we live in honorless age. This age full of miserable people who live for miserable things. We are a little dot in Universe but they put meaning to life when there is no meaning at all. I don’t wanna live for nothing.

Soon as i finish my last book, i will lay on train tracks. It is one of the least painful way. I hope my existence will end and i don’t ever […]

11/2/2015 2 comments

It’s for the best I promise you

by wannabedeadcat05 11/1/2015

written by wannabedeadcat05

I have made a decision, one that I hope I won’t be hated for because ill be doing that already. I’m going to give my daughter up for adoption, I’m going to be homeless soon, I still can’t get government assistance much less housing (it’s very hard to come by) and the cold weather is getting worse. My daughter can’t live like this anymore, my job as a cashier barely does anything for us I wish I could work full time but it’s only me who takes care of my baby. Her father loves her but is a deadbeat. He says he’s focusing more on […]

11/1/2015 4 comments

I Want Them To Come Back

by GerbzBaby 10/31/2015

written by GerbzBaby

I miss all of the old friends I have lost. They left me and I left them. I miss all the good memories I had with each of them. Now I’m stuck at home alone on Halloween with no energy and no friends who want to invite me to hang out with them, I have a feeling this years holidays are going to suck.

10/31/2015 4 comments

The most miserable day of the year

by disgusting 10/31/2015

written by disgusting

Halloween used to be my favorite day of the year and the fall used to be my favorite time of year but it’s managed to be miserable every year since 2011 when my first cat was sick and dying.

But right now I feel the most horrible. I feel sick to my stomach out of pure misery, sadness, depression and loneliness. I can’t say I feel like no one gives a fuck about me because I know that no one gives a fuck about me. I’m going to end up alone and homeless just like the universe and God intended from my very conception.

I’m all alone […]

10/31/2015 5 comments

I can’t kill myself

by Umut 10/29/2015

written by Umut

I’m from Turkey, shithole country. Everyday news full of rape, theft, explosions, etc… I’m so tired of being part of this bullshit. This country full of crazy religious muslims who will try to kill or beat you if you’re not one of them. I’m not stupid, i’m reading book all day but what for? Waiting someone to kill me or going jail for my thoughts? 21. century is just rubbish. I don’t wanna be part of this life but i can’t kill myself. Because i feel like i haven’t completed somethings or just i’m animal who follow his instincts. I sold my xbox and guitar […]

10/29/2015 14 comments

Poem for today

by kzn123 10/28/2015

written by kzn123

I’m new to here, so hello… I’ve been feeling down for a while now and alots been going on… I’m sure a lot of you can relate to this poem …

You make me feel so worthless
So depressed and so alone
You make me feel like crying
And cutting deep into the bone

You look at me in solitude
With your evil looking glare
Make me feel so worthless
Like I’m living in despair

I want you to understand
To have some gratitude in there
To feel the emptiness I feel
And the loneliness in the bed we share

Why am I here
What have I done
Will […]

10/28/2015 9 comments

Illness of Stress and Parents. Help Would Be Greatly Appricated

by GerbzBaby 10/21/2015

written by GerbzBaby

Stress has been making me feel ill lately. My chest feels tight, I’m more tiered than usual, my eating habits have declined, I’m more confined in my room, and my temper had been flaring on and off. The only things I can think about to get away from this is running away, or just ending it. But those are things I don’t want to do. But this “family vacation” we are taking in December is making me stressed to the point of feeling sick. Why you ask? Here is why-

One: The Plane Ride

Two: The Other Family

The other family is an ‘old family friend’ of ours. […]

10/21/2015 2 comments

Don’t know what to do anymore.

by nowheretoturn 10/21/2015

written by nowheretoturn

I don’t have anything. I am failing out of college, I am unhappy with my job, I am out of money, I don’t have very many friends, the love of my life/best friend just ruthlessly walked out of my life. I guess that is my biggest issue. I had been in serious relationships in the past, but nothing quite as emotionally invigorating at this one. We met about a year ago, last October, both working at a local grocery store to put ourselves through college. Around the time of the new year, it was evident that a connection was forming. We would grab dinner several […]

10/21/2015 2 comments

Depressed

by Navartiti 10/21/2015

written by Navartiti

I am so depressed. I don’t know what to do, I don’t want my sister to die, she has terminal cancer. and she can’t be treated where I live ( Jordan ) And I dont have the money to send her outside for treatment. I tried asking people, the government, i made a campaign to raise money I tried everything nobody want’s to help me, I am so depressed I can’t even go to work. I live in the UAE and work here, what kills me is that I am not there with her and she is in so much pain. she is so depressed […]

10/21/2015 9 comments

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by PandaMonkey0207 10/19/2015

written by PandaMonkey0207

All I ever wanted was to die. Those sleepless night I cried. As I watched my blood run down my wrist. He was the only one who made me happy. I pushed him away because of the pain. Now I’m watching form afar. Another girl in his arms. He smiles as he looks at her and I’m wishing it was me. My heart shattered. I’m all alone. I cut to stop the pain. I do it because I don’t want to feel. He always had my heart. I tried to love another but all I could do was think of him. My lover. The man […]

10/19/2015 1 comment

Easy way out

by Navartiti 10/19/2015

written by Navartiti

I want to die. I just dont know how ! I cant live anymore, my father passed away and now my only sister is dying of cancer I have no family left. How can I possibly end my life in the easier most painless way possible ?

10/19/2015 9 comments

Living Hell

by Plo 10/19/2015

written by Plo

Over the last few years,I am becoming more and more bored and selective with people.I feel that the majority is of them is bunch of shallow,hollow and uninteresting individuals,most of the times corrupt and totally naive,not caring about anything else than money,possessions etc.My standards regarding the ”quality” of someone are extremely strict,and regarding relations,it’s even worse.All I wanted was to find a person that will be truly unique and twisted.A person that would make up for the emptiness of the world.A person,that I would love with all my might and sacrifice everything for.I wish I had never met her,for the person I described I actually […]

10/19/2015 0 comment

Why are we alive?

by A Fairy from the Past 10/18/2015

written by A Fairy from the Past

We wake up each morning- alive. We live, struggle, suffer, fall in love (if we’re lucky), have a bit of fun, suffer a bit more and then die. What’s the point of it all? What’s the point of going through all of this, actually putting in the effort to do all of this when in the end you will die? Why not just kill yourself now? Yes, life might actually get better, but what difference does it make when in the end everything will be taken away from you ? And what happens if life happens to get worse? You stay alive and suffer even […]

10/18/2015 6 comments

Love

by secretz180 10/17/2015

written by secretz180

Ever since middle school I’ve always wanted a bf. Almost every night I would cry because I thought no one would ever love me. When I was 18, my best friend introduce me to a guy. We started emailing each other a lot. I get really bad anxiety but that one day I decided to meet him. He picked me up, all he wanted was sex. He kept pressuring me to do it so I felt like I had to. So I lost my virginity to him. He totally left me after that. I was heart broken and sad again. I met this guy on […]

10/17/2015 10 comments

Thoughts of Her

by alonelybird 10/7/2015

written by alonelybird

To think that she would like me. Who would? Or could? I can’t and won’t.
I was almost convinced she did.
I tried to get to know her, slowly it was working, she appeared to be reciprocating; smiling, laughing etcetera. After a while we got to texting. It was nice for a few messages but then she told me she had to call her boyfriend.
Ripped.
Ripped my heart out, though it’s not her fault and I don’t blame her. I just thought we had stuff in common and we’d get along.
Every one said we’d be good together.
I guess she’ll haunt my dreams […]

10/7/2015 2 comments

Isn’t it crazy…

by infinitely.spinning 9/30/2015

written by infinitely.spinning

…how one person can affect your life so much. I pride myself in being a strong person. I always have been. No one’s words have ever hurt me. Except… for one person. He broke my heart, left me with nothing. Called me names. Said I wasted months of his life. I found that he was the one person whom I can’t fight. He’s also the one person that can make me hurt like no one else can. He’s also the only person that can make me feel weak. It’s not healthy to have him in my life. That much I’ve figured out. But I’ve also […]

9/30/2015 14 comments

How to cope…..?

by EvilOni22 9/28/2015

written by EvilOni22

Ok, so suicidal thoughts linger. Will they ever totally dissipate? Perhaps or perhaps not. I don’t really know. If I had to say, I would lean towards they will lighten but never just go away. Once you learn know or relaize something, it’s not like you can just purposely unknow or unrealize it. The partial truth behind ingnore is bliss. So with acceptance of the fact I may never be able to fully revert from suicidal thoughts and desires leads me to the question of what can I do to cope with them? My mind running on the topic of ways to kill myself and […]

9/28/2015 3 comments

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