For 3 years now I have really liked this guy. (gonna call him Bob) I got his number at a party and started texting him. We wrote notes to eachother, went to movies, and the last few months he would come over so we could hang out. He considers us to be best friends, and tells me how crazy he is over this girl he works with. I want him to be happy, even if that means im not in the picture. But listening to him talk about other girls kills me and im too scared to tell him… Â I broke up with my first […]
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3 Years
Hey everyone, I’ve been a long time lurker, this is my first post. I don’t really know where else to go to get advice or support or anything like that.
Basically I’ve had depression for 3 years now (I’m 18, turning 19 in a few months), and I’ve just been suffering through it, I’ve been thinking about suicide every day but I’m too much of a coward to just do it. In all honesty, if I had a gun or something, I’d do it, but I’m just scared of the pain.
Anyways yeah so I’ve been talking about it with one of my friends and this girl […]
I feel numb when it comes to talking about my problems. I’m not perfect, i’m fat, tall and ugly. I’ve been verbally abused since middle school by my fellow “classmates” and my older sister. My parents are seperated, so when theres problems, I’m the one that has to stay strong and it’s hard when you get blamed for the seperation. (What could I, the child, possibly have done.) Nothing. So far the only thig that helps me get through these suicidial thoughts is the ton of ibuprofen i take everyday and my constant reminder to stay strong for my mother who has been on suicidal […]
I haven’t been on this website since April. Holy moly is that ever a long stretch.
Just needed something to vent onto.
I’ve had a countdown for 200+ days until my friend came home from a school exchange from Spain. She came home on the 22nd, I was very excited to see her.
On the 20th of June I had surgery on my throat and nose, that caused me a lot of pain that I am extremely good at hiding. I was and still am in constant pain but no one ever comments on it because they think I am just that strong. Â I found […]
Amy, its been 3 years since your passing and I want to leave you a message but never knew where without being ridiculed and questioned whether or not I’m not ok. I was thinking of the day we me so young and carefree I was hopeless and depressed when you met me. That changed so quickly I suddenly had purpose for everything I had a reason to like myself and to like the world around me. I still have your glasses from freshman year safely perched next to the last picture of us, the last time I didn’t fake my smile, the last time […]
Thursday morning… This existence is painful, I cant take it anymore. I have no friends all of them have betrayed me, or fucked me over. My family offers no support with anything that I’ve ever done. Every girl I’ve ever met has used me, cheated on me, then got their new boyfriends to bash me. I was abused as a child by step father, and abandoned my real father. Every choice I’ve ever made has been wrong in someones eyes. My best friend overdosed on ice, and has been in a psych ward for the past 3 years, he doesn’t even know who I am. […]
For the past six months I’ve been strugling with severe problems in my life. The main reason was breakup with my girlfriend after 3 years. Since the breakup I havent slept more than 5 hours a day, I don’t even go out anymore (in fear I might see her) and overall I’ve isolated myself from the outside world and things got so far I’ve been inches away from commiting suicide, however there came a point where things started to go more positive; me and ex talked about the breakup and deicided that it’s best for both of us if we just stay friends, I’ve got […]
This is about me 3 years ago and how I survived looking into the horror that I have created. I was a lonely person my whole life and I been reading all the time. What else does a boy with no friends have to do. Anyway at age of 17 I spent months in my room reading. I had hundreds of books there. And one book which I ran across had affected me in a very bad way. I got interested in it and I read it over and over and somehow suddenly it affected me. I began to have paranoid thoughts and become scared […]
wow, it scares me who i have become in just 15 years. i remember being very young 0-6 didnt give a fuck bout anything mainly cuz i was happy i lived in beautiful California had great parents (who gave me whatever i wanted) then a week before my 7th birthday my sister was born. then my life changed our house was way to small for a family of 4 so a year later we moved we were stuck in ahotel for 2 weeks before we finally got the keys to our new house which to me is way to huge for just 4 people i […]
hi all.
someone (me) took my username, so I used my username as my password. anywho.
some idiot told me to call the suicide hotline about a month ago, and I’ve called it before, and from many different states in the USA. this was about a month or year ago. I really do forget.
I tried to kill myself for about 5 years maybe ten. I stopped trying to kill myself about 4 years or maybe 3 years ago now. Now I bounce in between states, jail and doctors offices. it’s great don’t get me wrong, if I had a gun I would shoot hella stuff, but I […]
I make this question every day to myself, for something like 8 years. 8 years ago.. i came to italy, with my mother. My parents devorced when i was 3 y.o. and from then i lived with my granparents in russia. My mother gone to italy when i was 5 y.o. and i barely never seen my father till i was 10, then my mom took me with her in italy. she lived with an  italian guy, antonio. when i came to italy, he trowed us on street, with no money, without a reason. Thanks to some friends, we found a home for a month, […]
Its hard to put into words how much I truly hate every second of living on this earth. For reasons and forces unknown I wasn’t ever meant to be anything of value. my parents admit i was a mistake, not aborting me was an even bigger one. now im paying for their mistakes.
From kindergarten to highschool, I was always outcast. I was the kid that didn’t even get bullied because he was of lower social stature. which made no sense, I was nice. I always helped out and always tried to be a good friend. In all it was everybody’s fetish to use me for […]
this is really hard for me to post this.
i feel like i should. but I’m so nervous about even sharing it with people i will never know.
it started back when i was about 13. I felt really down. I didn’t really have any main friendship groups. I was having trouble with my family ad i just always had this feeling of being useless. I held a blade to my wrist. I wasn’t really sure what I was doing. I just felt like this was a way to make the pain seem real. and i still have scars there today 3 years later. This went on […]
Hahaha nothing really matters anymore and no one acts like they care so why should I. My hatred for everyone who talks/looks at me continues to grow. I care for almost no one and like i said they don’t seem to care about me. I wake up feeling numb and emotionless my nightmares wake me up in the night giving me the only sense of emotion I have.  I hate life tonight i think i am going to try suicide for the 4th time and it most likely won’t work ( let’s just say I would make a really sucky murderer) and when it doesn’t work it […]
I hate my life… I’m currently 29 years old with no job, no money, no spouse of any kind, no career, no car, failed college, no friends, no hopes, dreams and goals for my life. I’m so sad. I live with my mom because I have no where else to go. The love of my life, we weren’t official but it felt real for 3 years, left me for one of my friends in July, 2011. I got fired from my old job in November 2011 and ever since then I cant seem to get a job thats willing to hire me. I been so […]
I have no idea what to do. I just need some help, I guess.
So, here’s my story.
I’ve been battling depression & anxiety for 7 years now. I’m sure I’m not unique here.
I’ve also been fighting Interstitial Cystitis for 3 years. Basically, my immune system is trying to kill my bladder. I’m in constant pain. It feels very similar to giving birth. I can’t deal with the pain anymore, and there is nothing the doctors can do to stop the disease or the pain.
I just broke up with my boyfriend of nearly a year a few weeks ago. Not a problem. We just didn’t […]
Im tired n going to fix that someday, if you know what pain is i can promise you that the pain i have is on a level so high that no painkillers helps, o nice…
I just dont want to wake up tomorrow, i just dont want to do that.
In my eyes life isnt worth living in anymore, there havent been a painfree day in my head since 1983 after a car crash, i died in that crash but somehow they got me back, my biggest misstake in life. Took over a year to learn to walk again after this accident.
Got a job […]
Haha wow my bestfriend of 3 years let me barrow his facebook so i could check up on someone for him and i read the messages to her and he agreed with her that i was boring and annoying and i couldn’t believe my eyes because i always stuck up for him when the same person said something bad about him. I now know that you can’t trust anyone not even the person you thought you knew…i guess i never really knew him at all….
My girlfriend talks bad about me behind my back and says how im boring,annoying and i don’t show affection and she’s […]
My name is Pete. Everyday I think about that day. I was reminded again today as I watched the news of Junior Seau. I pray for his family and his children. I had a difficult childhood especially high school. Little did I know that once high school is over a whole new life begins. No more harrassment no more bullying. I have read many posts on this site and I decided to write today!!!
On May 20, 2009, I got a phone call from my dad. He informed me that something was not right! It was a weird phone call because my dad nevers calls me. […]
25 years ago I committed a federal felony. I stole money from the bank I worked at. The details don’t really matter-I confessed to it because my conscience got to me & returned the money. Even though I did my time & paid my fines, I ruined my life. It in reality is a life sentence. Not even the POTUS has the authority to expunge the record after all these years. I managed to survive through the years but this economy has been impossible. I had been doing well: had my own home, a rental property & a […]