I am new to this site and it’s a little comforting To be honest. My story is a long one I’m only 17 & life is hard. Its gotten so bad that all I do anymore is stay anoint in my room. Not a day goes by that I cringe at the fact of getting out of bed and starting the day because I know what is goin to happen. I wake up and as soon as I leave my room it starts..the daily morning insult from my dad..its something every day…your nothing…you will never be anything..worthless…your a waste of a human life…that’s just at […]
Amp
So I’ve struggled with depression for years now. I’d say since I was about 13-14. Middle school was when I first contemplated suicide & it was after my very first boyfriend broke up with me. We didn’t date very long & things never got past first base. I’ve always been an emotional person, letting things get to me that shouldn’t.
Well over the years I’ve had my fair share of boyfriends (back to back really), and I wear my heart on my sleeve. I’ve realized I may have developed some co-dependency issues from the lack of knowing how to be alone. And to this day, guys […]
My name is ryan, im 23, i have been shy and quiet all my life. I have severe anxiety, nobody understands me, i am hard of hearing i wear hearing aids. I dont consider myself ugly, but people make me feel that way. I have been a screw up most of my life, when i was 11 i started smoking weed, which then became the root of all my problems since then. I meant an amazing girl at the same time, i dated her from the time we were 11 to 17. In jr high i started getting addicted to marijuana, i skipped school, i […]
My sister died two weeks ago. Both of us had struggled with depression all our lives, but found different ways to deal with it… which caused us to have little in common the last few years. We had been communicating again and on good terms since summer, but had not actually seen each other (except when she was in the ICU) since a family get-together about two years ago.
At that event there was drama, which I loathe, and a lot of misunderstanding and misrepresentation of a letter I’d written her saying I was just completely burned out, used up, and could not function any more trying […]
For the past 10 or 12 years i have known that things in my life weren’t right. How on earth did i allow my sad pathetic life come to this? Alls i know is that i can’t take it anymore, constant thoughts of suicide even if i haven’t guts to do it i still have this strong feeling of wanting to die. I often question my very existance. I do understand what people are trying to do when they write stuff like ” It will get better” stuff like that, but at the same time it never does get any better. Just a few things […]
No one understands how i feel insde. How much every piece of bad news i recieves absolutely kills me & pushes me further into depression. At school i keep my walls up, everyone thinks of me as the girl that’s always happy.. But on the inside i’m not. I’m young, but i’ve gone through a lot in my life. No one my age could understand my struggles, i wouldn’t want to bother anyone with all my problems anyways. Sometimes, (like right now), the bad in my life out weighs the good. & this makes me feel like I should just end my life. My mom […]
I know I’m only 19 and I have a lot of growing up to do, but I feel as if there’s no future for me to look forward to. I had a very hard life growing up, I had to deal with both physical and verbal abuse at the hands of my mother. I never received hugs, kisses or I love you’s from my mother. She rather beat the shit out of me everyday call me names like stupid, heffer, ungrateful and dumbass. My bi-o dad is not in my life.i haven’t seen the man I should call daddy since I was 2. He and […]
Just want to say to all who is in hard time at the moment, STAY STRONG, you were born to make a diference in this world.
You are just so much better than those people or things that upset you, who ignoring you, who or what makes you scared… There are people who love you and who DO care for you, they may be near, or you’ll meet them later in your life (you sure will), and they need you. Think about them. Do not be selfish. You are wonderful, beautiful and this world needs you!
Believe in yourself! I DO!
Read some books, look for answers, talk to somebody, look in to yourself, try […]
Here we go again.. All those painful thoughts of you.. The way you used me for sex, the way your kissed me, the way you lied, all of it..
You took my innocence away when I was 13.. I don’t understand how you could? I just wanted to cuddle.. But every time we madeout you would get hard & want me, slowly undress me & pull me on top.. When I tried to get off you pulled me back down.. It hurt so bad! It felt like fire inside of me.. How could you?
Am I Insane? Waking up in the middle of the night craving just to self-harm, I could feel the need on my scarred wrist just so temped to grab my razor & press the cold metal against my skin. Deeper & deeper gliding across; red gushing out everywhere off the sides of my wrist & down my arm.  “I wanna cut, I need to cut†I could see my skin break as the tip of the knife goes down my arm with blood spilling out of my arm. Since that night I’ve been craving to cut & all I think about is suicide attempts. Maybe if I […]
first off let me start by stating that i dont believe in any sort of afterlife. i dont belive in god or heaven or hell. i dont believe in reincarnation. i believe that once we die we are just simply…gone.
anyway my boyfriend died a little over a year ago from heroin od. we used together but we had a falling out & he started shooting up which we never did. at around the one year mark (august) i felt like i had finally recovered and moved on from his passing but lately ive started shooting up and i chase that feeling constantly… that rush. […]
I’m two faced, one good one bad. I hate it. I was suicidal, a smoker and an alcoholic for some time. Im only 13. I was in a hospital a few weeks ago for suicidal thoughts & attempts. I still hate myself, but I realize that if I commit suicide, I won’t ever rest. There, I met amazing people with problems. They made me stop hating myself by a little, and spending time around them helped give me a new insight to life.
My mom & I have never been on good terms, & when we finally were, I thought that now i could kill myself […]
You are pathetic.. Using me? Who the hell do you think you are? I thought it was odd how you just wanted sex, even thoe we are not dating! Then I go onto facebook & see you gave your ex a hickey after we hooked up? Then telling me about ‘Brooklyn’ sounds like a whore too me. I think you should just be alone till you can figure your shit out dude! ***** your laying in bed with her yesterday when you had sex with me Thursday!? Todays fucking Sunday! What the hell.. I’m done.. I can’t do this shit anymore!! I THOUGHT YOU LOVED […]
Yes; How long can I stay here?
I get treated like shit! There is no other way to explain it. I still believe my father hates me deep down.. for calling the cops on him because he was out of control.. Would you rather of been to prison for the rest of your life? Exactly! I saved your sorry ass. When you said to me ‘I hate you’ ‘Your dead to me’ ‘I don’t want you in my life’ & also called me a ‘*****’ ;; I just wanted to punch you! See why beer does to you?! This hasn’t happened once, its happened […]
Today marks one year since my dad passed..
its crazy even thinking about it bcuz it feels like it was just yesterday. I will never forget seeing him in his casket at his funeral. That had to be the hardest thing to ever witness or even deal with, but I did it & i’m so proud of myself.
i’ve gotten through so much shit this year ! i’ve accomplished so much, yet made so many mistakes. i’ve messed up so bad at times, but I tried to make him proud the best way I could.
Daddy, i’m so sorry for everything i’ve done, all the mistakes […]
I don’t want to tell my life story or seek attention, I’ve always been told all of us women are attention whores & drama queens. I try to avoid being either. So I’ll just say this, I would like to cut myself up as much as possible & die in my fathers bed. He is the core of my screwed emotional state I’m in, but I make it no better because I am immature & dumb. That’s all.
Growing up in mexico was hard :/ …I am 15 now I have a sister that is 14 && 2 brothers younger than me, one is 10 the other one is 4 ..Being the oldest is ALOT ! When I was 6 I had to start babysitting a new born ..My mom was never there ,My dad left us when I was 4,He was a dam drunk & I fucking hate him for those two reasons..I was sexually abused by my uncle when I was 4 but I still talk to him like nothing happened D; .. I never had a childhood …i was always […]
Is it a Solid Way to die if I push a sharp-pointed object ( e.g. an ice-Picker ) with Force into my SupraSternal-notch?
Suicide is Mandatory.
‘… And if so, than how can I best do it ( e.g. the Angle at which I aim the sharp-pointed object into (…) and what I should do with my Neck & Head during impact to increase the chance of dying. ) ?
i don’t eat anymore.
I am killing myself inside- i know, so stop telling me. Maybe this is what i want…
People say they’ve seen i have lost weight, this is what i aim for, so it must be helping.
Im not that stupid that i dont eat ALL DAY & ALL NIGHT, because all of my friends say that it just makes you have a bigger belly. So i have small meals, or starve myself until dinner (which i dont eat much of)…
I have had two cups of tea today to keep me awake because no food = no energy…
Slept in til midday as well because then its […]
I sure fooled them. I took that precious college diploma, that winning personality, those great looks and trashed them all right before their eyes. My brain is jelly from all the pills and “treatment”, I’m about as charming as a corpse, and the scars & torn hair make me look like one too. And soon I’ll just be one of those anonymous suicides that they won’t bother investigating because they have other things to do. If the gang could see me now.