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2

CloudNine

May 24th, 2009by overstayed

I found this site the other day in just general misery… . It was weirdly comforting to have a read and a rant and see other people really  feel just as crap as I do. Well  since then I reckon i been on cloud nine. Like I have been able to work 2 full days  without disapearing through the day, fixed broken stuff I have had about, cleaned stuff . May  have forgotten to sleep a bit. But have felt like awesome like wow great like. In my awesomeness i fell off cloud nine hit the deck  hard like cried all day  been  abundle of …

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3

Unloveable

May 23rd, 2009by cc66224

The word for today is ….unloveable.

Everyday I feel so stupid and ugly. I remember in the 7th grade I was suicidal. I didnt go through with it because I thought I had great things ahead of me like being an adult away from my father, having kids. etc.

Now that I’m an adult with kids, suicide is not an option. I wish so much I would have done it then. Things would have been so much better.

I’m a single mom of 3. The only back-up I’ve had is my sister Marilyn. She said our relationship was sacred and she would always be there.

A few weeks ago …

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5

Worst years of my life

May 23rd, 2009by afewyearsback

As my username suggests, this story is from a few years back, but I think that it’s worth sharing. And yes, this is lengthy, but I’m very sure that it’s worth the read.

This was probably the worst I had felt in weeks, life just wasn’t working out for me. I was stressed under mountains of homework, stuck singing in a choir that I hated that controlled my life and I had no social life. I didn’t know how to deal or cope with stress at all. A week prior to that day, I kept writing in this one notebook:

“Tell somebody, tell somebody”

It was the last …

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10

Accident

May 22nd, 2009by BehindTheMask

See, this is the thing. It has to look like an accident. I don’t want anyone to feel guilty. And I don’t want there to be any mess for anyone to have to deal with. I don’t want my daughter to bear the stigma of having a mother who killed herself. I feel like I’ve fought my whole life to get through this. I have tried everything – psychotherapy – psychopharmacology – electroconvulsive shock treatments. But here I am again. And now I think the only way that any of this makes sense is that somehow I must deserve this. Some kind of Karma. Maybe …

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2

not so clever here

May 22nd, 2009by smthincleverhere

Since I was about 10 year old I have had suicidal thoughts. Up until about 15 minutes ago I was about to down a bottle of Advil pm and end it all.

This isn’t my first attempt at finding an answer or a cure to these feelings and thoughts on the internet. I’ve searched and read all the pleas and recovery stories. The thing is, I could never do it myself, at least I haven’t been able to. I get to the point where the pills or blade is in my hand and I can’t seem to finish. Some might say that is a good thing. …

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0

IF YOU NEED ME

May 22nd, 2009by imTHEhelp

I am always here. Please talk to me if you need to. I have several ways you can reach me.

www.myspace.com/thisisforyoufnd or www.myspace.com/likes_peanuts or ambrkilla@aol.com or cena.amber@yahoo.com  feel free to message me when ever needed. i get on reguraly.

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4

untitled

May 22nd, 2009by lostforeveruntillidie

just got out of the hospital with suicide tempations. why am i still here?? comment me if i could talk to you…

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6

I need help

May 22nd, 2009by stuart

So here’s my story.  Since I was 23, I’ve had kidney failure.  I was on dialysis for four years then my cousin gave me a kidney.  During that time I met my wife, the love i thought I would never find.  After six years of marriage our relationship started fizzling out a little.  I found an old friend online one day and we started hangin out again.  Then I brought him over to meed my wife a couple of times.  During one of these times, we all got drunk and my wife and my friend apparently kissed.  One thing led to another and she cheated …

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3

world

May 21st, 2009by helper

It’s me against the world, not that i am fighting the world and everyone in it, but its me against the myself. that is the hardest part.

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0

Broken

May 21st, 2009by Crimson

So my younger brother who i was very close to passed away in 2008 from an accidental overdose, i never had the chance to deal with his death because everyone told me i need to be strong for my mom. Since then i closed myself off from people only showing them what they wanted to see not what i was really feeling.

I met a guy shortly after and we had an instant connection and before a month we were living to gether. His the only person who’d seen me cry, after 3 weeks he packed his stuff while i was at work and moved back to his home town without …

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2

i am sick of this

May 20th, 2009by helper

i keep getting medical issues, and in highschool its just tough to deal with. And beyond that i just got diagnosed with bipolar, and i am just tired, but i know in a few hours i will be happy, and fine. I am so happy and then i get so sad, i just don’t know whether living is worth it… i know you are going to say well you’ll be happy, but then i know i will just fall again. And meds don’t work, they make it worse, and counsling does shit… God doesn’t do much either…. so i just am lost and feel done. …

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3

Untitled

May 20th, 2009by painterofmusic

So, what happened… Thursday night, I downed a bottle of medicine, because someone three fries short of a happy meal wrote on a website that “liquid is absorbed faster than pills.” So I thought… I die faster, and I fall asleep before I suffer. So much for that idea…

Obviously, my plan didn’t work. I didn’t have to go to the hospital or anything, though. I downed it, and my heart was pounding, to the point that I just knew I was going to die. So I laid down in bed, pulled the covers over my head, turned on Relient K, and tried to go to …

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1

Dans Rant

May 20th, 2009by overstayed

If you saw me , met me, got to know me,  the last impression you would get from me would be of suicidal  tendacies and an evergrowing dependency on otc drugs for helping me sleep or feel good through through the day.  Basically I am well mannerred well behaived outwoodly happy like socialble enough  to make you believe  im  basically  — ok..     However,  I dont remember  the last time I was happy. Infact I dont remember even  if I ever was happy.  I no how to pretend to appear happy.  Thats not happy though.  I have had friends. Good friends with families that have helped …

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4

Keeping him with me…

May 19th, 2009by foreverinhisdebt

People used to tell me not to cry for someone, for they are not worth your tears. The one who was worth your tears would have never made you cry. I didn’t believe in that sh*t. I met this person, and fell madly in love with him because of how kind and caring he was. I was certain we would always be together, because we always talked about getting married and having kids. Mind you, I’m 16, and he’s 18. So yes, we were young. But I loved him. While we were together, I was constantly getting bombed by my all too perfect stepmother about

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5

Voices in my Head

May 19th, 2009by voicesofdoom

I try to remember why I wanted to kill myself. I don’t know. I can’t recall, but somehow I still know why I want to be out of this “reality”. Sometimes I wish I was in an empty space, where I can hear nothing, not even a sound, not even me breathing, nothing at all.

I was 12. It was long ago now. I wanted to die, but i never found the courage enough, then this person cae to me, she helped me a lot, and I don’t even remember what she looked like. I felt I was I love with her, she took care of …

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2

numb

May 18th, 2009by helper

i sit here numb,

unaware of my surroundings ,

knowing i am here but am almost watching myself, in and yet out.

 

what can i do to stop this,

what can i do to move on,

and what can i do right now?

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1

I can’t do anything right!

May 18th, 2009by harmlessfun

I just wrote a post on how my life sucks right now and I managed to lose that by pushing the wrong button. I so suck. Life sucks. So whats the use in living this way. To me, suicide is peace and I need peace.

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1

My Fathers Suicide in 2008

May 18th, 2009by kmk784

MY STORY

By Kelli Pedrick-Karlton

Written in 2009, a little over a year after my Dads suicide…

Late one January morning in 2008, I fell asleep on the sofa, something I rarely did and haven’t done since.  The kids were all over me and the house as I slept, but I managed to get a good nap in.  I was awaken to my house phone ringing, then my cell phone ringing, again the house, again the cell.  I thought it was

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2

Is this finally it?

May 18th, 2009by alecto3

Firstly I am bipolar.

Last April (08) my husband and I split. It had been coming for years for me, but some how my husband had no clue no matter how many times I tried to tell him. 6 months after our seperation I started dating an old friend and we have been happy together. When my husband first moved out everything was fine. I had a great job, I was paying all the bills and I live with my disabled parents so I am supporting 3 kids, myself and both of them. But I did that no problem. Then, around Thanksgiving the rumors started about …

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1

breaking point

May 18th, 2009by helper

i am on the break, but i don’t know if it’s the break of life or death… i feel as though i am floating, and i feel a though i have lived this moment before, i don’t care what people think or do anymore, i can go run or walk, but i get back and i could have not done it, there’s no difference…. i just don’t feel… i sit alone, confused, and floating

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